The next day, I didn't call or anything, I just showed up at the practice.. The whole team was there (it was a blessing that they was there) I would have a chance to see what x's state of mind was before being alone with him ; To my incredible relief, it seemed that nothing had changed, the conversation flowed easily, x was his usual spirit, charming self, and there was no drama..
It discouraged me cause deep inside me I thought that i knew his reaction that " Forget everything about yesterday, it was a mistake :)"After practice, we went the "Exit Stairs" then i said :
- Can we talk? I don't know what to say.. But I'm sorry for leaving you yesterday.. I always hate it in the movies when someone storms out, hangs up, or breaks up, It always seems like such a pathetic failure.. I think last night was the first time in my life when I simply had no words, no thoughts, nothing. I left because I had to.. It was a rotten thing to do, and I left you scared and alone because I couldn't handle the truth, I'm so sorry..
- You don't have to apologize because I was pretty sure you would leave. No one could handle something like that..
I got shocked :
- you mean you planned that whole thing?
- Yeah, I'm sorry but I had to. I needed to know how you felt, and I knew that you couldn't have been honest enough with yourself if I had just asked you. I needed to show you, and I needed you to show me how you felt.
- How could kept all that inside you?
- I'm a patient man, and I wanted you to be ready
(God if i could be like that)
- it's not a question of patience or time; if we get in trouble , it's not going to be okay next week or next year.
- I'm sorry I made you violate your confidence , I'm sorry I made some struggles, he said
- Our confidence, it's not only mine.
(he chuckled a little bit), I continued :
-..but you only said what you were feeling! what we were both feeling, and it's not a mistake to love someone.. And anyway, you can't make someone feel bad about it because they have to do that themselfes..
Now I was really crying, again, and he reach out and wiped the tears out of my eyes, and he said something that took the breath out of me : "You made me the happiest man in the world, last night. Just knowing that you feel about me the same way I feel about you is all I'll ever need. Just be true to what you believe, and you'll come out all right on the other side", i said "I love you", i blurred out and he grinned at me then I pulled him into a bear hug and we embraced for a few minutes. It felt awesome..Off that this feeling didn't stretch something went wrong :
after that we kissed, we heard a doorway.. it was one of the swimmers (the biggest homophobic person i've ever seen) he was spying us, which he also filmed us..
YOU ARE READING
Deeply In Secret (BoyxBoy)
Short StoryFalling in love with my boy best friend, makes of me a suicidal. - Thank you, father..