-Home- [Kim Doyoung]

Chapter 2 - oblivion

Ok, so I really thought that this boy sitting next to me looking all cute and trendy was, I quote myself, "boyfriend-material", HOWEVER, he seems to be a gangster. Life why are you doing this to me. Also who is this Johnny guy and why did he go to jail. I need answers. 

The boy, whose name is "Doyoung" as I've just found out, continues to text this Johnny person not minding anything that happens around him, including me. Welp. But honestly I'm glad he didn't notice me. I know that might be just a guess or figment of mine, but I feel like there's happened something between us. Maybe we were lovers in our last lives, maybe we were like Bonnie & Clyde or something like that. But then again this is just a simple guess of mine, who knows what exactly is the reason for that. Perhaps I'm just overanalyzing everything and he actually cried because he lost his wallet or something like that ahhah. But then again he seems to be a delinquent so why would he cry because of something like that. And with that I don't mean that "boYS dOn'T cRY", no, I'm a psychology major and I'm woke. 

Just when I was about to end my internal soliloquy, Doyoung suddenly got up and exited the train. I don't know which kind of power made me do that or maybe I'm just plainly dumb, but I jumped up, as well, and decided to run after him. (his legs are like 10 miles long, chasing after him was e x h a u s t i n g). So here I am now running after a guy who has never talked to me as if he was my key to life. What exactly happened I just wanted to buy some groceries and now I'm stalking a hot guy. Nina, you need to get your life together. 

I continued with the stalking anyway. 

Doyoung just keeps on looking at his phone so this whole stalking thing was kind of boring. I mean I'm not doing it to get caught, but I want to see some delinquent-action :( I sacrificed my valuable free time for this!!! I could be eating a selfmade half-burnt burger right now! (Also why did he get up so early he could have gotten up at least 2 stations later. 

Like this I trail behind him for at least 30 minutes without anything special happening. Doyoung's still staring at his phone, maybe he's searching for some place and therefore uses google maps, and I chase after him. I know I've mentioned that I still have some self-respect but it seems like this bit is now gone, too. At least, even though I might be doing something morally wrong, I'm doing it well. 

Luckily I am doing it so well...

Still completley focused on Doyoung , I've noticed that he approaches a red light very very very fast. Fast as in he would cross the streets without waiting for the light to get green. Boy, even a country pumpkin like me knows that you have to wait when there's a red light. I'm still a bit indecisive about whether I should just blow my cover and stop him from getting run over by a car or...ok no, it's obvious what a good human being should do in a situation like this. 

Without hesitation I take five big steps forward and grab his wrist making him lose his balance. I mean it was obvious that this would happen when I grab his wrist with such a force. Why didn't I think before acting. I could have just said something like "stop". Nina, why are you like this?

It's as if everything from then on happens in slow motion. With my eyes wide open I watch him being turned around by my own movement. Our eyes soon meet and that's when time really seems to stay still. As I stare into his brown, almost black eyes a sudden warmth surrounds me. All these times when I saw him before, I only felt this dark aura surrounding him. But now as we are maybe only inches apart, he suddenly feels so warm. It's not because of his warm, dark brown eyes. It's everything relating to him. The way he stares at me, the way he doesn't seem to feel uncomfortale, no, right now he looks so at ease. Do you look at a stranger like this? 

I really want to deny it, but right now I feel at ease, as well. Somehow all the stress, the worries, even every thought about the current weather is gone from my mind. There's just a comfortable silence in my head. It's been a while since I've felt like that. No, honestly, I don't remember ever feeling this much at ease. How can this be? Why exactly now? 

Just when these thoughts cross my mind, this hypnotizing calm suddenly leaves my mind which makes me able to fully grasp the situation again. I'm about to fall on the to the groud with an at least 1,5 heads taller man falling onto me, too. Wow, this will hurt. 

I quickly shut my eyes and prepare mentally for the upcoming pain. This'll leave some bruises. 

Surprisingly, the impact wasn't too painful. A bit taken aback I open my eyes again making me see something that I really didn't expect to ever see in my life. I'm on top of this boy, Doyoung, both of my hands in his with just inches between his and my face. 

How would a normal human being react in this situation? Well, one would stand up quickly, help the other and ask him whether he's okay or received any injuries due to the impact and then apologize multiple times. 

Right? 

RIGHT? 

SO WHY DON'T YOU GET UP, Nina?!

I don't know what exactly this is but I'm kind of stunned ??? Not because this whole situation is messed up, but rather because of Doyoung himself. There's something about him that feels familiar to me even though he is not more than a stranger, whom I've seen on the subway.  Even the warmth of his hands somehow feels familiar. But there's no way we know each other. Is my intuition lying to me? Can that be? 

"Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry. I saw you crossing the streets and there was a car so I kind of panicked and yeah that's how we ended up like this, I'm so sorry!", I eventually say after getting ahold of my mind again.

I hurriedly try to get up but fail miserably as something is holding me dow...his hands. He doesn't let me let go of his hand. Confused and surprised, I avert my gaze from our hands and immediately meet his eyes. My gaze meets his dark brown eyes. However, I can't read anything into hs gaze. He doesn't look angry, nor does he look sad. As an psychology student, I usually am able to guess how a person is feeling just through their facial expression, but in his case, it's just as if there's an error in my brain. My mind is completely empty. 

And like this seconds, maybe minutes or even hours pass with just me and him staring at each other. It's strange. Totally strange. I don't even know how to describe this feeling. It's as if I've found what I've lost long time ago. However, there's no euphoria. In fact, I feel sad. Many different kinds of sadness at the same time. Why am I like this.?

"Raindrop.", the boy suddenly says in a monotone yet soothing voice. 

As soon as this word left his lips, realization hit me. It's starting to rain.