Thoughts

End of August

I'm so terrified of school starting, not because I'll have to do work, but because I'm in AP english and psychology and I'm so anxious about it. I'm going into junior year. They say that's the hardest year.

My anxiety is getting bad again. Drawing on my skin helps, I think. I need to see if I can bring up my medication for the school year.

I have to drive to school every morning. That's horrifying, because what if I'm too tired to drive? I already hate driving as it is. What about driving while panicking about social interaction?

I'm actually and incredibly happy person. Just anxious, is all. I always say that my anxiety caused me to mature at a young age. The therapist told me that I can't go to my mom and ask for reassurance about my OCD thoughts. I was 13 then, and in those (almost) 4 years, I've figured out so many outlets to find happiness.

I love photography, but I get so discouraged when I see photographers that are more talented than me, but younger than me. It still makes me happy.

Marching band literally changed my life, and I've never been so grateful for it. My only advice is to stay in band, kids.

At night, my cat plays fetch with her toy mouse. She brings it to my room, drops it next to my bed, meows until I throw it, chases after it, and brings it back.

I think I've found happiness amongst anxiety.