Nothing much, just fine, I am doing well.

Part 5

Camila's POV

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Lauren Jauregui hugged me. I feel strange. I feel sparks inside of me lighting up when she hugged me even though I couldn't feel anything even when Brad and their friends beat me up. I couldn't get a grasp of what that feeling might possibly be.

She's been staring at me every chance she gets after what happened in the toilet. I want to know what was going on. I mean she's being real nice to me whenever we are together this week.

I don't know why but even though she bullies me daily before I feel like she is scared of everything including me. Even though to many other people she may look like a jerk, an asshole or a badass, she looks so fragile to me like she was ready to break any moment. It makes me sad inside. I have to resist the urge to want to help her because I know she will not want that and it will just get me the target of even more people. Maybe I am just overthinking things sometimes.

I went to my locker and checked my schedule. As I was walking to my first class all four of the textbooks that I was holding was pushed out of my hand and they landed with a loud thud. I looked up, seeing a familiar sight. Piercing green eyes and a fake smirk.

"Whoops. Sorry about that Canola. Didn't see you there." Lauren snickered, not even bothering to help her. 'Oh..well...there goes my thought about her being nice once in a while.' I sighed. Apparently Lauren heard that and shoved her into the cafeteria where there were many students even though it was almost first period.

"Ahem," Lauren cleared her throat trying to get everyone's attention. As they all turned to look at the two of us, Lauren smirked and sneered, "Hey everyone. Camila here is not only a freak but also fucking dyke. She tried to take advantage of me in the rain and even gave me her stinky ass, old hoodie. But sadly for her, she needs to get her head straight that no one will like her. Ever. Never." By the end of her speech we"d drawn everyone's attention. My heart dropped. 'What the fuck. I have never told anyone that I was gay and I definitely didn't fucking told Little miss Lauren here about it.'

I can't do this anymore.

I felt a sudden rush of anger that I hadn't felt for many years throughout my body. I gripped Lauren's hand that was currently on my shirt. "That's it Lauren. Don't push me any further than this." I growled quietly into her ears before pushing her away harshly. I grabbed my bag that was sitting on the floor and pushed everyone that was in my way to walk back to my shitty home.

On my way back, I had a flash-back about all the events that I had been through all my life. Tears started to spill. I am so glad that the streets were clear. I don't like people seeing me cry. It makes me feel weak and inferior. I don't know what I did to deserve this.

At home, I would always be left to be beaten by my so-called father or left alone in the dark basement every single night when he was not in a mood to deal with me. All I had was a bottle of water. No blankets, no pillows, no lights. Just darkness and fear. I didn't like it the feeling of being trapped alone but I didn't hate it. When I was younger I tried to resist or hold onto myself so that he couldn't hit me that hard but of course that only made him want to hurt me more. There was also a time when I tried to call out for help when I was alone in the basement. That didn't work out well for me either. The basement was still safer than being around other people. The basement was like my own personal space now that my father is no more.

And at school, people would at like immature brats towards me and beat me up behind the school all the time. I was their own personal stress-relief toy that they could hit to make themselves feel better about themselves. I don't even remember when it all started. I used to try to stand up for myself and resist but there were so many people that made me question my own existence every single day. I grown immune to it.

One day I just stopped trying everything altogether in total and shut myself down and away from everyone. I thought I couldn't feel anything anymore but guess what, Lauren proved me wrong today.

I went straight into my room, laid on my bed and stared up at the ceiling. I didn't want to cry anymore. I don't know what I feel right now. I don't know what I want to do. I got questions haunting me.

|Note|

Sorry for not updating the past four days I was extremely busy. I will update tomorrow. Thank you. 😊 

Please don't hate me. T-T I swear I will update tomorrow.