Insatiable

Prologue

"3-2-1-GO!" Kayla yells to us. We begin our pyramid, me taking the base. "Smile, girls!" She demands. Kayla is our head cheerleader. She is a total hardass on us and we have strict rules to follow to keep our place on the squad. "Haley, tighten your core. Tiffany is too low." I stiffen my back and lift the girl higher. "Looking good, Camila. Down, girls. Let's go over our routine for tonight one more time and then we can hit the showers before school starts." She instructs. Across the field, my brother Isaac races after a football. He tackles and jumps over other players on his team and races towards the field goal. We go through our routine again and finish off in splits and basic stunts. "Good work girls. Haley, may I speak with you for a moment?" Oh no, here we go again.

"Yeah, K?" I ask her, sucking in my stomach hoping it goes unnoticed.

"I've just noticed that you aren't as fit as the other girls. I've asked you to improve and diet more but it's like you don't want to listen. You are our best dancer but you just don't look right." My face falls further at her words. I've been trying so hard to lose the weight.

"I'm trying, K. Please just give me more time," I beg. Look at how low I am willing to go.

"I'm not cutting you, yet. But you have to prove your worth here. You are senior varsity now. We are the best of the best. You have to prove that you belong here." She warns me. I nod and cover my stomach with my arms.

"Of course, K" I nod.

"Good talk. Now, go shower." She shoves me toward the locker room. My practice uniform peels off of me because of the sweat and I pull the curtain close to shower in privacy. I dry off and pull on my skinny jeans and white tee and start to do my hair and makeup before the school day starts. I've always hated morning practices. Especially since we have practice after school too and a game tonight.

"What did Kayla want?" My best friend Camila comes up behind me as I am walking to my first period.

"Just my weight. No big deal." Camila gives me a sympathetic sigh but before she can begin talking, my brother joins us.

"Hey, baby sis." He greets, throwing an arm around my shoulder. "You guys are looking really good. Keep it up and we may win tonight." He laughs. "Wanna grab breakfast with me? My treat?" He urges.

"I'm fine actually. I ate before we left." I lie. "I'll take a juice, though." He sighs, knowing I didn't actually eat but goes to grab some biscuits and my juice from the cafeteria. However, before he gets there, he runs into none other than Shawn Mendes, the resident punk leader.

"Out of my way, punk." My brother spits. Our whole group of populars hates the punks with a passion. They walk around like they own the place but that title belongs to us and everyone but them knows it.

"Make me, asshole," Shawn growls to Isaac. My brother's knuckles flex but Shawn doesn't back down. I cringe when a few of the guys from the team join Isaac but Shawn isn't alone either.

"Come on, guys. Fuck off, Shawn." I snap, pulling my brother away. We have known Shawn and his group since kindergarten and we have hated them for just as long. On the playground, Shawn and his friends would be the ones eating mud and throwing rocks at us. My friends and I had on our nice clothes, dresses, and little-pleated pants and we would go home with them dirty and Isaac and I would have to hear mom fuss about cleanliness. As we got older, we would fight back when they attacked us. They were having fun and didn't mind the dirt but we are too good for it. Now, my brother and his friends throw up dirt when their cleats enter the ground, but we are still too good to play in their dirt. Shawn and his friends are scum. And I have to share a lab table with him.

"Princess coming to save the knight, is it? That's cute but we all know he's a little more to you than your brother." Shawn smiles sweetly. I grimace. My brother and I are close, but not THAT close.

"Really? Because I'm her boyfriend. You aren't seen with anyone. Then again, who would be with you?" Brett snickers, taking my hand. His hand is sweaty but I let him hold me close.

"Some boyfriend. How many other girls are you with besides her? Let's see, we have Kayla, Tiffany, Amber, Brianna, Camila, Christin and just about every other girl in the school." Shawn smirks. I look at Brett but he is too busy defending his pride.

"I love Haley. You need to check yourself before insulting me." I feel my heart lift a little but the doubt is still there. I've always doubted his loyalty since we got together. That's why I won't have sex with him.

"Whatever. See you later, Haley." He grins when Isaac starts to jump him but Jason and Mark holds him back. Brett holds my arm a little too tightly when we walk to first. He kisses my lips but his are slimy. He tells me he loves me and I say it back because I do love him, I think. I cruise through first period easily and I avoid everyone in my group on my way to second besides Camila.

"Hey. How are you?" She asks me as we sit down.

