Ranch Hand

A talk with Johnny

There was no indication of anything fizzling out. In fact, both of them were still mostly hard.

Harry was astonished at how excessively mind numbing the experience had been. How Louis had known just what to do—what felt good, and what felt out of this world. Louis had uncovered what Harry liked just by Harry's reactions.

As they drifted in and out of sleep, Louis was too aware of what would happen come morning. Tomorrow's arrival meant someone would be bringing them supplies. And by now, he was certain Leo had told everyone about himself and Harry, and how they'd put their arms around each other, making a rather flagrant statement. And with the others being well aware there was only one bed in the cabin . . . well, the secret was out.

He hoped it would be Johnny that delivered. Johnny had seemed to sense what was going on, even though he'd never articulated it. And maybe Louis could have a private word with him . . .

Yeah, he needed to talk to Johnny. Louis would mention it to Harry in the morning, but for now, they were relaxing and taking a lot of comfort in each other. The lust remained, gently cloaking them, but for now they just held each other.

Harry was eager to learn about sex. But he was downright anxious about the outcome and possible consequences of this "relationship." Guilt wracked him again. He'd shown up at the ranch, talked Louis into a job, and now he was ruining Louis' entire life. If he'd just walked away when Louis had refused to give him a job, it would have saved Louis all this hassle and vexation. Also, if he hadn't been so self-absorbed in the first place, he wouldn't have permitted this to happen at all. He'd just been so attracted to Louis. Was he hurting Louis, and possibly Louis' reputation as a rancher? Was he being terribly selfish?

Louis, on the other hand, was in a blissful state of mind. He hadn't done a very convincing job of resisting Harry. For some reason, that made him want to smile. He tried to tell himself he didn't give a fucking damn about what anyone else thought. If things worked out, and he had a real chance at Harry, it would be more than worthwhile. But it would have to be mutual—they'd have to feel the same way about each other. If one of them didn't return the feelings, it could be disastrous. Suddenly, he didn't feel quite so blissful anymore. These thoughts were why Louis vacillated so much when it came to Harry. If he knew what was best for both of them, he really should send Harry back tomorrow with whomever brought the supplies . . .

Early the next morning, they sat on the mountain top in their usual spot, sipping coffee and talking, easy with each other. Most others in their place might have avoided eye contact and kept the subjects to safe topics. But it felt as if they'd both been waiting for this day in their lives, not really knowing what it was they'd yearned for, but having found it, they knew it was what they'd been looking for all along. The doubts Louis had had last night were already fading fast.

"Me restless yearning is completely, entirely gone," Harry announced proudly. "I know I already told you that, but there isn't a trace of it left. I didn't reckon I'd ever escape it."

Louis smiled and slipped an arm around the younger man. "I don't want anyone hurt," he repeated the words that he'd uttered before to remind Harry of how precarious this really was.

Harry felt that sting of sadness again, but had to admonish himself that this was very new between them, and Louis would have to be convinced that he was serious, and not playing games. He felt shaky inside though, at the possibility of Louis not feeling as deeply as he did. He wasn't sure what it was he was feeling, but he did know Louis made him feel light-headed and unsteady. All he wanted to do was stare at Louis, touch Louis, kiss Louis. No one else held his interest the way Louis did. When Louis told a story, or joked around, Harry was captivated, and he remembered hardly being able to behave normally in front of the other ranch hands. Louis was like a very interesting, suspenseful movie to Harry. He didn't want to miss a second of it. If he took his eyes away, he might miss something.