Dear Payton,

Chapter 1

This morning I left for school at 8:00 a.m, to make up a sociology test, she was still mad at me. The last thing she said was, "I hate you." There was this burning feeling inside my throat. I felt like crying, just leaning against the wall and smashing my head in.

It's 10:06 a.m and I'm walking down the hall to find Payton, she was no where to be found. I started to panic. I ran up and down, going from building to building. She wasn't there, she wasn't anywhere. I called home and she didn't answer either but she's never late to pick me up. She used to meet me everyday and we'd walk back to the car together.

10:18 a.m, and that's when I felt it. This pain in my chest, this aching. I stopped in the middle of the hallway and everyone around me was going in slow motion. Every word that I heard was slowly going in my ear and out the other. Except one, the sound of an ambulance speeding down the street. The sirens were ringing in my ear. That's when reality hit me and I fell to my knees. I started to cry and hurt but no one came to ask me what was wrong. It was like I was invisible. "Someone help me!" I wanted to scream but my vocal chords wouldn't allow it. I was trapped.

It's 10:20 a.m, I felt my body get up and run out the doors of the school. My mind had lost all control of my body. I know because my mind was telling me to stop but my body just wanted to run. I still don't remember what was going through my head. A part of me was so scared and afraid, another was hopeful.

It's 10:23 a.m, I saw her car surrounded by ambulances. I saw the pole that she drove into. My heart stopped what felt like forever. I couldn't breathe but suddenly, I began to scream. But no one heard it. No sound, no heads turned, nothing. I took a deep breath and I ran. I ran right through the nurses and ran up to her in the ambulance. Everyone on scene was trying to hold me back, "I'm her fucking girlfriend!" I screamed in agony. Everyone let go and I climbed up and looked over Payton. I whispered, "Payton? Payton! Please answer me." On the verge of tears, Payton sits up and says, "Sam, this isn't real. This isn't real. This isn't..."