The Stories That Never Have Endings- (Snowbarry Soulmate Aus)

(82) reluctance

Barry Allen never wanted to meet his soulmate.

He saw what losing his mum did to his dad and he never wanted to go through that, his dad was broken. He barely ate, he didn't work and he spent most of his time sleeping and he looked right throughw
Barry.

Barry loved his father but he didn't like visit him becuase all he did was talk about his mother like she'd just popped to the shops and she'd be back.

The denial over Noras loss would be Henry's constant companion forever.

Everyone deals with grief in diffrent ways.

Some move on fairly quickly and accept that there in a better place.

Others never get over the loss instead they throw themselves in activities like work or extreme sports.

While others try their hardest to forget.

When Barry received his soulmark in his 13th birthday he remebered his mother telling him that when he meets his soulmate he should never let her go because having a soulmate was the best gift.

Once his mother died Barry covered up the blue bird that he had named Rayla.

The blue bird spent most of its time over Barry's heart trying to protect him from all the hurt he felt.

Sometimes it would sit on his right shoulder and sing when Barry was in close proximity to his soulmate Rayla would flap her wings and chirp so loudly in his head until he got far enough away from her.

He had, had to many close calls with his soulmate.

It wasn't that he was avoding her becuase he just wasn't ready. He was avoiding her becuase he didn't want her.

If he had her he could lose her. He couldn't miss some one he'd never known.
***

Caitlin was messed up.

She put all her love in one person and did everything she could to make them happy and to make sure they loved her back just as much as she loved them.

It was wrong and it was toxic but she couldn't help it.

Her parents were Soulmates they loved eachother so much there was no love to spare for her.

Her parents sent her to a boarding school and that's how she lived.

She didn't grow up with any one to look up to and she had no one to lean on. She had no mother figure and no father figure she had parents who she was always so desperate to please them.

Because maybe she was doing something wrong. If she was perfect, they'd love her.

When she was 13 she got her soulmate mark the blue bird was beautiful and it spent most of its time on her shoulder or on her write wrist so she always knew she was there, so she knew she wasn't alone.

She named the blue bird hope it was cheesy but she was 13 and the name was fitting.

Now here she was 24 years of age and she still craved someone's love. She couldn't help it.

Her therapist said she needed to focus more on herself.

But then again after he'd said that he'd fucked her on his desk...

Sometimes Caitlin would trace every detail of the blue bird and imagine what her soulmate would be like.

She'd almost met him a few times and every time she stayed in that same place and waited.

After the 4th time she got the message lound and clear.

He didn't want to meet her.

He was the only person who could love her. He was supposed to love her.