Shattering the Alpha (Book #1)

Burning

*NOT EDITED*

It has been several days since my spat with Axel, and I have been ignoring him like the plague. Because of the mate bond and that my heat cycle will be starting soon, ignoring Mr. Alpha was taking a pretty big toll on me. I was too tired to do anything, and all I wanted to do was spend time on the couch, simply moping around.

"Calista, dear, would you like me to make you anything for dinner?" I heard Emily's soft voice ask me.

"No, thanks, Emily. I don't feel like eating," I answered her. I don't know whether it was because I wanted to avoid seeing him eat in the kitchen and share a meal with him, or because I was just too upset to eat, but I haven't eaten an actual meal since our fight. I saw her nod her head hesitantly and leave the living room. I guess she understood that I wanted some alone time. Needless to say, my body was extremely tired and because of my high werewolf metabolism, I knew I was heading into a dangerous situation.

I don't really remember falling asleep on the couch, but in my slightly unconscious state, I heard someone approach the couch I was on. From his scent, I knew it was Axel. However, not wanting to deal with him, I remained still, acting as though I wasn't slowly regaining consciousness.

I felt him bend down and lift me up, carrying me bridal style, leaving one of my arms wrapped around his neck, and the other resting on my abdomen. My head was tucked in his neck, allowing me to effectively hide the blush that crept up my face. His hands were securely on my back and on the back of my knees, and I felt like my skin was on fire. He kept walking for a while, and I felt him push open a door with his back and finally set me down on the bed. After covering me up with the soft comforter, I heard him whisper, "Goodnight, baby," before leaving a lingering kiss on my forehead. Then, I heard the familiar click of the door closing.

So, he thinks that all it is going to take for me to go running back to him is a kiss on the forehead and a 'good night?' I was definitely confused about what had just transpired, but too tired to stay awake, so I went to bed, hoping to figure out what was going on in Axel Knight's head tomorrow.

It was two in the morning when I woke up drenched in my own sweat. I sat up straight in bed realizing that my second heat cycle has begun. I tried to calm down, knowing that I will be expecting a lot of pain. However, I was scared to experience the same pain that came last time. As my first wave of pain coursed through me, I let out a whimper, knowing that this won't be easy. I debated calling mom and having her come and help me. No, that would just worry her and dad, and I didn't want what happened last time to happen again.

The pain kept intensifying and now instead of it being in waves, it was consistent. I tried controlling myself, as to not wake Axel up. I didn't know if Mason was spending the night here either, and I didn't want a redo of what happened last time, especially since Emily isn't here to rescue me.

Unfortunately, even though I was trying my best to control myself through the pain, the extreme aching reverberating through me, caused me to let out a scream, causing me to feel more pain in my throat.

I desperately wanted this to stop, but there was only one way to have that happen. But, Axel and I are in a fight and he is adamant on not sleeping with me until the Trials. It has only been a few minutes into my heat and I already feel like I am dying. How am I supposed to survive days with this?

The door busted open, and Axel was staring at me with golden, glowing eyes that kept switching back to his green ones. He was going to lose control of his wolf really fast, and that will only lead to a disastrous situation.

"Shit," I heard him say.

"Get out," I tried to say menacingly. Although, it sounded like a wounded puppy was begging for help. I saw him grip the door, and with obvious struggle with his wolf counterpart, he was able to exit the room. Even though the amount of restraint that he was showing was impressive, the moment the door slammed shut, I was a sobbing mess. Because Axel left, the relief that I felt was short-lived, because the next thing I knew was that I was screaming out in pain.

It was only a couple minutes of excruciating pain before I heard the door open again. My tears were blurring my vision, but from his scent, I knew the intruder was Axel. What was he doing here? He knew I didn't want him here.

"I told you to get out," I whimpered. He kept approaching the bed, and I didn't know if this was good or bad. I was still to mad at him, but his scent and his presence was pretty calming, and it was helping with the pain. He released a sigh, and I knew that this was probably hard on him too. It had been a couple of days since we had a proper conversation, and I think the mate bond finally caught up to us.

"I know." His answer wasn't sufficient.

"You did this to me," I blamed him. I don't know how fair I was being, but I was all around mad at him and in too much pain to be reasonable.

"I'm sorry," he managed, staring at the floor instead of making eye contact with me.

"You're sorry?!" I yelled out, causing my voice to crack. "You think sorry is going to cut it? I am drenched in sweat, and I feel like my body is on fire. I am in so much pain, and all you can think of is that you are sorry?"

"Calista, you know—," he started, but I interrupted him, "I don't want to hear your excuses. We could have avoided this altogether, but here I am feeling like death has gave me a visit, and you are standing there without a care in the world." I was a crying mess at this point, and at the end of my little speech, I felt another wave of pain hit, so I released a couple cries through my sobs.

"Does it really look like I don't have a care in the world right now? I am here, trying to fix this, and all you are doing is yelling at me. This affects me too you know, I feel your pain through the bond. Maybe not as strongly, but I wouldn't say I'm comfortable either." I saw him run his hand through his hair, clearly frustrated with what is going on.

"You deserve it! You fabricated a lie about the Lunar Trials and mating. You said that it was your goddamn 'tradition'. When, in fact, your own parents didn't do that!"

"And both my parents are dead right now! So, shut up, and understand that I did this because it was the best option!" he exclaimed, losing his temper, yet not letting his wolf take control. I didn't understand how he was able to control himself like this anyway. Last time, Mason couldn't even handle being in the same room with me for more than ten seconds before pouncing on me.

I wasn't really sure how to respond to that, as I obviously don't know the full story. I made a mental note to check Luna Arabella's journals again, before turning around and tucking myself more under the covers, hoping to drive him away.

"Fine. Do you want me to mate with you?" he conceded. 

"What?" I released quietly, being too exhausted to keep yelling at him. "No, I don't want to have sex with you, Alpha. Just go away, I am in enough pain as it is, and I don't need to be humiliated as well."

With that he backed away from the bed, giving me the space I needed. Unfortunately, when he left the room, the pain got worse, and I released another gut-wrenching scream. I expected the pain to get worse, but not instantaneously. I clutched the bed sheets as the torture continued.

"Just let me hold you. It will help you, and I swear I won't do anything out of line," I heard him say as he was standing at the door. I really wanted to refuse his help, but I couldn't bring myself to do that.

"Okay," I sniveled. He approached the bed sitting on top of the covers, then dragged me towards his body. Even though his body was warm and it was radiating heat, the fire that I felt was burning inside me died down, and for a second I was finally able to breathe. He kept stroking my hair with one arm, although it made me feel self-conscious because it was tangled and all wet and gross from my sweat. His other arm was on my back, sending peaceful tingles throughout my body to counteract the pain.

"Why don't you try to sleep? It is going to be a rough week for you if not longer, and you should get as much rest as you can," he offered gently. I nodded my head, agreeing with him, finally feeling some relief from the murderous pain. I snuggled deeper into his chest, and placed my right hand on the top of his chest towards his neck. Instantly feeling a burn, I pulled my hand away from his chest, releasing a slight cry as I did so. Looking at the affected area, I saw that my index and middle fingers were red and throbbing.

"Are you alright," he asked worriedly.

"Yeah, but why did my fingers burn?" I inquired back. I remembered feeling my fingers burn when I touched Mason during my heat. But this was obviously different.     

"Don't worry about it, and sleep," he said, grabbing my hand and placing it lower on his abdomen.