More than friends?

Chapter 9

"Can I help you?" I said to her as I walked to my front door with her sitting down on the bench next to my door. I can tell that she had been here for awhile just with her body language. I know that she is upset with me for not answering her calls and her texts that I've been ignoring all week.

"Where on earth have you been recently and where were you tonight?" She looked at me with her eyes piercing through my soul, but I had no affect to it. I just continued to standing while she got up from the bench. I am not sure what she is going to do next.

"Are we done? I need to know if this is done or what is going to happen. You can't just ignore me for weeks and not give me an explanation. If you don't wan to be with me you need to tell me. This has been killing me all week... Look I know I have done things to make you upset or even question our relationship. It's just really weird that out of no where this happens. What happened? Like I really want to know. Did you meet someone?" She said right into my eyes.

My heart felt like it was going to burst out of my chest and I can feel my face burning. She was right that I needed to tell her that it was over if it was over for us. Just when she asked if there was someone else in the picture it just kinda took me off guard. I didn't expect her to say anything like this. I was lost of words at the moment. I honestly didn't know what to say to her. I know that I need to be honest with her, but part of me didn't want to because she's been dishonest to me plenty of times. This isn't like me to play pay back. I'm not who I used to be and I kinda like it in a way. I know I need to be honest with her, but I'm not ready yet.

"Hey, you need to talk to me. You can't just stand there and not say a word to me. I deserve to know what is going on." She then had tears coming down her face and continued to talk to me. "Look I know I am not a perfect person, but my love for you is deep. I love you so much and I really want to fix this. Like please just talk to me... I am begging you." She then wrapped her arms around me and cried. I feel bad but I don't know what to say to her. I looked at her and sighed. I am going to make this quick because I just want to be alone right now.

"Look, I'm sorry for being weird for the past few weeks. I just don't feel myself and I don't know what's wrong. I'm going through something right now and I need to figure it out myself. You haven't helped much either, but it hasn't all been you. Also, to answer your questions. I went out with the guys tonight and no I haven't met anyone else. Like I said I am a different person right now and I am sorry this is so sudden. I would like to try and fix this though." I can't believe I just lied twice... It just came out so naturally. This is when I knew that our relationship will be ending within this week. I can feel it in my gut. It's for the best that I lied to her so she can push me away and call it off and move on from me. 

"Ok..kaayy. I just don't like what's going on right now. I miss my sweet guy that would tell me everything and be open with me. I just feel like you're a completely different person right now. You have always have your guard up and once I finally get it down you put it back up... Like I can never win and it's exhausting. I just want all of you. I mean it when I say that Yugi. I want you now and forever. I know you're going through something, but don't push me out please. I am here for you. I know I have done this to you in the past, but I don't want to push you away when I know you need me... Like when you were trying to be there for me and I pushed you away... Please don't do what I did to you... I love you." She hugged me tighter and continued to sob into my chest.

I looked at her and I sighed. I feel terrible about this entire situation. I just can't believe I pretty much woke up one day and not wanting this anymore. It was like a light switch and I am actually shocked that I am having to deal with this right now. Just a few weeks ago I was ready to pop the question on this girl and now I am wanting a new life with someone else in time. I am not ready for a new serious relationship, but I do want out this relationship. I just don't feel like we are meant for one another anymore. It's been a roller coaster since we were 17 and it hasn't stopped. If it doesn't work out the first time, why would it work out the 3rd time we have tried within the past year and half? I am making this so much harder on the both of us...

"Lets call it a night, and get some rest okay? Everything will be okay. I promise." I smiled at her and she slowly smiled back.

"Okay... Will you please text me or call me tomorrow?" She begged. I thought to myself that I will be busy all during the day for work and then she will go in when I am getting off... Then I am meeting with Yami after his shift. I bit my lip thinking. I guess I can just send her small texts throughout the day and try to talk I guess. 

"Yeah, I'll text you when I have time. Can you please not blow up my phone please?" I looked at her and I can tell she felt bad for it.

"Yeah... Sorry and okay... I'll text you when I am home okay?" She looked down and I nodded at her.

She got in her car and drove away. What a night...

I finally walked into my house. Goodness what a day... This has been a heck of a week and it's still not over yet. I took off my shoes and went straight for my room. I turned on the lights and laid down on my bed. I pulled out my phone from my pocket and I saw a few texts. I already knew who's name it would be on my phone. To my surprise her name didn't pop up on my phone. I had 4 texts from Yami and I was actually really surprised. I sat up on the bed and opened his texts.

'Hey there, sorry I haven't talked to you much today. It's been a day, but a day closer to hanging out with you tomorrow(:'

'Sooooo... work has been rough. I wish you were here running the shift.'

'I wish someone would message backkkkkk, it''s been like all day since I have talked to you..........'

'I hope you had a good day today and I can't wait to see you tomorrow. I hope I get to talk to you before you have to go to bed because you have work early in the morning.'

I smiled and I also felt really bad that I hadn't replied to him at all. I hurried and replied to him letting him know that I had a good day, but also busy. I didn't tell him about the whole Rebecca situation. That was way too much to put onto him. Once I replied I laid down and put my headphones on. I kept thinking about this entire day and it has been super tiring. It's like I didn't even have a day off today. I closed my eyes and just relaxed listening to my playlist.

What a day.