To Build A Home

Chapter 8- Made With Love

Six complete months had passed. The halfway point came and went faster than the two expected it to, as it was reached just under a month ago. A total of 24 weeks have passed. Nearly 25. It was insane how quickly time had flown by. It seems like only yesterday she had noticed her heightened sense of smell.
Today, however, was very important. Today was dedicated to setting up the nursery. They had waited weeks for the final item to arrive. A simple crib. Steven had tried to explain that they could set up as things arrived, but Krolia refused to listen.
"Either it's all here or we don't start." She had said many times.
   All items were selected as a joint decision. It didn't take much for the two to agree on what to buy. They had only two criteria: safety and quality. Nothing that could injure or harm the child, and absolutely nothing without some sort of safety rail.
   There was however, one item that was not selected by the both of them. Krolia had—while looking through the lists of products in a catalog—come across something that she had instantly fallen in love with. A blanket. Plain in color, simple in design.
   It was made from a light orange-red colored fabric. It's description said it was 'for travel' and 'perfect for use at public changing stations', not for everyday, 'favorite-blankie' use. It wasn't meant to be a baby blanket. Not the normal kind. It had no cartoon animals, no fuzzy patches, no soft tassels on the sides or corners. Just a plain piece of fabric turned into a travel styled blanket.
   Regardless, she liked it more than the other options. Krolia preferred this simple blanket to the childish, fuzzy, colorful ones.
   She had waited rather impatiently for it to arrive, instantly, and oddly, keeping it with during many points of the day once it came.
   The both of them were not only excited, but also anxious to start decorating their child's room. Waiting for it all to make its way to their home was a difficult task.
But finally, everything was here. Krolia could hardly keep herself from becoming too excited when the two began getting the room ready.
Though her nesting instincts had not come yet, she was motivated by choice to organize a room just for her baby.
"Alright!" Steven said, opening the first box. "We can finally start this task."
The first item chosen—by Krolia— to set up was the crib. It was, in her mind, the most important.
She did, however, find its structure a little odd. "It looks like a cage..."
"What?" Steven withheld laughter as he examined the setup directions.
"I said, it looks like a cage. Why does it look like that? I'm not putting my child in a cage!"
"Krolia... It's not a cage. It's a crib. And the safest place for our child to sleep in."
"No way. I'd rather tire out my arms by carrying him around than let him sleep in that."
"Again with the 'him'." Steven chuckled, placing the packet of instructions down next to him. "You really do have your heart set on them being a he."
"No! Well, maybe. But that's not the point here! I'm talking about how uninviting this looks."
"First of all, its not finished, and second of all, its upside down." Steven picked up what they had put together, which included the base and two sides, turning it over. "See. Not a cage anymore."
"It's missing a top, but other than that, it's a—"
"A crib." Steven said, cutting her off. "It's a comfortable, invitin', lovely crib for our son or daughter."
"Fine, fine. It's a crib. But why does it look so weird? I mean.. The walls and such."
"Because, Krolia, human babies are very fragile. The 'walls' are put in place to prevent the child from fallin' out. Unless of course you'd rather take the walls away. Which is fine, but then the crib becomes an unsafe place. Although that would make it look less like a cage."
Krolia shook her head, "I'll keep the cage, thank you very much."

***

After adding the last two sides, Steven attached it to the stand, securing the two pieces together and standing it up the way it was meant to be.
"Huh... That's not what I thought it'd look like..."
"Krolia, enough with the—"
"I like it." She gave a joyful smile, not so subconsciously placing a hand to her stomach. "Now what?"
"Now we add the bedding. You know, mattress, blankets, those things."
Once the mattress had been set in place, Krolia spread the small, orange-red blanket over the soft surface, smoothing it out with her hands. Standing back, she nodded, approving their work.
"One more thing..."
"Hmm?"
Steven picked up a small bag from the floor. "I figured he or she might want something to comfort them if they're without one of us." He handed the bag to Krolia, who took it from him slowly. "It's cheesy and was definitely an impulse buy, but I couldn't not get it."
Reaching into the little bag, she felt her fingers touch a soft fuzzy fabric. Pulling the small object out, she couldn't help but but laugh at what he had chosen. "Where did you find this?!"
"Same place I found everything else."
"It's adorable!" She exclaimed as she held it out in front of her.
In her hands, she had a soft, pale blue baby toy in the shape of a lion. Its big, cartoon styled eyes and large nose made it all the more cuter.
