365 days before

352 days before - It's just a tweet.

"I really want to go now." Kat says. "You didn't went to the city for ages.. And I need a dress, you know that."

Of course I know it. Kat's a little bit younger, 16, and isn't in the same school as I am and she has prom in a few weeks.

"Yeaaaaah." I whine, stand up and scuff to the bathroom to put at least a little bit of mascara on. I'm in a state of after shock since the concert and to be honest, as i'm on vacay.. I didn't really got myself to do something meaningful the last days. I'm only either sleeping, eating, watching senseless episodes of my favorite TV shows or tweeting about my boring life. I mean i knew it would be like that. It maybe sounds stupid but the concert was the only thing I looked forward to and now this thing isn't there anymore.

Kat knew it also, she let me have my lazy days, let me whine about my life, listening carefully faithful. But she knows me better than I know myself and she got that she had to force me into going outside. Doing something. Get a sniff. I know that she's right, she always wants the best for me, but at this moment.. I really don't want to. I want to continue my boring life and i'm unbelievable tired. Kat and I had a sleepover last night and while she was sleeping like a baby, I couldn't. My midnight-thoughts just didn't want to stop and there was even a time where I sobbed quietly into my pillow, trying to please not make a sound.

"Ok, i'm good to go." I hum as I step back into my room. "Yay." Kat smiles warmly. I smile back, wanting it to seem real, but fail miserably. I see the worry in Kat's blue eyes, but act like I didn't notice it, snatch my bag, throw it over my right shoulder and walk, Kat by my side, to the next bus stop.

Arriving in the city, we first go to a little bakery to not only buy a coffee but also something to eat. I'm starving myself unintentional , haven't eaten since yesterday. Not that I'm hungry, i'm actually never really hungry, but my body craves food, I can not not eat for a long time without might passing out and no thank you. I'm not thin to my bones or something, I just can't eat much. Kat, who eats a lot more than I do, is thin. But like.. nice thin. She doesn't have a thigh gap and you can't see her hipbones.
She just looks fit. I know her for 9 years now, and I never got in all these years how she can be so incredible disciplined. She always made a lot of sport.
She thinks her legs are too big and that she's too short, when in reality she's one of the most flawless girls out there. I never met a person with such a big heart and I highly doubt that there is anyone who is like her. She's one of these friends who are standing always by your side, hating automatically everyone you hate and knowing in every situation what to say and when to stay quiet. I'm so, so thankful to have her.

We're starting in Forever21 to search for a cute dress, but the ones there are either boring or too colorful. The only nice one isn't available in Kat's size and the texture is prickly.
"I don't think you can wear that" I chuckle when Kat opens the curtain of the fitting room. The dress is so damn big, Kat has to hold it so it won't fall down. "Yeah." She sighs. "I just wanted to give it a try".
The next shop is called "Urban Outfitters" but we both quickly get that you can't buy something chic in here.

7 stores and one elegant one broader, Kat nearly gives up, her always good mood is dropping and she pouts. "I didn't know that it's so difficult to freaking find something pretty which isn't neither way too long, too short, too green, too boring or just too big. I thought it would be easier." I laugh bitterly "Oh Kat, remember the wedding of my aunt Helene? We both searched for a dress for me nearly a week." "Yeah and in the end you just wore an old skirt from your mum, of course I do remember this drama." She replies, convulsing in horror. "Yah, you shouldn't be surprised than." I state. "Aaaand you have a lot of time left." I add.
"Yeah! 2 weeks, thats an amoooooooount of time!" She says sarcastically.
I roll my eyes, grinning. "Oh Kat, don't be so eager, we'll find something for you, I know it."
"I hope so..."