Adaptation

Chapter 8

As I start to come too again I can hear voices and I think it's Andy so I mumble "Andy". Next thing I know Ant runs up to me and he says "baby girl it's me Ant are you OK"? I look at him then at Tim and I scream as I see my ex-boyfriend in front of Tim.

Next thing I know Tim takes him out of the room and Ant pulls me into his arms. As he explains that Tim has taken him away I pull myself closer to him and put my head in his neck breathing in his familiar scent that I have already grown accustomed too. I just cry because I don't want to have to deal with my ex- boyfriend when my boyfriend should really be here with me.

I pull away and say "where's Andy"? Ant looks at me and says 'he couldn't come over so sorry baby girl I tried but he said he couldn't. I scream and cry as if he did really love me then he would have made the time. Ant pulls me into his arms again and says "Come on baby girl you need to settle down I know it's not fair but that's something we have to deal with when you are on tour especially a big tour like he has". Tim walks back in the room and says "he is gone and won't be coming back I have made sure that we have security sat outside the room at all times". He comes over and gives me a hug and says "you feeling better baby girl"? I nod my head and look at my hands and I feel 2 pairs of hands on mine and they say "it's OK to be sad or upset or angry we get that but we have to deal with it and we will help you deal with it". I look up at him and just say "Andy". He looks at me and squeezes my hand and then says "we are here for you baby girl". I plaster a smile on my face and put my head back as I'm still sleepy so they both sit either side of my bed and one of their hands holds mine and the other holds each other's over my bed. I dose back to sleep as I can't keep my eyes open and when I wake up again the room is dark and I can barely make out Tim and Ants silhouettes. They are asleep in each other's arms on the lounge they have in my room Ant just sitting in Tim's lap like he does at home. Ant has no shame he will plant himself on his husband anywhere. I used to hate it but now I think it's sweet that they have the kind of love that they do. They are both lucky and I wish that I had it too but it's the story of my life. I fall back asleep again and the next time I wake up Ant is not in the room only Tim.

When Tim looks up at me and sees me awake he comes over and says "how are feeling baby girl"? I smile at him and say "heaps better thank you. I don't want to ask this but I need to know what happened to me? The last I remember is taking the pills and sending Andy a message". He pulls me into his arms and says "Andy rang Ant and said that you sent him a message and when he tried to ring you, you didn't answer so Ant went up to your room and just yelled out to me to call an ambulance. I did then went up and saw you lying on the bed. Let me tell you though you scared us both". I nod my head and say "where is Ant"? He looks at me and was about to respond when Ant walks back through the door with 2 coffees, I should have guessed. I laugh and say to Tim "never mind I should have guessed that's where he would be". Tim laughs as well and Ant says "what did I miss"? I look at him and say "I just asked Tim where you were but I should have guessed you never go a day without coffee". We all laugh and if feels so good to be laughing with them both again. I missed it.

The day wears on with just the 3 of us in the room with a nurse occasionally coming in to check my obs. Just after lunch which was steamed fish but I didn't eat it a doctor walked in and read my chart and says to me "if you keep this up you go home the day after tomorrow but you need eat before I will release you and I also want start you on medication to help with your depression". Ant sits on the side of my bed and he says to the doctor "thanks doc I will make sure she takes them each day. Is there any special food that she has to eat or can she eat anything as my husband just went to get some lunch for us and I will ring him and get him to get something for her if she can eat anything"? The doc says "no she can eat whatever". Ant pulls his phone out as the doctor walked out and I heard him say it's me babe can you get a large nugget meal for Addie to please because they want her to eat and I know it's her favorite". He smiles and then says "thanks babe love you to". I look over at him and say "tell me how you and Tim met". Ant sat on the edge of my bed and said "well we met when he was on Dancing with the stars but I never knew he was gay. We became friends and once I realized he had the same feeling for me that I had for him we decided to take it slow because of our careers but that only lasted like 2 months and we bought our house together not long after that and we decided to get married in 2014. I didn't want kids but all that changed after I met you and I knew I wanted to look after you so I spoke to Tim and together we decided that we would adopt you and after many calls to Andy after we started meeting up with you every week we got you from that refuge and you know the rest. I'm lucky to have you and Tim in my life. I really love you both so much and I don't know what I would do without both of you". I can't help the tears that come to my eyes as he says that and I lunge at him and throw my arms around him. He pats me on the back and says "its OK baby girl don't cry". I look at him and I know then that I love them both as well and I decide that I will start calling them Dad. I was just about to say I love you too dad when Tim walked through the door and I decide I will tell them both. I hold my hand out to Tim and he comes and sits on the other side of my bed and I look at them both and say "I love you both too so much and I want to thank you for what you have done for me over the past couple of months. I am glad that you are my fathers. So thank you so much Dad for what you have both done". Tim and Ant both have tears in their eyes and they let them fall and Tim leans into me and says I love you too baby girl and I love you to babe so much.

