The Degeneration of Gwen Weaver

Still Sane

"Gwen? Gwen!" A voice echoes throughout my mind, slowly withdrawing me from sleep. Blinking spots from my eyes, the A-hallway bathroom slowly forms around me- the greenish tiled walls, the anti-bullying posters. Carly's dark-blonde hair tickles my face, and her wide brown eyes come into view.

"Gwen, what the hell happened? You act weird all day and then I find you passed out on the bathroom floor?! What aren't you telling me? Are you on drugs or something?"

I struggle to sit up. I feel weak, like all the life has been sucked out of me. The water is still running in the sink, overflowing the basin and creating puddles on the uneven floor. My Algebra textbook is splayed out and bent, surrounded by various pencils and pens from my backpack. Carly helps me up, demanding that I go to the nurse's office, but her cries fall on deaf ears. As if in a trance, I collect my things and attempt to stand up, but my knees buckle and Carly has to catch me.

"That's it, you're going to the nurse and I'm calling your parents."

"What?! No!" I protest.

They can't know about my hallucinations- they'll think I'm on drugs, or schizophrenic. I'm probably just tired, anyway. That's what I tell myself.

"What even happened, Gwen?"

"I just felt sick and fainted, I guess." The first lie I've ever told my best friend.

"Hannah said she heard shouting and she came in here and you came flying backwards and ran into her and cracked your head on the trash can." Carly retorts, "Gwen, you can trust me. Something's up with you, and I don't want you to get hurt."

"Fine, but no one can know. Not my parents, nobody."

Reluctance shadows Carly's features, but she sighs and mutters, "Fine. Deal. But promise me you'll go home or lie down in the nurse's office at least. You can make up a reason why, I don't care."

"Okay."

"Okay, then. Shoot."

"Well, last night, I had this nightmare..." I continue, recounting my panic attack and the hallucinations up until this moment. Even for me, Carly's face is unreadable. I finish, and there is an uncomfortable moment of silence before Carly speaks.

"Gwen..." She says tentatively at first, "I'm worried about you. This sounds serious. Really serious. Nothing like this has ever happened before, you're positive? Gwen, this is really bad. You need to talk to someone about this! Here, just let me make a phone call-"

I grab her slender arm, "No! You can't! You promised! It's probably nothing, but if you reacted like this, can you imagine what my parents will do?! You can trust me on this, okay? Carly? Please trust me, it's all I ask of you."

Carly looks at me suspiciously, but she lowers her phone.

"Okay, Gwen, I trust you, but if this gets any worse- if this happens again- you need to let me know."

I sigh in relief, "Yes, yes, definitely. Ohmigosh thank you so much." I give her a hug. "All right, let's go. I can your absence excused if you come with me."

She agrees, but the entire walk to the nurse's office she looks at me like I'm made of glass, and could shatter at any moment.

~~~

The nurse is a young man in his early twenties, sitting feet propped up on the desk, earbuds in his ears, oblivious to the world. The tinny sounds of pop tickle my ears like the strong scent of Axe that attacks my nose. Carly and I have a silent and furious battle over who will disturb him. I gently reach forward and tap the tip of his Nikes, but he remains oblivious. I try again. Nothing. Carly finally steps in and firmly taps his arm.

"Excuse me, Mister... uh," She glances down at the nameplate on the desk, "...Gertrude"

I stifle an snigger and she turns and shoots daggers at me.

He opens his eyes and hurridly sits up at the desk, fumbling with his phone in an unsucessful attempt to pause his music. Eventually he rips the earbuds out of his ears and looks up at us.

"Yeah, my name's not Gertrude. I'm Adam. I'm filling in for ol' Aunt Gertie while she's on vacation." He drawls.

"How are you qualified to do that?"  I interject.

He cocks his head, "I'm a nursing student, Miss..."

"Weaver"

"Well, Miss Weaver, how might I be of service to you?"

"She fainted at lunch today. She'd like to call her parents."

Adam turns to Carly, his entire demeanor changing at her charming smile.

"Yeah, sure."

What would I do without that girl?

Adam gives Carly a late pass, gives me the go-ahead to use my phone, and promptly sticks in his earbuds and goes back to sleep. As I listen to the phone ringing, I study him- his dark skin, his short curly hair, his polished sneakers with muddy soles. A slow tingly buzz fills the back of my mind, threatening to grow. Suddenly, a burst of images flashes before my eyes-

                                                                             academic scholarship

parents five thousand miles away

                                                                                                                      music is impractical to study

                                                     roomate always partying

that one girl                             

                                                                                        failed the first semester exam

-and just as quickly, it ceases. I stumble, dizzy, but regain my footing. The buzzing abates enough so that I hear my mom's muffled voice on the other end.

"Sweetie? Hello? What's wrong?"

In my head, I laugh bitterly. What isn't?

A/N If you're reading this, I'd just like to thank you for getting this far. If you don't mind, why don't you go ahead and press that little star? Yeah? Anywho, thank you for reading, and if you have feedback I WILL read and respond to it. All right. Bye!