CLANDESTINE

trois

3
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violently desperate,
both of us.
_____

it must be one of those days.

that's what donghyuck thought. mark giving him cold shoulder, lack of affection, not even sparing glances to him. donghyuck understand, he gets that a lot.

what he couldn't get was how mark acted totally fine towards others. he was still laughing so hard with the others, throwing jokes here and there with them. in an interview they went to today, despite sitting beside him, donghyuck doesn't really get the attention he wanted from the other boy.

maybe it was obvious at his face and maybe it affected his mood because as they did a live today, it seems the fans had noticed it. the fans pointed out about his lack of interaction with the members but he just smiled, the others making out the reason of him being tired of staying late at night for playing game.

wrong, he slept early last night.

the others didn't know what's going on and honestly, they didn't know what to do. johnny, one that always look out for him, was worried of donghyuck's state.

it was nothing much though, it's just him not getting his boyfriend attention. then again, mark must have know. it would be a damn lie if he didn't and donghyuck knew that. when mark put his hand on donghyuck's thigh, his habit, mark was well aware of his mood.

it was like a comfort, to remind donghyuck that even if his mind was a constant cycle of negativity, mark would be back to him soon.

donghyuck didn't go to mark's room tonight. he thought mark would want some space, he respected that. it was hard to get use to not having arms around him but if mark wanted to be alone then the least donghyuck can do is to give him what he wanted.

he was about to sleep when he felt his bed shifting. it was a tiring day for him that his mind was completely shut off from the world, he don't even notice the door opening. donghyuck contemplated of opening his eyes but he's too tired for it. maybe it's just the members coming to get something.

what he didn't expect was the sudden tugging and within seconds he felt someone's lips on his. it happened so suddenly donghyuck was knocked out from his breath, the drowsiness fading. he was caught off guard at the action and he opened his eyes, only to met an unreadable ones. donghyuck brought his hand to mark's chest, trying to put himself in a more comfortable position. mark could care less though, his mind was a mess and all he can think about was to have the younger boy with him.

it explained the desperation in the kiss as mark pulled donghyuck closer, one hand on his waist, the other on the younger's cheek. the sparks around them intensified, the electricity sort of rush seeping deeply as the raw and passionate kiss deepened. donghyuck wouldn't want to let go but he was running out of breath. he tried to push the other boy but it was to no avail. mark's grip on him tightened as his hands went to get donghyuck's wrists and put it on top of his head, locking him from moving.

"m-mar-" only when he was about to take a breath, he was back into it. mark bit donghyuck's lower lip, resulting a whine from the boy as the pain hit him.

"stop-"

donghyuck was getting breathless and he was so close to unconsciousness. it was too much for him. everything was so intense, so fierce, agonizingly fervent. it was a profound pleasure that heightened his adrenaline, blurring his sight until it was concentrated on the pair of lips stealing every little breath of his over time slowly.

he let out some sort of a forced plea in the back of his throat. only then the boy on top of him finally retreated, his sweaty forehead resting against donghyuck's. the grips on him loosened and donghyuck quickly brought his hand to cupped mark's face.

"what's wrong, mark?"

donghyuck looked at his eyes, hoping to find anything inside it but he can't. mark's eyes was waves of colours mixing together, swirls of emotions dancing, clouds of lust overpowering and hiding the true meaning of it.

"i love you."

even with them catching their breaths, donghyuck heard that perfectly. it was normal to hear it but he didn't know why tonight, it sounds so special and deep for him. mark eyes was watering and truthfully, donghyuck didn't know what to do. he don't know why the boy was acting like that. donghyuck just gave him a last peck before standing up to locked the door before quickly having his body within the other.

"i love you so damn much it hurts. i'm sorry if i ignored you today, i'm just, i wasn't-"

mark was cut off his sentence as donghyuck hugged him. "i know mark, i know. it's okay. i understand." to be honest, it does hurt donghyuck but what's important right now is not him, it's mark. mark was not being himself and donghyuck can't be selfish and think of his own importance. mark needs him.

"i love you too."

he said before closing his eyes, mark's head on his chest. donghyuck can heard the other began to breath in a steady mode and in seconds, he was asleep.

donghyuck smiled. if the world wasn't against them, he would gladly tell the world about how precious his boyfriend is. well maybe next time, when his country starts to be more open-minded.

right now, mark was all he need.