(1) When We Collide (T. Stark)

Chapter Twelve

All Spencer can see is orange, and all she can feel is heat coming from from the wrapped, burning body of John Winchester. Standing on either side of her, hands in their pockets, are Sam and Dean. Sam is near tears and fidgeting, Dean staring into the flames silently. Spencer holds Tony's bear in one hand and her other rests on her stomach, Sam looks down at her.

"Before he.. before, did he say anything to you? About anything?" Sam asks her, Spencer stares at the fire.

"No. Nothing" She answers, lying. John added more weight to her shoulders before he died, like she needed any more, she already feels like she is going to cripple under it. Dean looks to her and then sighs.

"Come on" he takes the bear from her so he can take her hand. "When was the last time you slept?" he asks starting to walk away with her. Sam stares at the fire a moment more before following them.

................

A week later: Spencer sits in a rocking chair looking out the window over Bobby's salvage yard, it's been a week since the accident and she's still not spoken to Tony. And he's kept to his word and left he be to grieve and to figure things out, he sends a text though, every day, letting her know that he's only a phone call away and that he hopes she's okay. He's taking this better then she thought he would. She honestly thought he'd run a mile and never look back. Bobby enters the room and watches her a moment, a blanket wrapped around her legs which are pulled up to her chest. She plays with the plastic ring on her finger, her eyes just staring out the window. He moves towards her and touches her shoulder, she looks up at him.

"Hey" she greets. "Is everything okay? Do you need my help?" she asks, sounding hopeful, he knows she wants something to take her mind off of everything, but she needs to think about her future. And her unborn child. And he's been purposely keeping her away from it, just till she makes her mind up. He holds out his hand for hers, she raises an eyebrow and takes his hand, he turns her hand over.

"Here" Bobby sets an orange in her upturned hand, she frowns at it. "Vitamin C" he tells her sitting on the bed. "For the little one" she smiles softly at him and pulls her knife from her boot to cut it open. "Have you...made up your mind yet?" Bobby asks.

"Nope" she answers. "I'll wake up and I'll think....I can do this and then by bed time I just feel...I can't" she sighs and peels the sink from the wedge of orange in her hand, she just watches the wedge as she works. "How am I suppose to know if I am ready for this?" she asks looking to Bobby. "How am I supposed to know if I can even do this?" Bobby leans on his knees.

"Do you remember when you were 9 or 10?" he asks, she raises an eyebrow. "Your Daddy told you that you couldn't play with my gun?" she nods. "You were so stubborn about it that you damn well tried" she smiles a little. "I don't know how or where you learnt to...but I woke up to find you shooting cans out the back....you knew exactly what you were doing" she looks back to the orange. "I have no doubt you'll approach this the same way....if you want to keep it, Spencer, don't let what everyone thinks tell you otherwise. You're a brilliant and bright young woman. Do what ever you think is best for you"

"Thank you" she whispers, he stands and squeezes her shoulder. He leaves her alone, she takes a breath and grabs her cell phone. She needs to start deciding what she wants.

............

Dean walks into the spare room where Spencer is still sat in the rocking chair but she's more animated then before.

"How you feeling?" Dean asks leaning against the wall in front of her, she nods a little.

"I haven't thrown up today, so....yay" she answer unenthusiastically.