17 and pregnant

Chapter 3

This one's a little too short for my liking, but just wasn't feeling it tonight.. I dont even like what I'm uploading now :(

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-Ryan-

I’m pregnant kept replying in my head over and over as I looked at her, silent tears strumming down her face. 

Pregnant…Pregnant….

“Ry-Ryan” Courtney whispered “S-say something”

What can I say, I though to myself. “Do you know who’s the father?” 

I’m an asshole. I really am. I knew I was her first. I knew she was a virgin, and I still slept with her. I wanted to be her first, to always be in her memory. A pussy thing to think, I know. 

She narrowed her eyes, crying forgotten, and crossed those slender arms of hers. “Really?”

I shrugged, crossing my arms as well. Yep a true asshole. I don’t know why I didn’t just say ‘so what are we planning to do now?’ or ‘I’m sorry, I know it’s mine’.

“God, you’re an asshole” voiced my own thoughts, sweetheart. She uncrossed her arms and started pacing the room. 

I took a deep breath, willing my mouth to stop spitting stupid sh!t. “I’m sorry. I know who’s the father” 

She stopped pacing and looked straight at me, raising one sexy eyebrow. 

“Craig” I tried cracking a joke. didn’t work. 

She sighed impatiently raising her arms as if saying ‘you see what I have to deal with’. “I’m sorry, I;m sorry” I walked to her grabbing her wrist gently and pulling her to me “I know I’m him” I hugged her close, trying to crush the new feelings rising inside of me. Trying to crush the new sensation that my life, as I know it, is over. 

“You don’t have to be involved” she suddenly said “I don’t expect you to. I know you have your life- football, girls, parties- I don’t want to ruin it all” Really? parties? That’s why she doesn’t want me to get involved. I tried to speak, but she rushed on “I don’t know what I’m going to do. I’ll probably keep the baby. I can’t think of an adoption or abortion. Too hard for me.” Now I stopped hugging her and looked at her green eyes. Trying to understand. 

“What are you saying?”, I asked confused.

“I’m saying” she whispered “is that I’m giving you a free pass, I guess” 

“A free pass?” what the hell does that mean? 

“Yeah, you know” she looked at me, waiting. 

“No I don’t. explain”

She tucked a lock of hair behind her ear and started. “I mean, it could be wonderful if you wanted to take a part in this. I don’t want to go through this alone, but you don’t have to. I;m giving you a pass. So just stop asking me questions and get out of the room. Go have fun, be young.”

“Go have fun?” I repeated her words, exaggerated “be young?!”

 She sniffed and nodded at me. 

“I’m not going to go have fun, or whatever” I looked at her fiercely wanting to make her understand that I'm not that type of guy. I’m not one to walk away from my problems. “I’m not going anywhere” 

“You don’t know what you’re saying” she said, turning around “when I’ll start showing and everyone will know, you won’t say the same”

“Fuck everyone” 

“And what about later? when the baby is born? will you say fuck everyone then too?”

“I’m not leaving, Court. I’m not that kind of guy”

She turned around again and looked at me in silence for a couple of minutes. “We’ll see”