Digital Souls | Running Away From Love: The Prodigy

All I Want

KATANA

I opened the gift from Katalina. It was her old diary that Rhoni and I used to write things in for her. Attached, was a charm bracelet from Tiffany's. She had the same exact bracelet on her wrist. She linked the bracelet around my wrist and smiled.

"Ohh it's beautiful, Kat." I said gratefully. I hugged Kat and adjusted my new bracelet.

"Read the book when you get a chance alone, today." She smiled. I looked at her puzzled. You've never written in this, Kat." I said.

She smiled proudly, "I know." She pointed at the book and raised her brows, "Put it away."

When I had a moment alone, I went into the large guest room where Jason had stayed when we came for Thanksgiving. I sat at the vanity chair that was against the wall by the bed. I opened up the Diary and flipped through the pages of everything that Rhoni and I had written in. I laughed at the memory of the things we wrote on those pages about boys, crushes, and mean things we thought about Kat's boyfriends. There was something I wrote in a few of the pages when I was in high school. I questioned about why boys do things and why they make girls cry. I remember that exact day I wrote that.

I had just gotten home from going to the homecoming game with Rhonda. I was starting to go out with Ryan Williams that week. The whole school knew we were starting something. When I showed up at the game, Rhonda and I; in fact, the entire Dove Hill High community saw Ryan making out with Geraldine Paladino. I watched her walk up to him and when he turned around, they talked for a while. They started kissing, and then he grabbed her hand, and walked off to the parking lot with her. As soon as that happened, I felt a million eyes shift on me. All I could do was play it cool until the very moment I walked into my sisters room.

I laughed and shook my head at the memory. I started turning more of the blank pages.

..and then..

I found the page that Kat had written in.

My Dearest Tana Tana,

Since I've started Chemo, I've realized how much starting a family means to me. I get scared at times, everyday, that my body isn't strong enough to take each session. Everyday, Mark reminds me that I am strong, and I will beat and overcome this.

It takes everything that I trust in my heart, to believe him. He is trying his best as a husband to make sure that I am okay. Not just physically, but mentally too. I get frustrated with him at times because I feel like he is trying too hard. I have to stop and remind myself, that I am somebody that he doesn't, and cannot lose.

Mom and Dad keep asking for grandchildren, and I am learning to try my best to get through this chemo, the best way I know how.

Tana, I am sisterly serious with all of the energy my life is giving me with what I am about to write. Please don't be afraid of Jason. I know you hate the fact that he is rich. There is something that he has to offer you that isn't money, and he does. Don't push that away.

I noticed something small that said a million words. You call him 'Jase', when you're being kind and friendly. You call him 'Jasey', when you're being playful. You call him 'Jason', when you're being serious. You call him 'Shinzo', when you're being loving and affectionate with him. I've still have yet to hear you call him 'Lew'. But that's an inevitable feeling you will have to let sneak through, when you least expect it. And when it does, I advise you with all of the trust in your heart, not to run away from it.

When Kenny said that Jason is head over heels for you, and didn't say anything snide about it, that's saying a lot in itself.

Dad is the type to tell a person to stay away from his daughters. Did he?