We pull apart to eat lunch and after that Tim goes and sits with Ant and pulls him into his lap where they Ant puts his arms around him and he looks into Tim's eyes and says "I love you so much and thank you for agreeing to adopt Addie". Tim looks at him and says "babe I love you so much too and you don't need to thank me for wanting what's best for my family. I love you both so much".

The day wears on until night falls and I battle to keep my eyes open. I fall asleep just as Tim and Ant move to get more comfortable and they sit by my bed and we all hold hands in a circle.

The next morning I'm woken up by a voice saying"I didn't think you were coming"? I then hear another voice say I kept thinking about it and I couldn't not come I love her so much and she has made this tour bearable for me talking to her every day or whenever we could". I recognize that voice and I open my eyes slowly and see Andy standing on one side of my bed while Ant had moved over to his husbands lap again. I mutter Andy and he looks at me and says "hey baby how are you"? I look at him and grab his hand  and say "I'm OK what are you doing here"? He sits on the bed beside me and he says "I was worried about you so I told my management that I was cutting tour short by 3 weeks as I really needed to get to my girlfriends bed side that was sick in hospital. I couldn't not come and see you. I was so worried that I couldn't focus on my concerts or anything. I forgot words to songs and everything and everyone noticed it". He leans down to hug me and I breathe in his familiar smell. I hear movement in the room and I break away and look up at Tim who is stood at the end of my bed and he says "we are going to get coffee OK we won't be long. Do you both want one"? I nod then look at Andy and he says"if you don't mind that will be great. I haven't slept in like 24 hours. As soon as my plane landed in Sydney I grabbed a rental car and drove all the way here only stopping for fuel and rest stops I really needed to get here to make sure she was OK". Tim nods his head and gently squeezes my foot letting me know silently that they won't be long and to take it easy. They walk out and Andy leans back down to kiss me and he says "I'm glad you're OK even though Anthony kept me informed I was still worried about you so much. Please remember that I love you so much and I can't lose you. You had me so scared that I would get here and you would be dead that I would never see your beautiful eyes again". I nod my head and say to him "I love you too. I'm sorry for what I did it all just became too much for me. I saw Anthony get spooked after the tour at Manly as he hates it that sort of thing but did it anyway to make me happy. Then as we went through it I saw a hand in front of me. Then when we got home I felt like someone was around me but I couldn't see anything. It just all piled on top of me and I couldn't cope and you were away and I didn't want to disturb you I'm sorry". I can feel the tears that were in my eyes start to fall and he brings his hand up to wipe them away. He sits down on the side of my bed and pulls me into his arms and we just sit there cuddling for a while until the doctor from yesterday walked in and says "oh sorry didn't realize you had company I thought your fathers were in here. Andy gets up and introduces himself and the doctor says "nice to meet you I'm Doctor Dean". Andy sits back down then pulls me into his arms again. The doctor checks me over and says "OK I think you can go home tomorrow but I will be giving your fathers your stronger medication and they will give it to you each morning". I nod my head and say "OK thank you".