"I'm fine. Why?"

"Just wondering. I didn't see you after this morning and I was worried." She shrugs. My best friend would never hurt me by sleeping with my boyfriend. I should have never doubted her. She cares too much about me.

"Yeah, I'm good. Brett just walked me to first." I say. She nods and I get to work on the assignment while she doodles on her paper. She is super talented at drawing. This time she has drawn our pyramid from earlier. When the bell rings for my third period, I groan. It's Anatomy and I have it with Shawn. "See you at lunch, C." I wave. She smiles brightly and heads to art while I walk into Anatomy. I take my seat next to the wall and put my earbuds in until the second bell rings and Shawn slides in last minute.

"Shawn Mendes, why were you almost late?" Our professor Mr. Jeffers points to the tattooed boy. Shawn's short sleeves are rolled up to his big shoulders and I can see the little sparrow on his hand, the guitar of trees on his arm, and the lightbulb with flowers on his shoulder. Why would anyone want to mar their body like this? Even if they are beautiful...

"Sorry, sir. Busy." He coughs. As he falls into his seat, he nudges me by accident.

"Watch it, Mendes." I snap.

"Bite me." He rolls his eyes.

"Today we will be going over the neck and trunk of the body. Can someone show me where the trunk begins and ends?" Mr. Jeffers ask, looking for eager hands to answer his question. He'll be looking for a while because right now, some perv in the back thinks the trunk is his penis. "Put that away, Ken. You don't want to repeat this class for the fourth time, do you?" He threatens. Ken stutters.

"Sir, the trunk is the abdomen, chest, and back if I'm not mistaken," Shawn speaks up from beside me. I gape at him. I never knew he could be smart. I thought mud consumption killed brain cells.

"Very good, Shawn. Here." He tosses Shawn a peppermint from the candy dish for students who do good things and Shawn catches it with ease. "This is a worksheet that will require a little research. I will allow you to have one tablet per table. You are to label the neck and trunk area and find facts about it with your partner. I have a faculty meeting to attend so my assistant will be in here for the class period to make sure you are working."

"Here." I look up to Shawn in question. He has the little peppermint extended to me.

"Does my breath stink or something?" I pout.

"No. I just don't really like these. They have the cinnamon in it. He stole them from taco bell anyway." He smiles. I cautiously take the mint from him and pop it into my mouth.

"Thanks," I mumble.

"So this is the neck. This is the collarbone, chest, torso or abdomen, and this arrow is to the back. That's not hard but we will have to find the facts about it online. All I know is the sexual aspects of them." He winks and gets up to get a tablet as I scowl at his filth.

"What do you mean "the sexual aspects"?" I ask with a frown.

"You know, like hickeys and biting and nipples and girls love my abs." He smirks. I wince. How would he know all of that? It's basic knowledge for a teenager I guess but still.

"Gross."

"You don't like that stuff?' He asks curiously.

"I don't know but even if I did, it's none of your business." I look away, a blush forming on my face. He shakes his head but a smile plays at his lips. "It says the neck supports the brain sensory organs, nerves, and blood vessels of the head and protecting these structures from mechanical damage. It also helps with movements like yes and no and eating and speech." I recite and he writes it down. I begin to tell him about the collarbone and then we switch to where he is reading and I am writing.

"Guys, you can head on to lunch." The assistant calls, not looking up from her phone.

"Tell your brother to back off," Shawn calls to me as I am leaving. I turn around to face him.

"You need to stay in your own territory," I reply. "The cafeteria is ours."

"So I can't eat during school hours because of this stupid feud?" He scoffs.

"Just stay away from us and there won't be any problems." I sigh.

"Hard to do when we have a lab together."

"I know." I agree.

"You and I get along pretty well, Haley." He points out. He's not lying. We don't usually fight when I'm away from the others.

"That's because no matter what, I'm stuck with you here." I snap and walk away, leaving him behind. Lunch goes swimmingly. Everyone is hyped about the game tonight and Jason, from the football team, is throwing a massive party if we win.

"You have to come, Haley!" Camila cheers, shaking my arm with excitement.

"I don't know. I just don't like parties. You guys will leave me alone and you know I'm not a drinker." I sigh.

"No, I won't. I promise. Just come, please." She begs. She said that last time and ended up in some guy's lap while I waited in the car to leave.

"Fine, but I'm counting on you to keep me out of trouble." I joke, knowing I'm not going to do anything reckless. It's just not in me. I finish out my day and switch back into my uniform after fifth period for one more practice before the game.

