Hello & Goodbye (ereri)

Chapter Eighteen

~Eren's POV~

It all felt like a dream. I couldn't even differentiate what was in my head and what was reality any more. It was as if the pain resinating inside my body took over and removed my will to live. It sounds crazy, I know, but that's the only way I could actually explain how I was feeling. Practically nothing. 

All that surrounded me was darkness. Trapped alone in the absence of light unaware of what to do, where to go, or even what to say. It was like someone was calling my name, but it was from miles away. It was nearly an echo. I couldn't identify who was speaking or where they were speaking from. Like I said, trapped in a infinite darkness. 

Alone in my space, the faint beeping resounded everywhere. It was more distinct that the person calling my name. It was rhythmic, a very steady beat to the point were it sounded like a song. A really sad and plain song. 

The beeping became louder and more defined as the once dark room I was in became lighter. I could see my hands. 

Was this all in my head? Or was this reality? That's the question I desperately needed answered right now. 

For a moment, I could feel my own body. The very perimeter of it. I couldn't move, but I could feel my chilling fingertips, my pounding core, and my stupefied toes. Yet my eyes, still closed. The rhythmic beating, still louder than before. And the numbness soon faded. 

The darkness turned to a small light. Like how the sun barely peeks over a horizon in the morning. It had gotten brighter until I saw it: the reality.

The beating I had heard was clearly a vital monitor and the sun-like-experience turned out to be fluorescent lights beaming down on my still body. My eyes slowly opened more to find series of wires hooked up to my arms and a white blanket over me. 

The room was unrecognizable, but it didn't scare me. For some reason, the emptiness I sat through was enough to drain myself of all will. Will to feel something...anything.

Judging by the looks of it, I was in a hospital room. A television was pinned against the upper wall playing some documentary and the window to the right of me showed a starry night. I could see cars miles away driving to who knows. With lights of white and red glowing though the streets, it was peaceful.

My sight lost focus when I noticed my own reflection in the window. My skin looked pale and my eyes looked lifeless. It wasn't surprised still. Finding yourself in a hospital room would make anyone freak out, but not me. 

My chest felt tight after each breath I took. Like someone was pushing down every time I inhaled. Out of instinct I left out a painful cough. The action felt like several needles were piercing through my throat. 

My once cold hand as brought warmth when I slowly glanced to my left. There sat Levi asleep at the foot of my hospital bed holding my left hand tightly. Given by what time it was, he's definitely been here for a while. 

The heat leaving his palm brought back my emotions for once. His presence made me feel as if everything was going to be okay.  

With my right hand, I managed to reach over to him. My fingers ran through his hair, I could tell he hadn't washed his hair in a while despite him being a clean freak. The questions then began to ram my brain the instant I let my arm drop away from Levi.

How long have I been out?

What even happened to me?

Why do I feel so light, yet heavy at the same time?

When did I get here?

Just how?

Staring up the white ceiling panels, my thoughts continued to overflow. However, at the same time, I had no urge to answer them.