23 – Holding Others Accountable
My mom said she had some negative energy. Out of nowhere while we were hanging out in the kitchen she told me this. That she didn’t understand but there were these thoughts that told her to do some negative things. I told her not to listen to those thoughts, that she should shut them off. So she tried to tell me about them and I told her again “so don’t listen!” My mom was a very fearful person, stricken with doubt, worry and paranoia most of the time. My friend said:
“We cannot expect to receive what we intend if we are doubtful we will receive it. That is not intending, that is doubting. Intending must have no cross-purposes to truly be intent.”
He went on to teach me some more about holding people accountable to the truth.
“When attempting to heal someone who is holding back the whole truth, we have to let ourselves challenge that person and raise a stink. The bear has to have teeth. Often the issue is hidden self-importance. Self-importance cannot be struck down with pretty words. Often, it has to be provoked. With you I acted out and got pissy. You responded defensively. I intentionally made you become more and more defensive until it was plainly obvious that your defensiveness was completely irrational. This is very helpful because it forces you to see there is an issue.
A spiritual being does not annoy people for enjoyment, there is being a dick just to be a dick, and there was being a dick with a strategy. Being a dick with a strategy means to create movement. It is okay to be a dick if it is part of a strategy and can be an important part of healing someone. Often the issue stems from a person’s isolation, as they have withdrawn in some way. In such a case, we do not care how the shell is broken as long as it is broken. We create waves inside the egg. Back and forth we turn it. Then at the right moment when the force is coming one way a little snap will break the egg.
So, we earn their trust then challenge them. We show them care then insult them. We shake things up, use our intuition to determine the right moment to snap until we get a spontaneous response that is over the top. This expression is akin to opening a pressure relief valve. We calm the person down after the outbreak. Then we demonstrate how the reaction was inappropriate. This leads us to the issue that is supplying the energy for the anxiety. We get the person to express it. The more they express the better they feel and the more elastic their focus. After a few sessions of this, they may not consciously realize it, but their body craves more and more elasticity. This is because that elasticity is required to accept truth. Truth is the answer.”
My friend said when healing someone he vacillates between mean and nice as needed. That being a dick with a purpose was part of behavior control.
“So in striving to change someone’s point of view, from that which is not the truth to that which is the truth, being a dick is sometimes necessary?” I asked.
“Yes, pushing and pulling then waiting for the moment to snap that one piece of truth at them that makes their illusion crumble. Sparking the wheels of truth to turn, this is how we can begin to change a person’s bad habits and begin to heal them.”
My friend went on to say,
“Sometimes you must make people angry to inspire them.”
Like lying is a bad habit. He said that we need to “Break the logjam.” I remembered when my friend had first done this with me. He would challenge my lies with the truth and I would become angry and defensive. It was then that I realized a very important factor in all of this. There was nothing wrong with purposely making a person angry if the purpose of the dickishness was to get them to open up about the truth.
That wasn’t being mean, that was actually doing them a favor! I began to understand why it was harder to show people that we care rather than not. Because it was a shitload of work! It is not like you’re being a dick just to be a dick, this would mean that your intent with someone is aligned with the purposes of sin. That is not cool. So there’s good dickishness and bad dickishness I thought as I laughed to myself. I also thought this to be very funny! My friend was teaching me the most fabulous things and I loved it!
“Get them to express their bad attitude so forcefully that even they can see it.”
He said that doing this was very effective.
“Usually you are a dick to lure the other one out.”
Meaning the persons spirit self. Other times you reel it in. I said, “Oh wow!” I was impressed! But then again, when wasn’t I impressed with my friend? He was a pretty impressive guy. I said I had done this before and thought I was being mean. I had no idea it was for the greater good! I mean I didn’t know there was a difference in dicks! Well, you know what I mean.
“One who is a seer of the truth knows how to make the best of every moment. Doing your best is never wrong. Your best is always right. Even if your best turns out to produce the wrong results, it is right that you did so because you did the best you could. One cannot do better than their best.”
I saw that our best was certainly how we learned from our mistakes and that because we learned from our mistakes we should be grateful for them. By being open to making mistakes when we try our best to live by the truth, we are growing closer with the spirit.
My friend reminded me that we “see” by silence. I told him that was something that I had not mastered yet. He agreed. I said I knew when I was able to master silence that I would be able to hear the spirit. I just had to learn how to shut those stupid voices up first. The annoying ones, that cause us to come to all kinds of irrational conclusions, until we’ve conjured up some whole scenario of what’s to come and we’re cringing in fear inside. Yeah, ya’ know, those noises.
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The Artistry of LIFE: Knocking on the WHITE DOOR
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