"I take it you like it..?"
"Like it?" Krokia shook her head, eyes fixed on the childish plush toy in her hands. "I love it. It's because of the Blue Lion, isn't it?"
Steven grinned, glad to see how pleased she was with his choice of stuffed animal. "I saw it and instantly knew I had no choice but to buy it. If we're protecting the Blue Lion, then I hope that one day, she'll protect our son or daughter if it comes to that. It's all a very messed up idea I had in approximately three seconds, but in a sense, I was thinking that they'd have a lion of their own."
"That's a rather complex thought for an impulsive purchase..."
Steven laughed, realizing how everything he had just said probably sounded weird to her. "Yeah... But regardless, I bought it and you seem very happy with it."
"Oh, absolutely! I am very glad you bought this." Krolia placed the little lion inside the crib, resting it against the frame. "And I'm sure he or she will like it too."
   "I would hope so," he thought aloud, "it's cute and soft, there's no way they won't like it."
"If I like it, they'll have to like it too."
Steven raised a brow, looking at her with confusion. "Oh yeah? And what's that supposed to mean?"
Krolia shrugged, moving past Steven to another set of boxes. "I'm hard to please."
"Except," he began, turning his head to watch her unpack a new set of instructions and furniture pieces, "that baby seems to have won your affection quite easily. Took about a day before ya' started to feel affection towards 'em."
"Oh shut up!" She groaned, throwing a wad of plastic packaging at Steven. "Like you weren't immediately attached to them!"
"Yeah," Steven tossed the packaging aside, moving towards Krolia to help her out, "but I'm not a cold hearted, grumpy, and hard to please warrior like you apparently are."
"Wow... You're so mature."
Her facial expression suggested she was angry, but Steven could tell she wasn't just by her tone. Her voice proved she was amused by his comment.
"Okay, fine. I may have become attached to our child rather quickly. But that's just motherhood, right?"
"Not for you... Especially with everythin' you've been sayin' since you found out. I think it's just who ya' are. You're not cold in nature. Are you terrifying and threatening when you're angered? Sure, but are ya' also incredibly loving and kind? Absolutely."
Krolia paused in her work, waiting to see if Steven would continue. She wanted him to continue.
"I think motherhood had a part to play, but you're much more compassionate that you say ya' are. You're goin' to make a wonderful mother."
She could've started blankly at him for hours. Completely lost in his words, she couldn't believe what he had said. Steven meant every word, and for that, she was frozen in time. She would have stared at him for hours. If, of course, the child inside of her hadn't have moved about. "Wow..."
"Are ya' alright...?" Steven asked, eyes filled with worry.
"Am I alright...?" Krolia realized she had blanked out for a bit and quickly nodded her head. "Yeah! Yeah. I'm fine. Just.... You really mean that...?"
"Of course I do. You already have a strong connection to the child. Don't think I haven't heard ya' talking to 'em at night."
She blushed madly with embarrassment. "You... You hear that...?"
Steven nodded, "yep. And you don't say 'I'. Not once have you used that word. You call yourself 'Mama'. I hear a lot of it. More than I can remember."
"It's not weird... Is it?"
"Not at all. If anything it's the most normal thing we've experienced in the past six months."
Krolia couldn't help herself, she began smiling, filled with pure happiness. "That's good to hear." She started stroking her stomach, completely distracted by the movement within her she might as well have forgot why she was in the nursery in the first place.
Steven watched her for a few moments, pride in his eyes. "Alright, come on, Mama. Let's set up the rest of the room."
"Huh?"
"You heard me."
"Yeah... You called me Mama. That's... odd..."
Steven chuckled, passing her a few pieces to set up. "You better get used to it. You've got four months. After that, we'll be addressing one another differently. Unless you'd prefer him or her to call us by our real names."
Shaking her head, Krolia took the parts from him, "no... I'd prefer they call us Mama and," she paused, glancing at Steven, "and Daddy."
"You say it so weirdly." He said with a laugh. "And don't pause for so long."
"Yeah, yeah. I'll work on it." She opened the directions, beginning to set up the item known as a changing station. Something she did not understand the point of.
Steven sighed, moving to sit next to her, "If I'm being honest," he began "of what you say to the child, my favorite is, without a doubt, 'Mama loves you'."
"Well it's not false."
"And yet you worry if you'll be a good mother or not."
   "It's not worry, Steven." She said, looking over the instructions.
