The Perfect Submissive

Chapter 40

Alonzo

I know how harsh that was to have shown Jasmine what kind of man I really am but it's been a week. I didn't even consider that she has a son about the age of the little boy I've killed.

After going over it all night long I think today would be a good day to apologize and ask for her forgiveness. I know how worried she must be about all the times her son was around me and I would hate for her to think I'd hurt him. Even though I haven't showed her any different I think I owe it to her.

After showering I went to her room and knocked. My stomach twisted in knots knowing how she must feel about me. Usually she would come to my room to wake me up early but she hasn't been seen every since that incident that occurred yesterday afternoon.

I waited for what seen like eternity before the door finally creaked open. I could tell she wasn't in the mood to see me but she answered the door that has to mean she willing to hear what I had to say. She still held her glare at me as I took a seat on the edge of her bed.

"You probably don't want to hear this now but I wanted to apologize for yesterday. I wasn't in the right mind and sometimes I get out of control... what I'm trying to say is that I would never hurt your son"

"You killed a little boy and his mother" she simply stated. I sighed and closed my eyes. Of course this wasn't going to be easy and this was Abby for Christ sakes, she wouldn't make it easy.

"I had to show you that side of me. I don't want you thinking that I'm some weak fucker who lets everybody else do for him. I'm a monster Jasmine and your full of life I'm no one you should want. No one you should have Even think of wanting"

We stayed in silence for what felt like eternity before she stood up from the bed and make her way over to me. I looked up at her beautiful blues and got lost in the sea that were her eyes. She was breathtaking but I was dangerous I couldn't let her know that I wanted her just as badly as she wanted me. I can't let her win after I've tried to keep my composure for so long around her.

"You are a monster, you disgust me" she started as she tore me into pieces with her words. I knew what I've become and I'm proud but when she says it... I don't know... something snapped. I didn't want her feeling that way about me but I couldn't express my feelings for her.

"I deserve that.."

"You have no self respect. Your lonely pushing everything that wants to help you away.. it was your mother wasn't it. She didn't love Alonzo enough so now he kills mothers and children because they had a relationship that you could never have experienced"

Her words tore through me. As if she knew exactly who I was and that infuriated me. Who does she think she is to talk to me in such a way.. I'm no ones child I don't need any scolding.

"Watch it" I replied through gritted teeth. I wasn't in the right state and if I didn't contain myself I might hurt her out of anger.

"You want to scream?! Scream then! Let the whole world know who you really are. Just a motherless child seeking comfort in killing women and kids because he really wishes that was his life. To have a mother who would love and protect you! Believe me I've been there with my own mother but I never stopped striving to be better for my child!"

"That's enough! If you think I'm just going to sit here and let you continue to bash me on shit that you don't know I'll..."

"You'll what?! Shoot me also! Do it!"

My chest heaved in anger as I looked at her. She doesn't know shit but I couldn't hurt her as much as she pushed me I couldn't bring myself to hurt a hair on her head. But why?! I don't like her, she disobeys everything I say, she tries to control me!

"Fuck this!" I stand to leave but am pushed back down in the bed. She stalled my waist with her tiny hands on my chest.

"I know what you need Alonzo. Why can't you just trust me. Let me take away your pain" she whispered in my ear. I struggled against he words and fought to stay contained but this woman drive me crazy in more ways then one.

She's already changed my life since she's been here. I don't sleep with random women anymore, I don't kill off someone everyday, I don't come home late just so I can make sure she's okay but I'm reality I just want to hear her delicate voice and see her ocean like blues looking at me intensely. I wanted to control her but she would never let me... or I've never tried.

"What do you say? Will you let me have the pain that you build up inside? Will you give me all that you have? Will you be mine?"

Fuck!

How could I say anything. She wanted something I wasn't ready to give. I was....afraid of letting myself be exposed so vulnerably to her! She made living together harder then I would've ever thought. Her bing her has caused m great pain but has shown me the most affection as attention that I've always craved. She was the missing piece.

"Yes" I finally spoke the words that could make or break me into pieces. I'm hers more now then I ever was. I just hope that I won't regret this now more then I think I will.

"Finally, your all mine" she pressed her lips into mine. I was a goner from that moment on.
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Alexander

"Dad, why do we have to go back"

"Because your brother and mother is here and once we find and bring them home we won't have to step foot here again"

"Isn't she with uncle Alonzo" I whipped my head towards her.

"Who-"

"I saw the folder in your office"

"You shouldn't be looking at my personal things. And yes she staying with uncle Alonzo but only because she thinks he can protect her not because they are together. She would never betray our family like that" I sighed. I wanted Alonzo dead but if I have my Jasmine I'll leave him alone. I just hope this doesn't cause a war because I'll see to it that I come out on top with both of my children and my wonderful wife.

I can't wait until this bullshit blows over. All I have to do is convince her I've changed and she'll be mine again. Works every time.

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