In the Interlude

Chapter 48 - Summertime Sadness

"Are you ready to eat your weight in cupcakes?" asked Sofia, setting the box of calorie bombs on the coffee table. It was a Friday afternoon on yet another hot and sweaty August day.

They had spoken on the phone once or twice since Aïcha came back from London and then Bordeaux, just enough for Sofia to know that her friend was not doing fine despite her incessant claims otherwise.

So, here she was, paying her friend an impromptu visit, bearing enough cupcakes to sustain a whole regiment. "Where is Mia?" asked Sofia, looking around the living room. The last time she was here, they had spent the day unpacking Aïcha's boxes.

"She's back to Bordeaux, with her grandparents. They're taking her and her cousin for a week of surfing in Hossegor."

"Hah, lucky her! Sea, Surf and Sun. Can it get any better than that?"

"Tell me about it." Aïcha came back from the kitchen with napkins and sparkling lemonade and sat on the floor facing her friend.

They chatted a while, sipping lemonade, nibbling on cupcakes and getting up to speed about everything that happened since the last time they saw each other.

"And you haven't spoken to him since?" asked Sofia.

Aïcha shook her head. "No. No calls, no texts."

"Did you try to get in touch with him?"

"Why would I do that?" She continued with a shaky voice, "It was my decision to leave. There's nothing more to say." Her eyes didn't leave the untouched cupcake in her hand.

"Oh, honey. You don't seem okay with this."

Aïcha exhaled, putting the cupcake on the coffee table between her and Sofia. "You know, things were not supposed to go like this. I was not supposed to fall in love with him. And now..." she trailed off.

Her friend sat on the floor next to her. "And now what?" asked Sofia in a soft voice, squeezing her friend's hand.

Aïcha inhaled deeply, her eyes tearing up. "Now? It just, it's so much..." She put her hand over her heart as she said the words. "It hurts so much." She closed her eyes and swallowed. "It's like my heart was ripped out of my chest, only I'm the one who did the ripping, all by myself."

Sofia's heart ached for Aïcha. She loved her friend as the sister she never had. But she didn't know how to help her, how to make her realise she was making a big mistake.

Ever since Idriss had passed away, Sofia watched her friend crawl into a hole, putting up a brave face for her daughter and everyone around. But she knew that below that thin veil her grief was gruelling, stealing her appetite for life. And when she met Tom, she saw bits and pieces of the old Aïcha coming back. That made her hopeful that maybe, just maybe, she would give herself permission to live again.

"I hate to ask this but, is this really what you want?"

Aïcha looked at her friend. She always appreciated her directiveness. "It doesn't matter what I want. I have nothing to offer him and I can't bring another man into Mia's life. Can you imagine? Surprise! Here's your new daddy!" She scoffed and shook vigorously her head. They remained silent for a moment before she added, "I can't do that to Idriss, Mia or Tom. I just can't."

Sofia frowned, feeling an overwhelming desire to shake her friend. Idriss would've never wanted for Aïcha to sacrifice herself for his sake or Mia's, she thought. She didn't know Tom, but she suspected he didn't appreciate someone making the decision for him. As for Mia, well, she surely deserved a say in all this, right?

Sofia's fingers moved to the cupcakes on the coffee table. She stopped before taking another one. "Can I say something? And this comes from a place of deep love and total humility of... well, of me fully acknowledging that I don't know what it's like to lose a husband." She took a deep breath before adding, "Don't let the death of Idriss become the death of you. Don't shut your heart forever. What if Mia was ready for another man in her mum's life? Someone who made her mum, who makes you happy and giddy and excited by life again?"