sign {h.s.}

kapitel nio

PART OF ME had been expecting to be immediately confronted by Harry upon my return to the dorm. Considering the amount of unintentional and un-welcomed run-ins that we've had thus far, it didn't seem too far out of the realm of possibility that he would be pacing around the room, waiting to promptly beset me. Set aside his obligation to Lola, his employer, and all that we are left with is his insatiable desire to antagonize me.

Yet, by the time that I arrived back to my room, he is long gone.

Lola is sitting on her bed with notebooks spread out all around her. Her hair is worn naturally today, though pulled back from her face in a way that I've not seen before. Clear to my viewing now, I realize the angular shape of her features, a bone structure sharp enough to cut through glass. Simultaneously comes the recognition that tension pulls her features tight—tight enough that she looks as if she could soon snap. "Are you O-K?" I sign to her when I catch her attention.

"Stressed," she verbally responds huffing out a large breath of air.

"Can I do anything?" I ask, enunciating and speaking slowly. A feeling of inadequacy churns in my stomach—or, perhaps the hangover—when I realize that I am unable to communicate this to her in her own language.

She shrugs her shoulders noncommittally and unconvincingly. Without asking, I head into the bathroom and fill the electric tea kettle with some water, knowing that a cup of tea has the ability to fix most problems. "Harry left," she speaks to me, her words causing me to turn around and look at her.

Selfishly, I am gratified by her increasing comfort with me. Obviously there is some sensation with guilt as I grapple with my aforementioned defects. I've learned a lot about ASL already in the short time that we've lived together, but I know that it is not enough. Speaking so frequently is a strain on Lola, one that is made at my own expense. Unrelentingly, she is working to accommodate me when it should be the other way around. This is her room, her space where she doesn't have to maintain the standards of the rest of the world. This is a space where she gets a break.

But still, I find myself grateful every time that she speaks to me. Not because it makes my life easier, but because it is indicative of a growing friendship and trust. If anything, that is a solid indicator that she is coming to regard me in the same, fond way that I regard her.

"Oh?"

I hadn't expected her to bring up Harry. We don't frequently talk about him if it is not relating to his imminent presence. I can't say for sure what she knows between us, but I think that she is perceptive enough to know that there is some sort of animosity between us. "I wouldn't tell him about B-R-O-D-Y." She speaks to me, pausing to individually sign out every letter of Brody's name as she speaks. Lola signs while speaking. She has always done this, but I am beginning to actively realize it now. I'm in the habit of watching her hands as she speaks, picking up on particular signs so that I can implement them in my own vocabulary.

"He was asking about B-R-O-D-Y?" Like Lola, I have taken to signing and speaking at the same time, though, my ability to sign is more sparse than her.

The knowledge of his inquiries leave a sour taste in my mouth. He has no reason to be asking about him, especially when neither myself nor Brody is there to moderate the discussion. Gossip is in human nature, but I find it particularly strange that Harry would be insistent to engage in such a modality of conversation. Thus far he has made it rather obvious that he doesn't feel any particular kindness towards me. His relationship with me is professional and indulged solely out of formality.

I find his insertion of himself into my business strange, but even stranger than he would involve Lola as the middle man instead of asking me himself. Thus far into our acquaintance he has shown no level of difficulty in holding conversation with me. It frequently ends in some sort of exasperated disagreement, but I am beginning to think that is impossible to avoid amongst our clashing personalities.