Project Alation [Completed]

Haven

The girl stared up into the darkness, her arms crossed behind her head as she lay on the soft mattress. Her back ached, but she ignored it, her focus captured by her mind. Thoughts, feelings, memories, ideas, hopes, dreams. So many, so familiar, so right, so foreign, so wrong.

They didn't belong to her.

But who was she?

When she woke up disoriented and in a hospital bed she was Sargent Heather Ronerios, recuperating after a field injury. When the doctor told her what they had done to her she was Case Study Safeguard, the memories of a 32-year-old in a 19-year-old body. When her escort convoy was attacked and she fled she was Heather, a traitor who disappeared into the snowy forests on a stolen snowmobile.

When she requested a pickup through her contact in the Rebel forces she was Tone, an anonymous mole for the 'ragtag' anti-government forces. When she arrived at one of their bases she was Safeguard again, the whole reason her escort had been attacked. When she learnt the nature and backstory of her Case Study she was caught between identities.

A random girl - I - had been kidnapped off of the streets and her - my - memories were completely wiped. Somewhere overseas, Sargent Heather Ronerios - I - was killed in an armed conflict only months after volunteering to have her - my - memories copied for science.

Sometime after the girl - I - had been wiped and Sargent Ronerios - I - died, the Sargent's - my - memories were implanted into the girl's - my - body, which was enhanced to give it - me - superhuman abilities. When they - I - woke up it was the memories of Sargent Ronerios's - my - personality that tried to control the girl's - my - body and act as though nothing had changed.

But as time went on, they - I - have become increasingly aware that the - my - memories and the - my - body aren't compatible. Remembering Heather's - my - experiences doesn't feel like remembering. Moving the way Heather - I - used to move doesn't feel natural.

I am not Sargent Heather Ronerios mentally. I am.

I am not the girl physically. I am.

I am neither. I am both.

I don't have a name. I cannot remember. I have more than anyone will know.

I am Case Study Safeguard.

I am in Alation. I am an Alation.

...

I'm going to die. Not again if I can help it. Aren't I already dead?

The first Alation was captured by the Rebels without them realizing who he was until after he willingly joined their forces. Like me. He didn't have any memories.

The second Alation was killed by the first. I'll kill him if he tries. I don't want to die.

I am the third Alation. The third to be lost to the military. The second to have memories wiped. The second to defect. The first with implanted memories. The first female.

The girl sat up and swung her legs to the side of the bed. Hesitated. What am I doing? Pacing. Going to the gym.

She pulled on her shoes, still wearing the leggings and sports bra she had worn when she left the hospital, the fleece sweater remaining in the dark room. Heather had been listening intently when she was given a tour of the base - usually hopeless without a map - but the girl had no hesitations in trusting in her feet to bring her to where she wanted to go.