Players Regret

Chapter 13

Quanae P.O.V

"You and I were suppose to go our separate ways

No matter how much I fight it, but still I stay

I can't believe my conscious got the best of me

It's telling me to let it go but I can't walk away

Ya sister called me bout a couple times today

She knew I had to get something off my mind right away

I gotta get a grip, i think i'm losing it

I don't know why I'm so confused, Ooo Yeah.

I'm not tryna leave you, believe me

Cause what i'm going through it, ain't easy, nooo

Should I stay or should I go

But no matter how hard I try, I can't walk away

I'm no tryna leave you, believe me

Cause what i'm going through it ain't easy, ain't easy nooo

Should I stay or should I go

But no matter how hard I try, I can't walk away.

It's killing me, killing me to keep going on this way

I know I love you, but I don't know if i'm in love with you

It breaks my heart to say

We got too much work to do

So I don't know why I hold on to you

It gotta be some kinda way that we can work it out

Or I just gotta get over you baby, yeahh..."

I laid on the couch of Dj's house listening to this song. It was the defintion of my situation at the moment. I wiped my tears that formed in my eyes, just thinking about me and Dj's past.

A wise person once told me, not to go to war for someone who wouldn't go to war for me, but that person that does go to war for you, keep them. It's not a lot of ride or dies out there. Dj was just that. I was stuck between a ship and a hard rock at the moment. I've always had that fairytale wedding in mind, getting married to someone who loved me for me, and could take in all my flaws to make them into fortune.

It was killing me to allow a man to take the lead in my life all the time. It'll hurt me even more to run away from Dj and just completely forget about him. Heartbreak isn't a joke. It's like putting your everything into one, and once that person does the slightest thing to you, you feel unworthy of that relationship. It makes you feel so low as a person. It just makes you want to correct your imperfections and become the person they want you to be.

The last couple of years has been like that. I haven't been the Quanae that I should be. I'm 20 (the age I came up with to fit her character) and I should've been graduating from college, and actually doing something with my life. Instead i've just got back from being kidnapped, and been living in the shadow of someone who sometimes loves me, and sometimes don't.

If you were me, what would you do? Stay or go?

" See the moral of the story is that

Everybody had a love they ran back to

And I know that you've been wishing that they came around

So that you can just go and do you

And I know that you'll be looking for a girl like me

And I'll be looking for a guy like you

But it seems that love... it's just not enough...

I'm not tryna leave you believe me