Chances are....

24. What do YOU want?

Bradley

After about a 30 minute drive to the golf course Justine and I played 4 or 5 holes before she got hungry.

"So now that I've beaten you a total of 3 times, I win." she grinned and swatted me with the club.

"Technically I win because I'm the holder of the car keys." I held the keys up as I walked back towards the counter and returned our clubs.

"So wait, we're not getting food?" she asked trailing behind me.

"Depends." I glanced over my shoulder at her.

"I hope you enjoyed your game sir." the red head spoke from behind the counter.

"I did thank you, let's go." I grabbed Justine's hand and headed for my car.

I opened her door and walked around to get in. "It's too damn cold for this. What the hell kind of bipolar weather is this?"

"It's the end of August what do you expect?" Justine countered as she shut the door and turned on the radio.

"No." I turned it back off..

"Why not?"

"Because you're trying to avoid an inevitable conversation, which we are about to have. Right now."

"I am not. I have no idea what you're talking about." she reached for her headphones and I quickly grabbed them.

"What are you so afraid of?" I gripped the steering wheel as I drove towards campus

"I'm not afraid of anything, can you not grip the steering wheel so tight?" I loosened my grip and sighed. "Am I really not good enough for you?"

"What are you talking about? I never said-"

I pulled over and shut the car off facing her. "You never said what?"

"I- I never said that- that you weren't good enough. Look, I have my own issues to work out. I don't want to drag you into my problems."

"What problems Justine? What? I want you and everything that comes along with you. Why can't you see that? Huh?"

she didn't say anything, she just stared at me.

"Here we go again. You're just gonna stare at me. You know what, ok. Fine. You don't want this. Fine." I turned the car back on.

"Bradley I- you just-"

"Save it. Let's get you back to your dorm."

"I thought we were gonna watch a movie." she looked confused, I wasn't going to force something she didn't want on her.

"I don't think that's such a good idea."

"Are you really upset about this?" she had no idea.

"Well, I'd say it was quite obvious, is it not?"

"I allowed myself to get too comfortable around you, I just need to back off a bit."

"You didn't have to 'allow' yourself, it was natural. I didn't plan that and neither did you Justine I didn't know you'd be at that hotel."

"To be honest, it was you who kissed me, this is all your fault. Technically speaking."

"So you really feel nothing right now? You're just ok with being 'friends'?"

"For now, yes."

"Well, I'm not and I can't help that." I pulled into her building's entrance and she paused before getting out and walking towards the door. I needed to say something. Anything.