As I walked toward ABS the light seemed to shimmer even more than normal. My smile grows larger with every step. Suddenly I hear a screech and look at Peas. Peas seem very confused before looking at Garbage boy.
"Did you make that noise?" She says. He just shakes his head. No one believes him until the death screech is heard again from above. We stare upwards at the birds.
"The must have come to wish the happy couple a good marriage," The Onecler says. All the birds suddenly take a nose dive into the boat. Peas lets out a scream as the birds slam into the boat.
"We gather here to unite these two people in marriage," The Onceler starts. Peas starts to run away. The birds take a massive dive at ABS who skillfully dogges out of the way. A bird slams into my back and I let out a howl of pain.
The birds seem to be flying in circles around Peas not letting anyone touch her. I notice through the sharp pains of more birds stabbing me that the circle of birds is forcing her to close to the edge of the boat. Every second they move her closer and closer. I scream out her name but it is lost in the squawking.
"Their decision to marry has not been entered into lightly and today they publicly declare their private devotion to each other. The essence of this commitment is the acceptance of each other in entirety, a lover, companion, and friend. A good and balanced relationship is one in which neither person is overpowered nor absorbed by the other, one in which neither person is possessive of the other, one in which both give their love freely and without jealousy. Marriage, ideally, is a sharing of responsibilities, hopes, and dreams. It takes a special effort to grow together, survive hard times, and be loving and unselfish." The Onecler Continues.
ABS's strong THICCCCCKhkhk arms pick me up and protect me from the birds. Peas is growing closer and closer to the edge of the boat. Every second draws her closer to the edge. I don't hear her screaming though. The birds must be drowning it out.
Another bird comes flying down to attack me but ABS bats it away with the swipe of his mighty tail. The Onecler is still completely unaffected by the birds and continues his speech.
"Do you both pledge to share your lives openly with one another, and to speak the truth in love? Do you promise to honor and tenderly care for one another, cherish and encourage each other, stand together, through sorrows and joys, hardships and triumphs for all the days of your lives? " The Oncler looks up just starting to notice the birds. "This is the part where you say I do."
"I do!" I scream and start to make my way over to Peas.
"Ditto," ABS says and bats off a couple of birds.
"No," Screeches the Oncler, "You have to say I do!"
"I do," yells ABS. I reach the side of the storm of birds. Me being there seems to get them even angrier and the move faster around Peas. I can't see her but the storm of birds goes tumbling over the edge of the boat to the water below I let out a scream.
"Do you pledge to share your love and the joys of your marriage with all those around you, so that they may learn from your love and be encouraged to grow in their own lives?" The Oncler says a little confused.
"We do," Say both ABS and me. The birds rise out of the water like a rocket and floating on top of this carpet is Peas screaming.
"WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCKING FUCK." She screams and the birds hold her steady. Garbage boi looks on unaffected. he always takes half damage from bird types
"This is strange." He says. Peas scramble around on top of the birds screaming at them to let her go. The birds hold her steady and act like a conveyer belt and keep her still. All the birds shift around and start to fly away. Peas screeches are very loud. They must have thought she was a bird.
"May these rings be blessed as a symbol of your union. As often as either of you look upon these rings, may you not only be reminded of this moment but also of the vows you have made and the strength of your commitment to each other. "
Peas fling down the onion rings at us. They magically float down onto our fingers. I smile with joy and the Oncler lets out an ungodly scream as birds.
"Blan Blah Blah, Skip a few." The Oncler says. "You may now fuck the bride."
"DON'T!!!" Screeches Peas from the top of the bird Mass. A bird is sitting on top of her shoulder-length hair.
"I got this," The Oncler says. He lets out an ear-splitting screech and the birds fly off dropping Peas on the deck of the boat.
"WHAT THe ACTUAL FUCK!!" Peas yells. I don't hear her. I'm to busy wrapped up in my new hubby's THICK arms.
YOU ARE READING
The Scintillating Viking
Romance*Offensive, Mature themes and jabs at the abusive side of gender roles are common. Beronica was never a slut. She is 100% normal and never slept with anyone. Until a bunch of abs (no we're serious he's just abs, and a dinosaur tail) came along a swe...
