Deeply In Secret (BoyxBoy)

Chapter Ten (Pre-Final)

...This was the beginning of my suicide story. It's completion is contingent on continual failure in my attempts to take my life..

Everything is up now.. I came out to my parents, at first the were surprised at our return. Mommy noticed the side effects of my suicide attempt (i had blue marks on my neck). My aunt explained all : Mom were shocked! Her fingers were shaking rhythmically, as if in spasm... And then her legs gently folded and she subsided slowly on the step, ungainly as a marionette, she prayed.. And about my dad he hunched his shoulders trying to disappear himself, cause it's because of him!!
I went to my room, I spent the most of time staring, I missed it a lot. Then, while I was fixing on walls, my dad knocked the door. I allowed him to come though . He looked at me with tears left to cry, He thought that I'm not going to notice.. Then I said:
- I just never want to disappoint, you, then I started crying.
- You are the thing I am most proud of in this entire world. I have the strongest boy. You could never disappoint me. few seconds in silence and he added "I want you to know that I love you. I may not get it, I mean I don't get it, yet, but I want to, I want to learn. If you can be patient with me, I want to get there together." Then, I held him really close to me, and i knew behind his shittiness, he really does love me and wants the best for me; he is just so set in his ways that he will never accept me, so I'm constantly torn about feeling bad for him but also wishing he would just come around already. When he was going to leave, he suggested something : "inviting x for tomorrow's dinner"..

I had some chills, cause in these recent days i've been ignoring him, I was scared .. My conscience assures me about how I passed over him ! I don't wanted to hide something to him.. I sent him a message "babe, I sorry. I got some issues.. I'll explain you all tomorrow! By the way, you're invited to a dinner at my house tomorrow night. " he answered me on the spot (it looks like he was waiting for me) he wrote me:
"DUDE! WHERE DID YOU GO? I AM SO WORRIED!!" I replied :"Tomorrow at 7p.m at my house. Byyeeee <3."
Next, I'm relaxed ; my parents supported my decision. Also, I thought that when they met each other I'm going to be more relaxed, cause they knew that I have someone special in my life.

Tomorrow's morning, ugh.. I changed my mind, I'm no longer relaxed. I spent the whole morning practicing the way I'm going to introduce x to my parents...

[7p.m] :
The hour I've waited , I was extremely nervous, I can't think straight! I wasn't quit, even I didn't look in the mirror, I didn't want to see my face...
THE BELL RINGED !!I ran outdoors, (IT WAS X) When I saw his face; my heart began to pound. I stood there, feeling a desire running from my heart, to my chest, and down toward my inner thighs. Then he attracted me and we kissed : His finger touched my neck, he gave me chills! I felt safe, he whispered to me with his sexy voice "Asshole, I'm miss you" . My heart is about to beat out of my chest and I close my eyes and take a deep breath out. After, he runs his lips to my skin towards my ear, then I tlit my head znd after his deep breath out, he bites me gently! It doesn't hurt, it only makes me want more. We are facing each other! He stares into my eyes and smiles, whith two hands he grab my left hand and he places my open palm on his heart, and he holds it there. His eyes exude love, protection, security, safety, patience, and respect.. Then he we hugged each other and I hope he never let's go.. Eventually, my mom messed it, "Who's on the door?!".. I knew that he felt kinda apprehensive about meeting my parents, even he said to me :"what if they don't like me.."

Events went so fast, my boyfriend and my parents they had good chemistry.
After, my dad rose and said that : x is so cool so, he got a surprise for both of us (me and x) ; going in trip to Dubai for a week . X got surprised, a small smile played on his lips, the words that he used em to thank my dad were like vanilla pudding..
It's was too late, x should get back home, we took a seat at the garden and we hugged ;he runs his fingers through my hair and gently guides my face closer to his, eventually leaning me in to rest my head on his chest. His other arm wraps around me. I hoped time could stop, cause I fel in secure.I made him happy that night, and it felt good. I wished I could do more...