Remus Lupin and the Prisoner of Azkaban

Chapter 37: Simple Gifts

For the next few days, classes went well enough; a repeat of his invitation to private boggart lessons were taken up by 8 more students from years 3 through 6, a handful from each House that sorted themselves off to Flitwick, Sprout, and McGonagall. He tried to stifle the petty side of him that took a great interest in noting that no one chose Severus, not even the Slytherins. He's about as nurturing as a moldy piece of bread, his internal James voice muttered and Remus had to shush it, sternly. There were 2 left for himself--a 6th year Slytherin girl named Reiko and a 3rd year Ravenclaw boy named Sterling that he scheduled promptly, Reiko that afternoon and Sterling the next day during lunch.

Despite his slightly traumatic first experience with Thora's lesson, their boggarts simply turned out to be fears they didn't much want to share with anyone else publicly. Reiko's had become a single rat, staring at her, hair on end and fangs bared as it hissed and she succeeded in casting Riddikulus on the first try, freezing it in a block of ice so it tipped to the ground, protruding tail thrashing. After, she admitted that the only reason she wanted it to be secret was to protect her reputation and keep her friends from teasing her. "They mean well," she assured him when he had frowned at the thought. "I would just never live down my worst fear being a rat ."

Sterling's boggart was a woman Remus didn't recognize, haggard and menacing, simply staring at him wordlessly with knobbly legs and burning eyes. White lipped, the boy failed to cast Riddikulus the first 3 times, until she finally dissolved into iridescent bubbles. With a final, shaky 'ha', he chased the boggart back into the case. The boy had looked so shaken, Remus let him speak first and, after a few moments, Sterling had looked up from the ground and asked if he could go.

"Do you feel that you understand how to perform the Charm? Or would you like to try again?"

Mutely, he had shaken his head, hand like a vice on his wand. It gave Remus pause, but he had eventually said, gently, "If you would like to practice again...or talk about it, you can come find me."

Sterling had nodded and left without a word.

Seeing Thora again in class had been an odd experience. Part of him was deeply ashamed of having failed to properly instruct her in her lesson and some other, more unconscious part of him now seemed to associate her with everything he feared at Hogwarts--someone who liked and trusted him only because they did not know what he was. She symbolized everything he could lose if she realized he was the monster that she feared more than anything. He made sure to smile at her when she came in and she had grinned back and said, "I'm always relieved, now, when it's you and not Professor Snape at your desk!"

Ah, and that. He supposed he should talk to Dumbledore about his vendetta against his classes--or even talk Severus himself, if he thought it would make any difference,which he didn't. Perhaps that was the cowards way out. The problem being that even on a good day, he was just too tired to have to deal with the mental gymnastics and verbal sparring that came with anything longer than a brief exchange of barbs with the man. Trying to convince Severus to act like an adult and stop trying to expose his secret through barely-subliminal teaching methods felt more daunting than coming up with a whole new curricula. It wasn't that Remus was afraid or even intimidated by him--it was probably more that part of him agreed with Snape that someone as dangerous as him shouldn't be allowed to teach at Hogwarts. Not a very convincing argument. Once more , he reasoned. If he gets assigned to cover for me and he harrasses the students one more time, I will talk to Dumbledore about it.

Despite the rather disastrous start to the week, things were settling again and existence no longer felt quite so dire. Classes fell back into their rhythm and so did he. Thursday came quickly, and with it, Harry's third Dementor lesson in the evening, long after the sunset had tipped the freezing day into an even more frigid night. Luckily, this was the best he had felt in all the times he had had a lesson with him, so he was able to arrive early and set up before Harry even showed up. When he did, Remus smiled broadly at him. "Good evening, Harry, how was your day?"