Mr. Cold-hearted

Chapter 12: About love I

We walked for almost 15 minutes, this time in silence. She didn't say anything, I was just staring at the stars and thinking about her eyes. Woah, were her eyes stars? I'm not sure but I feel dizzy and I get lost in them every time I have the opportunity to stare at them.
We walked and walked, it was about 10 p.m. the weather was cold, I didn't have my jacket but I didn't feel cold at all.
We got into a nice park I had never been before, it was really cute, lots of trees, the moon and the stars made it even more beautiful.
We got into a house near of the park, it was even cuter, everything was so organized, the walls were light green and it smelled like cinnamon or like cookies, I don't really know, but it smelled so nice, I felt I was in a home, a really sweet home for the first time in my life. Some dumb tears dropped from my eyes.
- Welcome to my house!
- Thank you, I said.
- Oh no, no, no, what happens now?
- It's just, your house is really cute and it seems really warm and safe, it's perfect for a family.
- Yeah, then?
- It's just, I would like to have a home like this. My house is cold, there is no place for love there and then I see this home, warm, sweet, and I don't know, I feel jealous and sad. I feel like crap. You know, I would give everything to have a happy family. - And I started to cry, it really hurts inside. -
- Please take a sit, don't worry, you can cry next to me.
- Please hug me.
- Yes of course, please don't feel bad.
I cried for almost 15 minutes, until my eyes started to hurt.
- I'm sorry I'm taking your time for this whole dumb thing.
- No it's not dumb, she said.
- Really?
- Yes, it's not. I wanted to share with you my knowledge about religion and how it can improve your life, but you didn't listen and I'm glad you didn't, because now I have the opportunity to change your life, I always wanted to do something like that and now I have the opportunity. Just like you told me time ago, thank you, because now what I always wanted is happening.
- Okay, thank you, for being such an amazing human being.
- Are you sleepy? She said.
- Yes, I am sleepy, I'm also tired.
- Then we should rest a little, that's why I asked you to come to my house, weather can be freezing sometimes.
- Thank you very much again, but it was not necessary. I have an own house.
- Yes, but I wanted to continue, I want to help you even more.
- Thank you very much.
- Well, I hope this is not weird, but I only have one bed so maybe we should sleep together, if that's ok with you.
Haha I got kind of excited, but that feeling disappeared after some minutes.
- Sure, I would love to do that too.
We went to the bedroom and we lay in the bed, I separated the right side of the bed, kinda far from her since I didn't want to seem...disrespectful.
- Goodnight, I said. And I closed my eyes.
- No.
- No?
- It's just...ugh nevermind, goodnight.
- No, please tell me.
- It's just...I'm cold.
- Oh, you should...
- No, I shouldn't, I want something else.
- What do you want?
- I want to...cuddle, if you don't mind.
Haha gosh, I was really happy.
- Ok, I would love to cuddle too.
- Really?
- Yes, I'm cold.
We cuddled, I felt her arms around me, her warm body close to me, I caressed her hair and face.
I didn't want to sleep anymore, I just wanted to do that all night long.
- Now tell me... She said.
Have you ever felt something for someone?
- Yes.
- How many times?
- Lots of times but I think there are two of them you should know about.
- Okay, I'm all ears.
- I want to tell you about ******* and ******.
- Okay. What about the first one?
I sighed. - Okay, I met this girl time ago at school.
- Was she your friend?
- No, my classmate.
- That's cute.
- Well, at that time I was fifteen and she was twenty-one.
- Okay, continue.
- I met her at school, I was really really really shy, the first month at school I didn't realize about her presence because I have never been really friendly, I didn't know about her at all.
- Okay, then?
- The first day of the second month of school she confused and she got lost. I was waiting at stairs, with my poker face as always, but she suddenly appeared and kissed me on the cheek, she told me hello my name is ********, what's your name? My name is ______ I said. Nice to meet you, could you help me? Yeah, for sure.
Well I don't know where my room is. Okay, I checked the website and I saw we were going to share classroom. We'll study at the same classroom I said.
Oh okay, R101, right?
Yes.
Okay, thanks again, what are you doing, are you currently reading some book?
Yes... We talked for almost 10 minutes, she was actually really nice and kind. She even invited me to sit next to her, everything was fine, I thought she was really confident but it was a cool characteristic of her.
Then we said goodbye, we met again next class. I was waiting for her in the stairs on purpose, I think she noticed and she came and we talked a little, I met her friends, all of them were really nice, just like her.
After that I started to think she was nice and pretty, maybe I started to feel something for her.
- Oh, what happened next?
- I bought her a chocolate, I waited for her at stairs, but she didn't come. She came to class and she waved me, she invited me some of her food so I gave her the chocolate, I was so nervous, the teacher noticed it and he started to laugh, God I felt so silly, but she was really happy for that, she said oh thank you very much and smiled a lot. She shared the chocolate with her friends, everything was going on perfectly but I felt really dumb and ashamed to be honest.
That thing started to get common, I used to buy her chocolate almost every class and she was always grateful, her smile was just the perfect prize.
I remember when I was helping some of her friends with homework, she joined us and she said: hey I'm cold, can I hug you? I felt like it was a dream, everything was going on in the best way, I hugged her but I was nervous so I kind of slapped her back, it was awkward.
But she was being really cute that day, she told me that she was sleepy so I said:
Would you like a chocolate?
Aww yeah, please. And she lay her head on my shoulder and hugged my arm. Fortunately teacher didn't notice about it.
I asked for permission to leave the classroom and I bought two kind of chocolates, one for her and one for her friend because I didn't want it to look like I was trying to conquer her, but it was obvious. She said thank you, you are really thoughtful.
That day I was so happy, I thought for a moment that she might actually like me, the next day after class I waited for her at stairs and I offered her a soda but she told me that I was just a child and that she appreciates me, she also said I had to be careful because people can take advantage of me. Then I think our friendship disappeared, she didn't want me to sit next to her anymore, I offered her more chocolates, but her reaction wasn't cute, she just told me thanks. I bought almost 40 chocolates in the 8 months she was my classmate, sometimes I wanted to cry, sometimes I wanted to smile. Luckily that feeling is gone now, I don't hate her. I just wish she could be happy with someone else...
- Oh, I don't know what to say sorry.
- It's fine, you've done enough...
- Is there another thing you would like to share with me?
- Yes, I would like to tell you about ******, this story is pretty more depressing.
- Okay, I'm all ears.
- But first, please let me hug you, I think I'm going to cry again.