*Author's Note: Hi guys!!! So sorry for the long wait!! Namiss ko si ahia jeric!! And I miss you guys as well.
Will continue this story now. 😊
Via's Pov
'Damn you to hell and back Jeric Allen Uy Teng!!'
I muttered in frustration as I soon as I saw him that rainy evening after my last class for the day.
He was leaning casually outside our classroom making my female classmates swoon in delight and my male classmates looking at him as if he has lost his marbles. Paano ba naman kasi...naka growling tigers basketball jersey 'tong si captain and he looked so calm and at ease inside the archers lair. I shook my head and sighed as I fixed my things ever so slowly not wanting to face the man I loathe outside. Yes loathe, I dont feel anything for him right now but sheer annoyance. Like what the hell is he planning?? I told him about a week ago that I wanted out. I wanted to be free of him while I still can. I am not sure if its my hormones that's doing all this talking about hating him or is it really my heart this time? Have I simply had enough of everything? Of him? Maybe its about time I really focus on myself and love myself and my baby more. I didnt need the added stress in my first trimester of being a mommy but looking at this chinito asshole smiling at his fan girls I certainly want to just leap out of our classroom window to escape him.
Has it been almost 2 months since I found out I was pregnant? I smiled wistfully while holding my tummy. Oh how I cant wait to be a mother and to feel my baby move in me. I can't wait to hold him or her but I was secretly hoping I would have a boy but whatever I am given I will be one happy mommy. I haven't told our families yet with the exception of Achi Alysh, Jeron and Almira. I also made our friends to swear not to tell it to anyone, not until after our graduation ceremony which was happening in about a month's time. I still want to attend our graduation march and if lucky get latin honors and only then will I reveal my pregnancy. The world need not know yet. I am happy keeping this tiny miracle of mine a secret.
'Hey baby...the rain isnt showing any signs of stopping. We need to go.' He said softly as he kissed my forehead 'tara na uwi na tayo?'
I groaned and rolled my eyes 'anong drama 'to?? Tigilan mo ako Jeric Allen ha.' I gathered my things and walked out of the classroom leaving him dumbfounded. It was also a good thing that kami na lang ang naiwan sa hallway. I didnt want to make a scene.
'I am picking you up...what kind of question is that??' He asked and took hold of my arm 'why are you being difficult??'
'Ako? Being difficult? Teka lang ha Jeric Allen...what part of I dont want to be around you is hard to understand?'
He sighed and pouted and I had to stop my heart from melting. I dont want any of this anymore. I have grown tired of waiting for him to grow balls and grow the fuck up to decide what he really wants. My heart simply cannot take it anymore. It doesnt mean I dont love him. I have loved him for so long that it would be difficult to simply remove him from my system but this time I hope he allows me to love myself more and for that I have to distance myself from him. Oo, you heard it right I want to break up. Ang tagal na dapat overdue yung break up namin and I know thats what he wanted when he visited me that fateful night he found out that I was pregnant.
'Dont you love me anymore?' He whispered and touched my cheeks and looked at me with pleading eyes.
I sighed 'what is it this time Jeric? Please stop this nonsense...I am not dying. I am just having a baby and I didnt need the added stress. Kaya please lang tell me what is it that you want? Its not like you suddenly have a change of heart. You're 2 months late. I dont think I can do this anymore.'
I couldnt look at him straight in his eyes for I know I would be in deep shit if I do. I do not want to be swayed anymore. I looked at the falling rain trapping us here in this building. There was a time when everything was perfect that he came rushing to this very same building braving the rain only to come pick me up and take me home. He looked so dashing and I couldnt help but love him even more then. But that was in our not so distant past and I guess it will always remain there. A past that I can look back and learn from.