   "Then... What is it?"
   "You know I'm self conscious about all of this. You've known since I had that outburst a few months ago."
   He smiled, placing a comforting hand on her shoulder, "You've got nothin' to worry about. I know ya' can't see it now, but I can. What I see from your actions and hear from your late night whispers, is that you love this child. You already care deeply for 'em. And if I'm not wrong, you've adapted so well to each new step and change that we've been through."
   Krolia looked away, barely smiling. "I know what you're saying is correct, and I do believe every word, but I still can't shake the fears of my past." She let out a sigh, continuing with what she had to say. "Humans are such kind, loving beings, putting the lives of others above their own. You raise your children with so much love and affection... but I an not human. I'm a Galra. A race whose entire existence relies on bloodshed and murderous acts. The exact opposite of what it takes to raise a child. I know I love the child, and I know the love I feel is real, but... What if it changes? What if I change? What if between now and birth my feelings change. Or after they're born, what if I revert to my vicious nature? I almost killed you on multiple occasions. I'm not a loving being. I want to be! But I am violent at heart..." Krolia was visibly emotional, maybe even ready cry, but she wasn't typically one to cry. Sure, her hormones and mood swings set her on edge and forced her to be close to tears at times, but she's never actually cried. Although, by the looks of it, she might now.
   Steven didn't know what to say, he wanted to help her, he wanted to say something to make her feel better, but nothing came to mind.
   "I don't want to be a bad mother... I want to raise them with love. The way you would raise them. But what if I can't...?"
   Gently, he wrapped his hand around her fingers, slowly taking her hand from the floor. "You don't have to try an' be a good mother," he lifted her hand to his lips, kissing her finger tips, "You're already a wonderful mother... a naturally, kind, lovin', compassionate mother." Steven placed her hand on her stomach, keeping his own hand rested on top of hers. "You might not see it yet, but you are all of those things ya' want to be. You're already a great soon-to-be mother. By human standards, you're probably one of the most selfless and caring expecting mothers."
She said nothing. Krolia was silent, but she did slowly looked to Steven, forcing a smile.
"You've got nothin' to worry about." He reassured her, "I know my words mean nothin' to ya', but you can do this. You can raise our child the way you want, because you're you... you're nothin' like your predecessors."
"How are you so sure?"
"I'm sure, Krolia. I'm absolutely sure."
"Alright, then... how do you know?"
"You really don't believe me?" Steven nodded, chuckling a little, "You will eventually, Krolia."
Krolia very slowly nodded. "How are you so convincing? You said nothing..."
"I don't think I'm convincing... I think ya' just know, deep down inside that I'm right."
   "I know you're right, and that's the problem...! I know that my feelings and thoughts are, in a way, fake, because what you say is absolutely true." She hung her head, her eyes fixed on her stomach. "But despite all of that, I still can't shake the idea from my mind. I..." Krolia paused, taking a breath as her child moved and kicked. "I just want to be a good mother for our child..."
   "I know ya' do..." he lifted his hand from hers, tilting her chin up so she could look at him. "But you have got to believe me when I say that you are a good mother. You love the child unconditionally, and they're just barely over half their size. Don't let these thoughts an' feelin's blind you from that."
   "I... I'll do my best..." She agreed to his words quietly, her hand still placed on her stomach, rubbing it with her thumb.
   Steven leaned towards her, softly placing a kiss on her forehead. "I know you will..... Now! Let's finish putting the remaining bits an pieces together."
   The two worked diligently to finish the nursery. Once they were on task again, Steven kept the talking to a minimum until Krolia seemed to be in a much calmer, more relaxed mood, which is when they resumed their normal conversations.
   After the changing table was set up and equipped with sanitary items, paper towels and a comfortable mattress for their baby to rest on, they moved onto the dresser.
   It was small in comparison to theirs, but that's unsurprising. This is for an infant, not two adults like themselves.
   The setup for the dresser was simple, and the two finished it rather quickly.
   Next, were the decorative items. A night light, a lamp, two soft, fuzzy mats and a rocking chair. Krolia didn't understand the function of the chair, but it was incredibly comfortable, especially with the seat cushions the added.
   "Are we done?" Krolia asked, taking a seat in the rocking chair, tired out from all of the work.
   Steven looked around their surroundings, searching for something. "Not quite... there's one more box..."
   "Please no more building. I'm all worn out..."
