Entry one-
Being a hero isn't fun, living up to the expectations are even worse. I can't remember the last time I could really be myself without the fans and paparazzi tailing me every step I take out into the public. Really, such a pain and I have no one to honestly talk to about this.
I do have friends, plenty of friends yet somehow I don't feel a true connection with any of them. It's taken me time to really process who I call a friend when really some of my 'friends' are just allies who tolerate me against a common evil.
It hurts a bit, no one really cares how I feel. I'm expected to save the day. I'm expected to worry only about the people. I'm the one who has to risk my life just because an idiotic and petty failure of a scientist decides that I'm his mortal enemy and he must seek out destruction to summon me.
I never wanted this life, I just want to have the best times with people who truly care about me and just live a simple life of fun without deadly robots and the pressure to live up to someone I will never be. If only it were that simple, journal, if only I could live this daydream life.
. . .
Entry two-
Another bitter rant I guess, Amy is quite persistent on being my girlfriend, won't ever take no for an answer. She's not my type, too bossy, too petulant, and fake. Although I can't say anything about that, I'm fake too. Huh, I wonder if Shads- I mean Shadow is right. I think in some sardonic way I like his little nickname for me. Faker, it suits me more than him. At least he doesn't hide his true self.
I'm too much of a coward to act out in fear of, disappointment? Shame? Whatever it is this isn't the point, the point is he is real. He is much more stronger than I could ever wish to be.
Maybe I should invite him over in private and talk to him about this...no he wouldn't ever come unless it was a life or death situation. He hates me to ever take whatever I have to say seriously.
I think that's another stupid expectation oh so graciously given to me. I'm supposed to be brash, punch first then ask questions kind of guy. Not smart, just stupidly brave and lucky. I'm supposed to be never serious and I honestly regret filling up that expectation. Really, only an idiot can rush into battle without a plan and not take in many factors seriously, although I am pretending to be that idiot...
My kid genius brother Tails, even he doesn't see what's expected of him, if he does. Well damn, he sure likes to overachieve them with some of his creations. I'm never sure if I should talk to him about it again... the last time I did was maybe a few weeks before I got you, journal.
The hilarious-not really just sarcasm again- thing was the fact that he didn't believe me, he didn't see it. He even asked if I was okay, he tried to take my temperature and he just looked at me with this fear...like I was sick or insane.
So I'm never doing that again. He still gives me that look when he thinks I can't see him. Oh well, I think I lost some of my trust in him, don't get me wrong I still love him but I just don't feel the same anymore, talking about serious things.
If you asked anyone about me they would list what everyone thinks I am. It's exhausting at times, disappearing doesn't sound like a bad idea...nah that's too extreme at the moment. Wait, I'll speak with Shadow, I don't care anymore. I just need someone real to talk to. Even just once...
. . .
Sonic closed his journal, the first few pages filled with his private thoughts. His mind was buzzing with questions and his chest felt heavy with anxiety and fear. Maybe he was going crazy?
Sonic slipped the dull pencil through the spirals of plastic holding the paper together and possibly his sanity. He was careful when he bent down on one knee and his fingers lightly gripped the only loose floorboard in his room where he could keep secrets like the journal hidden.
A small spiteful smile made it's way onto his face. Time to seek out Shadow, and get Tails off his back. Pretty annoying being watched and studied, Sonic has had enough of that in his life.
I hope this is an enjoyable chapter. I've already posted this story on Fanfic months ago and Archive recently so I decided I'll do it here too. I'd love to hear the feedback of anybody who's read this. Obviously I don't own Sonic or any of the characters, they all belong to SEGA. I only write for pleasure.
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Faker
FanfictionI never wanted this life, I just want to have the best times with people who truly care about me and just live a simple life of fun without deadly robots and the pressure to live up to someone I will never be. If only it were that simple, journal, i...