~2 WEEKS LATER~
Three words.
I have been repeating those same three words in my head non stop.
I am pathetic.
Its not that I expected him to turn around in his car and come running back into me. No, I knew as soon as he shut the door behind him that it was over. That we were over.
And soon I will be heading of to boarding school and all I have left of him is memories and photos.
But anyway, back to me being pathetic. Oh yeah, well basically I look a state and pretty much feel a state too.
Katie and even Jimmy tried helping but I shut them out. I of course, pretended everything was fine, that I was fine. As usual I am always pretending.
And I know I am being completely selfish the way I am groping on about myself when I really should be worrying about Katie and her being a newly vamp. But I just cant help it.
I mean, Joshua hasn't once called, visited or anything! Like its not like I was expecting love letters or anything. All I wanted was to know if we were still together! Is that really to much to ask?
And I know its gotta be tough on him. The girl whom he finally got as his girlfriend is leaving to go to boarding school, in IRELAND! And yeah if he didn't think that was tough going then I would of done the breaking up, hassle free.
But think of it for me! I'm. The. One. Who. Is. Moving.
So all in all it is way harder!
Right now, I am lying in bed repeating the same words over and over in my head. I am pathetic. That's all what I have done over the past few weeks.
And do you want to know what the sad part of it is ? Its true. I really am pathetic.
Never have I once thought I, me Hannah would ever deal with a break up like I have been.
And the worse part of it is, I cant help it but to ignore people and I know they are only trying to help.
Like Katie for instance when she said, ' You never know Hannah, maybe things will turn around.' and I thought, what are you talking about?, he never turned back around in his car!
I thought this, didn't say it.
And when Jimmy said, ' I knew this guy was no good!' and I thought, good at what, kissing? Well your wrong Jimmy because he is amazing!
Then that thought sent me straight into tears and Jimmy felt really bad because he thought he had done something wrong.
Oh well I have to admit, my dad most definitely has to be the complete worst when ' trying' to deal with my emotions. But the difference between him and Jimmy and Katie is, he thought I was upset because I was moving. As he said to me earlier today, ' cheer up kiddo! If your lucky, you might even get to learn how to do Irish dancing!' and I thought, well with the luck I am blessed with, I'm sure I will!
I hear the door bell ring and decide to get into the shower. Its probably Jimmy as Katie has to be at work now.
I slowly rinse myself and slowly shampoo and slowly do everything! I'm hoping Jimmy will just give up on me and go home. A girl could only have so much bad luck, right ?
When I was finished getting out of the shower I creped quietly across the landing to my bedroom and hear laughter coming from both parents, meaning Jimmy was still here! Damn, he never knows when to give up!
