Baggage l.h. {au}

9.○

        There's was one thing I realized.  I was so incredibly wrong about Luke.  He wasn't this innocent, sweet, adorable boy from Australia that I met about a month ago.  He has a secret, on he won't tell me.  He's not who I thought he was, and that's what hurt the most.

I let my guard down.

 But, I'm still wondering why it even hurt at all.  I obviously did not know this boy.

 I was so done at trying.  At everything.  If Luke didn't want to try, then why should I?  And I have to admit, it hurt more than it should.

         I ran back to the building, clutching my sweater to my clammy body, engulfed in sobs and snot.  I left Luke at the scene to sort out whatever problems he had.  He obviously didn't care that much about me.

 Luke is a coward, backing out of everything just because he didn't want to tell me something. 

My mind was wondering over all the questions that crowded inside my brain.

        Did he even like me?

        Was it even worth it?

        Why am I fucking crying

        He's just a boy, right?

        I would be lying to myself if I said I didn't care. I would be lying to myself if I said it didn't all hurt.

I would also be lying to myself if I said Luke was nothing to me.

 My pace picked up, throwing my feet faster in front of me.  I gasped for air, tangling my footing and falling to the ground, scrapping my knee on the hard, rough concrete. 

  "God dammit!" I scream in frustration.  My life already sucked at the moment anyway, why not make it worse.  "Why!" I scream at the blood pooling around the newly made hole in my jeans.  I stand to my feet, slightly limping in the direction I was previously going.  "I hate you, Luke." I gasp. 

'You're lying, Dakota.' My mind subconsciously reminded me.

"I know." I whisper, breaking once more into what felt like a million pieces. 

        And one thing I did'nt understand, how could this boy weave his way into my life so quickly?  How could this boy break me so easily?  We weren't even together, but yet it felt worse than any other breakup.   This wasn't even a break up.

"Dakota!"  A deep Australian voice calls from behind me, I freeze.  Luke.  I begin to run again, ignoring the pain in leg.  I know, I wasn't one to run away from my problems, but this one, yeah, it was killing me.  "Koda, please stop running away from me."

 "Luke get the fuck away from me!  I hate you!  I never want to see you again!" I gasp, calling him out.

"You know that's not true."

"You said it yourself, you'll ruin me." I say coldly, stopping my sprint, turning to face him.  He stops also, slightly doubled over, breathing heavily.  "You don't want me, and I sure as hell don't want you!"

"Look, I'm sorry." He breaths out, standing up straight, giving me a better angle to take in his face.  It was red and streaked with tears, still slightly discolored from the black eye that was there from last week, when he showed up at my house after blowing off our date.

 "Save it, Luke.  I don't want to hear it." I snap, turning my head so he doesn't see me cry.

"I- I just didn't want to hurt you."