"Guys, I want to land these stunts tonight. I need you all to be prepared to do whatever it takes to help the team win. Smile, Amber. More makeup, Bri. Higher, Jess. Come on, we are better than this." Kayla snaps, pointing out every flaw in our structure. She doesn't have to be in any of the stunts because she doesn't want to possibly get hurt. All she has to do is snap orders. "Haley, you're slipping."

"Sorry, K." I submit, pushing the girl on my shoulder higher.

"Better. Get into your game uniform. The game starts in an hour. Make sure you look worth the team." She demands. I love cheering but she makes me want to break my legs so that I don't have to put up with it anymore. Still, I wash off my face and slip into the short blue skirt rimmed with white and gold and Cam zips the back of my white and blue top. I do my makeup, lining my green eyes with gold glitter and highlighting my pale face in gold. I put on coral lipstick and pull my hair up in a half ponytail. As I am finishing up, I peak out to see that the stadium lights are already lit up and the stands are full of fans with signs and store-bought pom-poms. I look at my set of pom-poms proudly. "Lace up your shoes, girls. We are about to open the show." Kayla informs. I do as I'm told and lace up my all white tennis shoes and I line up with the rest of the girls. We are introduced and we run on the field holding hands to signal unity. The familiar music starts to play and some of the girls flip out to the edge of the group. We hit every stunt like our life depends on it and when it's time for the boys to be released, I can tell how proud of me Isaac is and it makes my heart swell. Our mom and dad always show us the support we need but sometimes it's good to feel it with one another. In the end, Isaac is my best friend first. We take our places on the sideline, doing random cheers and shouting at every score. I can't believe it but we are in the lead with only minutes left on the board. The boys seem to know this because they play as hard as they can for the remaining seconds and the crowd erupts into a stampede when the scoreboard sounds, signaling the end of the game. I can't make out what anyone is saying over the continuous screaming from both the crowd and the boys. Kayla reminds us all to leave on our uniforms for the party and I cringe. I don't like wearing this skimpy thing for games, let alone out. The skirt comes just to the bottom of my ass and the open neck at the top before the sleeves start shows off all the skin between my two shoulders and swoops down in the back and front, exposing my back and collarbones. I think back to what Shawn said earlier and a smile slips onto my face.

"Why are you smiling? Are you happy that we won?" Camila asks, bouncing over to me in the locker room.

"Yeah, C." Nope, but it doesn't matter.

"Me too! And I am so excited for this party." She giggles, fixing her makeup and blotting her skin with an oil wipe. I do the same for the sweat on my nose. "Come, on. Let's meet your brother at the truck." She beams. I look at my reflection in the mirror before leaving. My skin is too pale for this skirt. I look splotchy. "You look fine. Let's go." She drags me to the truck my brother and I share. It works out pretty good that we share a vehicle since we always have practice at the same time and my friends are his friends, but sometimes I wish I could have one to myself so on nights like tonight, I can just go home.

"Hey, baby sis. Why do you look so glum?" Isaac calls, catching up to us before we reach the red pickup.

"I wanna go home," I whine. He smiles softly.

"I can take you home. We can have a movie night instead of some stupid party. Just like old times?" He offers. Still, I can't bring myself to agree when one of his football friend's yells to him about how pump he is for the party. This is for Isaac. The party is for him. Not me.

"No, Isaac. It's cool. I can handle a party. But tomorrow, we are doing that movie night. Harry Potter marathon." I declare, hopping into the middle seat between Isaac and Camila.

"You got it, sis." He smiles widely, obviously happy with my choice. I couldn't just take that away from him. We pull up to the curb in front of a house with music blaring and cups already littering the yard, no doubt containing beer. Camila grips my arm as we enter the foggy house. She is holding me in excitement but I am holding her in fear. Why does it have to be so foggy? So smelly? Why are bodies already gyrating on the floor? It's only nine.

"Isaac! Over here!" Jason calls from the backyard. Isaac doesn't think twice about leaving to join his friends.

"Let's get a drink," Camila suggests, dragging me to the kitchen where a table full of beer and liquor is. She hands me something in a mason jar smelling highly of alcohol and cinnamon. "Drink this. I want this one." She declares, grabbing a red cup and pouring her something strong. I sniff my jar again and grimace. Do I really want to drink this?