   "Don't worry, it's not— Aha!" He found what he was looking for, and picked up the box with a victorious smile. "This was also an impulse buy."
   She couldn't help but laugh as he opened the final package. "What is this item? Another stuffed toy?" She asked teasingly.
   "Sort of, but this has a function."
   Curiosity kicked in, "oh, really?" She asked, getting to her feet, slightly struggling at first, before walking towards Steven.
   "I saw that." He glanced back, making sure she was alright.
   "Saw what...?" Krolia tried keeping a straight face, but gave in when she saw Steven shaking his head. "Okay, fine! Getting to my feet is becoming a challenge. So what?!"
   "I just want to make sure you're okay."
   I'm fine." She reassured him, leaning against the dresser as she watched him remove the last 'surprise'.
   "Be careful from now on, please..."
   "Alright... I'll be careful."
   With an approving nod, Steven presented her with the item in hand. "This, Krolia, is called a mobile. It comes in all sorts of different colors, themes and designs."
   "Uh-huh..." she stared him in utter confusion. "What does it do?"
   "Glad you asked." Steven attached it to one of the guard rails of the changing station, adjusting the length of the stand. "For a while, human babies can only see very short distances. They tend to stare at objects from time to time, ones that capture their attention. This is probably one of mankind's finest creations."
   "How so...?" Krolia tapped the side of the mobile, causing it to slowly spin. "Hey, it moves...!" She sounded moderately entertained by this newfound information.
   "Yeah, it does move, it's point is to grab the child's attention and," he passed pressing a button on the side, carefully making the thing spin again, "calm them down if they're scared or uncomfortable." Soft music played from the tiny speakers for ten or fifteen seconds before fading out. "Not to mention, the little toys are adorable."
   Krolia nodded, now smiling, "I think it's a sweet little addition." She pointed to the little plush items hanging from the mobile, saying "I like the them, too. The stars and planets. I take it this is representative of your solar system?"
   "Yeah... Its nothin' special, but I thought that if their mother was from a distant world, this would be a good choice for them."
   "You did a pretty good job..." she commented, looking around the room, running her hands along the lower part of her protruding stomach, feeling her baby gently kick in response.
   "I'm goin' to go out on a whim here and say you like this room."
   Instantly, she nodded, "Absolutely! I love it!" Her eyes drifted to her hands, "and I think they like it too..."
   "Can I...?"
   "Steven, you don't have to ask to feel your own baby...!" Krolia couldn't help but chuckle at how cautious and polite he was being. "Give me your hand."
   He did so, letting her take his hand and place it over her stomach. "This never gets old..." he commented, feeling the movement of the child beneath his hands. Hi voice full of excitement, yet still low and quiet. "Are you sure ya' don't want me askin' to feel 'em?" Steven asked, slowly retracting his hand
   "They're your child too. You're allowed to feel them whenever you'd like. As long as I'm in a good mood. Like I am now."
   "In that case..." Steven moved to stand behind her, wrapping both hands under her round belly and smiling. "You best get used to this."
   Krolia smiled, leaning back on him, "I think I already am..." She rested her hands on his, smiling even more at the feeling of her child, no, their child moving about in response to their actions. "I think they are too..."
   "They most definitely are..." slowly, he tilted his head to face her as best as he could. "You know... Despite all that has happen, you're somehow more optimistic than ever. Your hormonal imbalance gives you quite the character."
   "Either say something nice or I'm taking back your 'baby-feeling' privileges." She threatened in all seriousness.
   "You want a compliment...?"
   Krolia looked at him, eyes filled with disappointment. "Yeah... I do."
   "One compliment? That's kind of hard..." he could tell she was about ready to slap him, so he quickly continued with his statement. "There are just too many to chose only one thing... Your eyes are like beautiful crystals, your skin is soft and warm, perfect for late night cuddles." He paused solely to kiss her cheek. "Not to mention, you're intelligent, compassionate, funny when ya' want to be... Protective, strong, outgoin'... Everythin' about you is special."
   "And what about my poor temperament in recent days, my picky nature when it comes to food, or the sheer amount of growth in my stomach that I'm now too heavy and clumsy to get to my feet?"
   "I said everythin', didn't I?"
   For the first time in weeks, she wasn't distracted from her surroundings by her child's movement. This time, it was the other way around. "Yeah... you did..." She looked away suddenly before turning back and kissing him on his lips. She pulled away seconds later, smiling compassionately. "Thank you, Steven..."