Shattering the Alpha (Book #1)

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*NOT EDITED*

"Is she going to be okay?" I heard a worried voice that I recognized as Emily's say.

"Yeah, I believe so. She passed out from the pain. I could give her some pain killers, but I doubt they will help," another voice said. I assumed this was the pack doctor.

"Can't you just sedate her until this is all over?" a voice I didn't recognize asked.

"No. I've only heard about one other case where sedation was attempted to help the she-wolf with her heat. When they administered the drugs to sedate her, the human part of her was unconscious, but her wolf part wasn't affected. So, even though she was technically unconscious, she could still feel pain, was still extremely sweating, and her body temperature was still very high. It didn't serve any good, and the girl was incapable of voicing out what she needed. Since her wolf is initiating this heat cycle, the only way to effectively shut it down would be to inject her with some silver. Not only is this very dangerous, but since her wolf is at her most vulnerable state right now, the smallest dose of silver could kill her,"

So, to sum up I am stuck with this pain for at least another three days, or until Axel comes and helps me out. As I began to regain consciousness, I felt a damp, cold towel on my forehead. I slightly began opening my eyes, to be greeted by Emily and Dr. Parker's worried faces. I also saw another person who I couldn't recognize, holding Dr. Parker's hand. She is probably his mate, which explains why he wasn't affected by my heat like Mason was. Judging from the scrubs she was wearing, she was probably a nurse and was here professionally. I felt really guilty for stringing these people along with my drama, so I smiled at them. Hopefully, they can see that I will be fine, and that I don't want them to worry.

"Hey Callista, how are you feeling?" Dr. Parker asked. His voice was softer than it was last time, and I was sure that his wolf was upset that his Luna is in pain. It took me a second to process his question. But, when I did, I noticed that I felt so hot I just wanted to undress and lay in a pool of iced water. Every part of my body was aching. Every single cell in my body was craving something it can't have, and nothing would be able to appease this pain.

"I'm fine," I lied with a smile. There was no need for him to know the truth. It will only worry him more. No werewolf doctor has ever been able to figure out how to help a female with her heat. Painkillers never work because the pain is too severe to be alleviated by a couple painkillers that help fast-healing werewolves with deal with a broken arm. I doubt he bought my lie though.

"How long was I out for?" I asked.

"About thirty minutes," Dr. Parker's mate answered. "Oh, I'm Andrea, Johny's mate. I wish we would have met during better circumstances," she continued with a sympathetic look. I smiled back at her, trying my best to not let the smile turned into a grimace as another wave of pain shot through me.

"I had no idea that Dr. Parker's first name was "Johny." I honestly thought Parker was your first name," I laughed trying to lighten the mood. Dr. Parker just rolled his eyes and said, "It's John, and only Rea gets to call me that," he put his arm around her as he said that. "Anyway, since there is anything more I can really do, I am going to leave you with Nurse Andrea and Emily. They will take care of you if you need anything," he said. He turned towards Andrea and planted a kiss on her forehead, whispered what I think were the words, "I love you," then left the room. I couldn't deny the twang of jealousy that ran through me. Why can't I have that with Axel?

"Alright! The nap I just had was extremely rejuvenating, and I feel one hundred percent better. So, how about you both go about your lives, and I will go to the bathroom and take a long shower because I stink," I lied again as I made my way off the bed towards the restroom. I can't have them think that I am too weak to handle my heat. As of now, Emily, Mason, Dr. Parker, and most importantly Axel have seen me in a very vulnerable state, and I don't want Andrea to get a similar idea about me. I want them to know that I am fit to be Axel's mate. I want them to believe that I can be Luna.

"Are you sure that you will be fine? You passed out from the pain just a little while ago. It wasn't a nap," Andrea said. I just nodded at her and closed the door behind me when I made it to the bathroom. I knew that this heat was not going to end anytime soon, but my body felt like it was on fire. So, I filled the tub with the coldest water possible and just sat in it. I kept regulating the temperature every time my body warmed it up. I don't know how long I had been sitting in the tub like that, but my body was starting to come accustomed to the temperature and the icy water wasn't helping as much anymore. Couple that with the frequent waves of pain, I felt like I was so close to death.

"Callista, are you OK, honey? You have been in the bathroom for over two hours," I heard Emily's voice yell from across the bathroom door.

"Yeah, I am fine. Did you need anything from me?" I asked, hopeful that she will just leave me alone. I can't deal with hiding my pain again. However, I don't think she will because even though I tried my damnedest to have my voice come out strong and determined, she heard a quivery, weak one. She opened the bathroom door, and I wanted to yell at her and make her leave. I just wanted to be alone right now. But, I had no energy to stop her.

"Emily, please just leave me alone. I don't want to see anyone other than Axel right now, please."

"Alright. Just holler at me if you need anything from me," she said despondently.

After she left the bathroom, I heard her talking to someone. Curiosity got the better of me, and I tried to eavesdrop on her conversation.

"But, Alpha –pain. You have to—tonight," I could only hear part of the conversation because I was too exhausted to be able to use my heightened hearing. She is talking to him though, that is for sure. Did he decide that he doesn't want to come home this evening? What is going on? I tried my best to get out of the tub, but my legs gave out and I fell back in.

"Calista, Alpha Axel wants to talk to you," I heard her say clearly through the door.

"Sure, come in," I reached for the phone, and said with a weak voice, "Hi."

"I won't be able to come home today," he said. Just hearing his voice, calmed my wolf and granted me some relief.

"Okay, um, will you be here tomorrow then?" I asked hopeful. However, from the clipped tone the first time he talked to me, it didn't seem like the answer was yes.

"Listen, I won't be coming home as long as you are in heat. I honestly didn't know that you would start your heat today, so this worked well for me," as he said this, I couldn't help the tears that rolled down my cheeks.

"How could you be so selfish? I am glad that it worked well for you. But, what about me? I am in so much pain here, and I feel like my entire body is on fire. We don't have to mate if you don't want to, but at least you can be here to help me through the pain. Please don't do this to me," I replied choking on my sobs.

"Just push through it."

"But—," I couldn't finish what I wanted to say because I heard the beep that signaled the phone call ended. I looked around the bathroom to hand Emily her phone back, but it seems as though she gave me some privacy to have a talk with my horrible mate. I can't believe I expected him to be a little decent and care for me in this state. What if this was reversed and he was the one in all this pain, he would kill me if I just told him to "push through it."

"Emily," I called out to her. She appeared in the bathroom a couple seconds later with an expectant look. I handed her the phone, and said, "He is not coming home." She simply nodded sadly and left the bathroom again.

Because of the phone conversation, the physical pain from my heat died down a bit. Instead it was replaced with emotional pain, and I honestly didn't know which I preferred. Because I was feeling slightly better, I decided that it was time I got out of the tub and dried off. My skin was too shriveled now and my back was starting to hurt due to maintaining the same position for about three hours now.

I went to bed and fell asleep.

My heat cycle lasted for five days. It was the most excruciating five days of my life, each one getting worse and worse. The last day was especially bad, and I passed out from the pain about three times. However, I feel all better now, and the only thing on my mind is my excessive anger towards Alpha Axel who didn't call to speak with me to check up on me once throughout this entire time. I don't think he realized that I was in this predicament because of him. I am officially done trying to be a good mate to him. I had a taste of death this week, and he didn't seem to care. There is nothing left for me to salvage at this point.

 I hope you enjoyed it.