Our families most especially our mothers are still keen on this marriage even if they know that both Jeric and I are having none of it. A small part of me still wants to be Mrs.Jeric Allen Uy Teng but that is never going to happen. I refuse to believe anymore. Jeric and I are old news and it will never happen. I still worry about his health though and I would always want him to be healthy but I dont want him to feel that he is saddled with me because he needs my blood and that we are both having a baby or he is duty bound to marry me because of a business deal. I dont want to get married for all the wrong reasons but I am not hoping anymore. We both know that we both need to abandon this ship before it destroys us both.
Jeric's Pov
I looked at this pixie standing right beside me looking at the rain. Her eyes showed sadness yet there was determination in them. Gusto na niya akong iwan and who am I to stop that? She was right with all her reasons to want to leave...it isnt enough that we are going to be parents to stay in a relationship that has sank a long time ago and there was no one to blame but myself. I shouldnt have started it knowing I couldnt love her as much as she loves me. I failed her and I failed myself. I closed my eyes and held her free hand and surprisingly she showed no signs of resistance it was as if she was simply letting me hold her for the last time.
Ang tanga tanga ko talaga...I have failed her yet again and I have hurt her far beyond pleasure and to top it all nabuntis ko pa siya. You are such an effin' failure Jeric Allen.
'Dont give up on me yet...'
I whispered to her not caring if other students can see us. Hell I braved being in their turf for this beautiful girl who deserves so much more than my half baked promises and my unsure feelings yet despite all those she chose to stay.
'We were never something to begin with Jeric. Ano ba tayo? I think we pushed it to the point of no return. Tama na Jeric.' She whispered as she held my hand 'someday some other girl will get to hold your hand like this and someday you will be happy.'
'But we're having a baby...you cant just let go. We need to make it work.' I told her. I didnt want my child to grow up without a complete family. I want our baby to have the same thing both Via and I have yet why is she right? 'Are you really ending this here? Can we not try a bit more?'
She smiled and looked at me 'Hey Captain...look at me.' She w5hispered and held my hand tighter.
'We dont have to be together to be the best parents we can be for our baby. I wont hide him or her from you or your family. I am not heartless. But Jeric dont you want a marriage like the ones our parents have? They love each other so much and we dont. I wont tie you or myself in a loveless marriage when we both know we can find love again.' She said as she held my cheek 'lets just end this before we completely destroy each other. You have a whole life ahead of you...our story simply has to end here captain.'
I sighed and stopped myself from crying for I knew she was right but why does it feel so sad? Why do I feel so empty? Every word she has said has merit and she has always looked out for me. Why cant I give her the same thing? Why must I always hurt her? Why cant I give her what she wants?
'But...our parents will have none of that. They would especially want na ikasal tayo now that we are having a baby.' I told her. A part of me still wants to be with her but at the same time I know we both have to let go. It isnt healthy anymore lalo na kay Via. She and my baby needs a healthy environment and I am not helping them get that.
'Dont worry, they will understand. I will talk to them. Make them see our reasons. Dont worry captain...everything is going to be alright.' She said and smiled.
I nodded and hugged her tight not caring if anyone can see us. I just need to hold her and somehow tell her that things will indeed be ok and that no matter what happens I will still be here for her and for our baby. I will miss holding her like this...and yes I will miss her and what we had. It was fun and memorable but Via's right, there is no point in holding on to a relationship if we can no longer fix it.
'Via...I'm sorry.' I whispered in her ear as I pulled her close to me, as close as I can as if I was memorizing how it felt like holding her and how she smells.
She patted my back and hugged me 'captain there's no need to be sorry. We tried. We had a good run but we have to move on.'
I looked at her and saw that she was trying her best not to cry and she was determined to start anew without me.
'I didnt try hard enough...' I said 'I didnt try hard enough for you and our baby.'
She smiled and shook my head as she led me out of their building and into the pouring rain. She smiled as she held my hand and told me without words to let go. Let go of the pain and let go of all that is holding me back.
'For old times sake Jeric...'
she said with that beautiful smile of hers and it made me pray to every saint and every angel above that may our future son or daughter have her smile.
And that very instant I prayed that may she find happiness may it be with me or without me.
