The Book of Common

Cold

Yep cold is all I can say. Three foot a snow layer of ice over the snow. Cracked like glass as ya stepped
on it. Ifin it wasn't for the ice on top. Man sink
past his knees hell above my boot tops at least.
Damn near my knees. Ifin you haven't figured it
out I am up Maine way. Middle of winter, why you
say. Wasn't my a doin no. Feller at Ranger Station
One York said they been havin trouble.

Sense York handles most of Maine's patrol duty.
I got stuck freezing my backside off. No horse
damn horse didn't want no part of this.
Hell it stepped down couple times. Straight through the ice pack. Left back at the Station
Maine Ranger Station six only six. So that means
I'm so far north. About Kan-nada up near where
most think those Barbarians live.

Lan sake I hope not dealin, with this cold and little
backwards town. I am not one to talk bad about
people nor wheres they live how they a do it.

They reported a few missin one Ranger went out a lookin he didn't come back. That was back in summer. Hell now it's mid winter, these fools
can't tell the when and wheres of what happened.

So I have ta just figure it out on my own. Ranger
did leave a small note on what direction he was
headin. Town people didn't even search for him.

So I am crunching along this froze snow, least the
wind slowed a piece. About dark I build a fire
break out my blanket wool and seal skin liner
to sleep on. Found a halfway snow free spot under
a big pine. Set up a wind break had a good fire going.

Now you see Norm was lookin over near a small
lake supposed be a cabin built. No one a lives in it.
I was a gettin a might worried, Norm He doesn't like the cold. Being from Carolina way. Doesn get
near as cold mind ya now it gets cold at times.
Stay on track now Common that is another story.

Well Norm found me good warm fire a goin.
halfway dry spot to sleep.

He was shoutin about how blame cold it was
a tit on damn cow would freeze over. How ifin
I didn't want ta see my Ma wouldn't be in this
mess of cold. Then Old Norm mind ya call him old
it wasn't but about four years older than myself.

Told me Common I am sorry my feet feel froze over. This damn coat ain't near warm enough.

I don't have a seal hide to lay on. My blanket
wool think it's  wet. Dark and I didn't find a thing.
Well his blanket wool was dry.

Well I kinda felt bad, Ma was happy to see me
why Pa was even around. He liked Norm, thought
he was a honorable man. I did get my friend in
deep snow. I said Norm use my seal hide, I'll
just tough it on the blanket wool. Stay close to the
fire. I'll be fine, I tossed it to him.

Norm just nodded said thanks, then he was all
laughs again. Norm my he was great fun, found
fun in about every thin. Well we figured the ones
went missin were all ladies about sixteen to
eighteen. Norm said what if they just took off,
went out met a sweetheart or somethin.

Well the thought did cross my mind, then I said
the Ranger went missin also. Norm shrugged bear
wolves could of got him. Hell could of fell off his
horse broke his neck far as we know.

Norm thought a minute we check the last spot
he was headin. Can't find him we are done.
I am tired of cold wet frozen weather.
Common we head south soon as we can.

I smiled rather be South far as we can get, wetlands sound might fine now.

Next morning well it wasn't any warmer.
Tell you Norm was right freeze tit off a cow.
Shivered some as drank a little coffee and corn
whisky. Couldn't get warm, the seal hide does
wonders I tell ya. Norm He was up whistlin
said Common if want to say we finished this
couldn't find a thing. I am good with that,
just I've never stopped before.

I could tell he really didn't want ta stop,
no I says we go on like you said.

We walked about half day, wouldn't you know it.
Came up on a cabin almost in Kan-nada.
Might of been up that way. Map gets kind of ify
up that way. Well we went to bang on the door.

My gosh it opened, this big brute of man, stepped
out dear me I about stepped four backwards.
Looked mean nasty like a brawny bear.

By gosh by golly Norm said jeez, Ranger mister
just want to talk is all.

He said Ranger it was low harsh like booming voice. Talk about what?

Well Norm said few went missin while back
Ranger also. Just like talk about that maybe get
warm, we got corn whisky share it. Well that
feller squared up, like those fist fighters do.
I am expecting him to unload few fists on us.
He laughed coffee yes, corn whisky no.
I got rye if you want to try it.

Sure I am Norm this is my partner Common,
like to give that try. Never had any don't think
Common has neither.

We sat down it was warm felt good not being
in the cold. Bear skin covered the window and over the door. It was built into the side of a hill.
We pulled out our tin cups, I said mister didn't
catch your name.

Oh I am sorry don't get many up here that don't
know me, they call me Bear not my given name.
That is Pat. Most stay away they fear me.

I said don't know about Norm but, lan sakes
you pushed the vinegar straight out of me.

Norm said last summer you see young ladies
out this way maybe a Ranger month after?

Saw the Ranger, not the ladies heard tell they
crossed into Kan-nada not sure though.
Told the Ranger if they did, best stay here head
back. They aren't bad people mind ya.
Just want to be left alone.

He poured more rye and coffee, Norm felt uneasy
could tell he always bounced his right leg a bit.

Then I noticed why, dear me two scalps long
blonde hair and dark hair. Just the color of two
that were a missin. Pat I says darn big fella
why you got scalps on the wall. Looks like lady
hair too.

Darn it all I didn't move fast enough to carry out
my plan. The table went flyin I went side ways gettin out of the way. Norm He must of fell backwards. Now Norm hell he normally knows
what I'll do about the same time.

Nope not this time. I am trying to pull my pistol
Norm gets his out damn hammer is frozen still.
He is forcing it back. About the time he gets
a full on wallop in the face.

I get the hammer cocked squeeze the trigger,
nothing darn it all. I keep it aimed finally she
fires. Pat shouts out damn that burns like fire!
He turns at me, that big nasty brawny man.
I fire again, nothing again! This time it doesn't
go off. Lan sakes my scalp is his I'm a thinkin.

Well I'm crawling backwards like a crab, pistol still in my hand. I stop throw the damn thing at him.
Hits him square in the face.

That gives me enough time to stand, get ready to
defend myself. I hears a loud bang smoke then
old brawny bear falls flat on his face.

Norm is smilin I'm dumb founded, thought Old Norm was out. He laughed hard he started coughin, knew you had something planned.
You moved faster than I thought you could.

Damn near got us both killed. Damn you Norm!
Piss and vinegar! We both darn near gots killed!

Well I commenced laughing till darn near fell.
All was right me and Norm made out.
Next time well who knows what I'll be a talkin
about.