"Haley, babeeee." Brett slurs, putting a drunken arm around my waist and pulling me close, trying to bite my ear. The answer to my question is yes. I really do want to drink it. The alcohol burns but I brave through half the jar in one quick gulp. Brett smiles and starts to touch above the waistband of my skirt but I shove him off. "Bitch." He murmers and sways off into the sweaty crowd.

"I promised Abby that I would hang out with her at this party since she's new. I'll see you later." Camila waves.

"But you pro- woah." I stumble, a strong wave of dizziness taking over me.

"Easy there." A strong laugh comes from behind me and arms circle my waist once again, but these are more gentle and less invasive. Safe. I tip back the rest of the drink carelessly. I turn to face my savior but am shocked to see a very drunk Shawn instead of some shining knight. Still, inhibition fails me as the alcohol hits me again. I smile lazily.

"Dance with me," I demand with a pout. He doesn't object and drags me to the edge of the dance floor. My body feels heavy but he holds me up with his strong arms and I can't bring myself to hate him in this moment when his forehead is pressed to mine and we are grinding shamelessly. I trip over my own body again and fall into his chest. We both giggle.

"Let me help you." He whispers, leading me to a hallway to lean me against a wall.

"How will we dance out here?" I whine weakly.

"Like this." He sways my body with his and kisses my jaw sloppily. I turn my head to make it easier. Why am I doing this again? I forget but I can't be bothered to care when his lips trace to my neck. I remember what he said earlier about the sexual thing and it does feel good. Is this Shawn? Abs. Girls like his abs. I put my burning hands under his shirt and he groans. I do like his abs. His lips find mine through the thick smoke and I kiss him back. He holds my head close and I push my hands through his hair. Soft, like a puppy. I like puppies. I giggle again and he smiles against my lips. His lips are so soft. Another drunken couple comes crashing into us and he falls flush against me with a laugh.

"In here," I whisper, turning an unlocked door knob. We stumble into the darker room and he pushes me back onto the mattress behind us. I drag him on top of me and he sighs, fitting perfectly between my legs. His hand slips under my shirt and I jerk, not used to the feeling. I never have been touched like this. I don't let Brett anywhere close to this. He doesn't feel worth it. But right now, at this moment, Shawn feels absolutely right. His breath lingers with mine and he kisses me harder than before, but still so good. He starts to kiss roughly down my jaw and to my neck, nibbling here and there and causing me to moan.

"Is this ok?" He asks me, tugging at the waistband of my skirt. I nod. "Say it." He mumbles against my lips.

"Yes. K-keep going." I stutter. He grins and unzips the side of the skirt. He drags it slowly down my legs. My black panties appear in his view. I pull him back up to kiss me and I feel him straining against his tight jeans. I fumble with the button and it finally releases and he pulls them down fast, leaving us in our underwear and shirts, but I want to see those abs he was talking about, the ones I was feeling moments ago. Every touch of his feels elevated because of the alcohol but I'm starting to think I'm drunk on Shawn and not whatever liquor I drank. I tug his shirt over his head and stare at the toned abdomen in front of me with awe. He feels so smooth. "More," I beg. He complies. His hands roam my body, feeling everything no one else has. He grips my hip and I buck to meet his fingers. His hazel brown eyes are full of lust just for me and I can't help but feel proud. I have Shawn Mendes wanting my body. We hate each other but he wants to touch me. He tears my panties off, ripping the thin black fabric from my body. He pulls his underwear down fast and I am left gaping at him. I've never seen one in real life before. It's... scary and intriguing. I take it into my hand and he moans low and deep. I take that as my queue to keep going and I lick the tip. He whines, pushing my head closer to it. I must have lost my mind somewhere out of this room because I take it all in my mouth willingly. He pulls out from my lips and shoves me back aggressively. He crawls on top of me and parts my other lips, feeling the wetness slipping through the folds.

"Is this too far?" He asks, holding the tip at my entrance.

"Yes, but it's alright. I want it." I admit. He doesn't have to be told twice because he pushes all the way in and I throw my head back, gripping the sheets from pain.

"You're okay, babygirl." He whispers soothingly, kissing my lips sweetly to distract me from where he starts to move. I believe him when he says I'm okay and that may be stupid but I let him carry me through my high for what seems like hours. And I carry him through his shamelessly. I moan loudly for him as I reach my climax and he bites my shoulder at his. Shawn is all I can think about as I pass out from the alcohol.