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Chapter 3

Two weeks flashed by so quickly, my panic attack did not repeat itself. I threw myself into work and kept all distractions away from me, I told all friends and family that I would be out of communication for an undeclared amount of time and that I would contact them when I was able to. This meant that no one asked or spoke to me about the impending date with Leo. Clear head, clear life.

Even though was Saturday I was at the lab, I am fully aware that the date was tonight but I shall not be throwing off my schedule for anyone and I know with a focused mind I could get a lot done today. I am able to record some new findings in my research as well as get through some administrative work; reply emails, send proposals, update personnel and directors. An overall productive day.

At about 2 pm I receive a text from Leo asking where I should be picked up from and I reply that I would be making my own way so he should just send the time and address to me. If I can minimize time spent together then that would make this day more pleasant.

I HOPE YOU HAVE A GOOD TIME ON YOUR DATE. MAKE AN EFFORT.
- LOVE ALEXA

Looking At my phone I see that it's 5:30, I quickly reply Alexa with a simple 'Thank you😊' and I glance at Leo's message again. I have a rough idea of the location but I should leave now if I'd want to be there at six. Taking off my lab coat and grabbing my purse I make my way out of the lab.

"Have a good weekend Dr Violet." the security says

"Thanks and same to you, Sir" home training on a 100.

In my car, I pull out the GPS from the glove compartment and put in the postcode before driving out of the parking lot.

'Ok Violet, you can do this. You're strong, you're confident, you're freaking Nigerian, you are your father and mother's daughter so pull yourself together' I'm going over Alexa's go to pep talk when my self esteem decides to take trips way from me.

Breathe in, breathe out.

Alexa has this theory that Nigerians are born with confidence (obnoxious confidence and pride she calls it) which can be a good and bad thing. It means that even when they are blatantly wrong, they'd still puff out their chest with a defiant look and refuse to back down on their stance. So anytime my confidence starts slipping she yells 'You're Nigerian, act like it". But I believe living so stubbornly can affect ones ability to learn and unlearn things, it keeps you stuck in your ways and diminishes the opportunity for development. But the right amount of confidence is definitely necessary to navigate life, especially when you know what you're bringing to the table and are aware of its pricelessness.

Arriving at the restaurant and parking my car, I make my way in. If Alexa saw me right now she'd probably faint. I'm not dressed to impress, I'm wearing a grey midi dress with black leather loafers, my hair is in a rough pineapple and there is no make-up in sight (unless lip balm counts). She'd lose her mind knowing I went to work and came here straight from there. Ha!

I see Leo waiting by the bar and even though he is a handsome man to look at, I am quickly reminded of who he is and why I don't want to be here. Lord give me strength. I walk up to him and clear my throat and he quickly turns around and stands.

"Good evening Violet. I'm so happy you could make it"

I want to reply, honestly, I do but I seem to have forgotten how to speak. My voice is actually caught in my throat so I give him a tight-lipped smile.

"Should we head to the table? The host already showed me our seats" I nod, following his lead to the table where he pulls out my seat, I sit and he takes his seat in front of me.

"Hello, would you like to get anything to drink while you browse through the menus?" The waiter asks

"Water with ice please" my voice comes out quiet and a bit hoarse.

"I'll have a sprit. Thank you" The waiter walks off and I keep my eyes focused on the menu. I'm so uneasy that I don't think I'd be able to keep anything down.

"Do you know what you'd like?" I shake my head to signify no

"They make amazing chicken here and if you like lamb, that's nice too. They do have vegetarian options just in case"

"Here are your drinks. What would you like to eat?"

"I'd like lamb chops with the couscous" Leo replies

"Can I have the salmon with a salad? Thank you" The waiter jots down our order and leaves. Some minutes pass between us before Leo speaks up.

"How have you been? I haven't seen you since the wedding and I must apologize for being MIA but I had to leave for work abroad."

"No problem" at this point I'm looking at his face. Trying to reconcile a beautiful face with a subpar personality. I know people change but all I'm reminded of are the events from that night at the club and it gets me angry.

"You're not saying much. Is everything ok?" This has me laughing and puts a confused look on Leo's face. I take a sip of my water as the waiter brings our food and leaves.

"Well, I'm seating across a man who insulted me just because I was looking out for a friend. Embarrassed me in public and I still haven't heard anything akin to an apology from him. Then he coerces me into giving him my phone number which he had already swindled from my friend, and tries to impose a date on me. Would you be ok if you were me?" I'm picking at my meal.

"You know what? I can't do this. I'm only here because of Alexa. Quite frankly I would have been so happy if I never saw you after that day at the club. After the wedding, I pushed you out of my mind and I hoped you had done the same. I don't know what you were hoping to achieve with this date. I was curious and well my curiosity has been satisfied and there was no use in me coming. Or maybe the silver lining was being able to get all that off my chest" I laugh. I signal for the waiter, I ask him to pack my food up and to give me my bill at the bar.

"I hope you have a good evening and life Leo. It was an interesting evening"

I walk away from him.