Heyy people!!
We reached from 100 to 12 rank in the #beast category and that's unbelievable!!
Thanks a lot darlings for your continuous support!!
Love you all❤️❤️
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Come Bella, you wouldn't want yourself to get into any more trouble" Maya chided. I knew she was hurt from what I did.
"I am sorry Maya, I never meant you any harm." I told her feeling guilty for what she went through because of me.
"It's okay Bella. Come on" she spoke and started moving towards my room.
She did not spoke to me again. She took the plate of food, that was kept there and went outside and locked the door.
I started crying. I knew it was my fault that she went through all this but I can't stay here. I just can't. I need to go home, to my family. I miss them. I have never been without them for more than a day. I don't know what would they be thinking about me?
I went to my bed and pulled the covers above me. I was scared, scared of what he might do. I just saw what he was going to do, he could have killed Maya if I would have not interfered and that could have been because of me. It was all my fault, everything. I would have never moved out of this room and he could have never seen me.
And now I am alone, all alone for fucking two days. How will I survive here? I was starving,I hadn't eaten anything since the morning only drank that one glass of water which Maya had brought for me. I was hungry.
I needed to get my mind off things..it was better if I sleep. Once you sleep you forget everything the pain, the hunger everything. I should sleep.....yes, that's the only way to survive. I will not let him break me, I will not a pathetic silly girl who is afraid of him. I will show him who Bella Hasting's can be once she decide something.
I closed my eyes, thinking of some way that I can sleep, but my mind kept recalling today's event, how he was just inches away from slitting Maya's throat. He is a sadist, he enjoys hurting others and seeing them in pain. He was the worst person I have ever met in my life.
How can someone be so cruel, vile and inhuman? It is as if he doesn't feel any emotion, as if he is heartless. I know now why people called him a "heartless beast" because he's one. He is mean and insensitive. I have never seen anyone like him in my life. He's the kind of man people fear from. He's someone from whom parents protect their children and tell them to change ways when they see someone like him!
And look at me I am in his arrest, he has a hold of me. I am his captive and I cannot do anything about it.
He says that he is not going to give me food, so fine I'll not eat! Not just for now but till the time he keeps me here. I will make sure I don't eat anything, anything provided by him. Hell, I'll not even drink water! He wants me to strave to death, that's why he doesn't wants me to eat, so he'll get what he wants. I will neither drink, nor eat.
I was angry, angry at myself for doing something which caused pain to someone else. I was angry at him for making me feel like a prison, for making my life miserable. I was now crying and I hated it when my anger turns into tears, I was crying because I ran into a dead end and I didn't know what to do, I felt pathetic, I have never felt so helpless and vulnerable. I let him touch me, he did somethings which were horrible and he touched me in the most inappropriate ways. I cried, I even begged him. I have never ever cried in front of someone. There are reasons that I kept things bottled up inside me and never revealed my sensitive side to anyone because people only know to use your weaknesses against you. They overpower you using your weaknesses and then make you miserable that you beg them to stop.
That was exactly what he was doing. He was making me weak so that I fear him and beg him. But I'll never beg him for anything, and I'll never fear him, even if it costs me my life, I'll die but not I will not beg.
My parents always told me that I was a strong girl and that I can achieve anything in my life. I had once already went through a phase in my life where I was broken, damaged and beyond repair. I felt like my life has ended and like it was the worst that could happen to me. But that was the time when my family and Venissa helped me out. They made sure that I again become the happy child I was but some things never change. I came out of that zone but was never the same. I was now more reserved and would talk less to people and I also started to keep to myself and stay locked in my bedroom. I had gone through depression and I was willing to die rather to live for the mistake that I committed, although my parents told me it was not my fault but I still couldn't overcome it.
One night when i couldn't sleep, I took an overdose of sleeping pills. I didn't woke up for four days. After that my parents grew more conscious and used to stay with me all the time. They have seen me going through the saddest kind of sad when your tears can't fall and you feel nothing. When you don't cry, you don't hear, you don't see. You just sit there. And for that moment, your heart dies. Finally they sent me to a therapist who helped me out, but I was never fully recovered from it and I know that I never can.
I only wish that my family lives happily without me and they don't worry about me. I have already caused then great pain and sufferings years ago, I don't want to be the reason to cause them more pain and make there life miserable.
My day has been a memorable one, but not with happy memories with sad and depressing once. I was tried to be raped, then I finally came to know that I have been kidnapped by a Mafia, then I tried escaping but was caught and now I'll not be given food for two days, what more can you expect from a person who kills other mercilessly? This was too much for me, life has taken a turn from where there's no looking back. I don't even know whether I'll be able to see my family again.
I am tired and sick of all this shit.
I am sick of feeling this way.
I am sick of hating everything.
I am sick of making things worst.
I am sick of letting people down.
I am sick of being hurt.
I am sick of crying myself to sleep.
I am sick of being me.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
What could have made Bella go through depression?
What did you feel about this chapter? Do let me know.
Lots of love people ❤️
Please Remember to vote, comment and share❤️
