1995

XIII

Tony.
I looked at Hazel as I talked to her about my child. She looked so interested and smiled when I mentioned small things I loved about my daughter. I turned my head and looked at her as we laid side by side.

I leaned in towards her and planted a kiss on her soft lips. She caressed my face as our kiss grew wilder and deeper. She struggled to keep up with me. We both sat up as she began removing her clothes. I removed my shirt and my pants.

I examined her naked body and felt myself getting aroused. Just as I was about to enter her I heard knocking at my door. I sucked my teeth and continued to ignore it until I heard loud banging. I snatched my basketball shorts out of my drawer and kicked it with my foot before closing it. I snatched my room door open and stomped straight to my front door.

"What!?" I said rolling my eyes so hard I began to have a headache. I opened my eyes to see Daniel standing before me. He looked more angry then I was he just pushed me aside and headed towards my room. "Where the fuck is my weed?!" He said bursting through my door. I quickly looked at Hazel as she hurried and covered her body with my sheets. Daniel looked at her for a minute examining her body then looking at her face. "Don't trust these bitches, Tony. It'll fuck you up in the long run." He turned his nose up at her and snatched the weed out of my drawer.

I followed him, dead on his heels as he sat down in my living room. "What the fuck is wrong with you? and why you in here disrespecting my girlfriend?" I sat across from him as she slid the lighter out his pocket and lit up. "Alicia cleaned out all my damn accounts... I don't have shit to my name son! I would have called but she got my phone.. I didn't even marry this bitch yet and she did this shit all under my nose... I can't believe I trusted this bitch." He shook his head as tears began to form in his eyes.

"Daniel, I got you man.. You always got a place here come on now I got money and accounts saved up so don't ever hesitate in asking for anything. Alicia's wrong and you already know we're going to get to the bottom of this."

" I know man but the last thing my mama thought me before she died was to let nobody ever fool me... I look dumb spending money on a wedding that was never going to happen."

Me and Daniel sat in silence as I got him comfortable to the point where he was drifting off to sleep. I walked back to my room to see Hazel laying on her stomach flipping through my picture book with her clothes back on. I laid on top of her with my head resting on her back. "I was so damn ugly in college." I smelled her Vanilla scent and kissed her on her cheek. "No you wasn't."

Xavier .

I sat in my office and looked at Hazel's contact. I wanted to call her but I was afraid that she'd tell me she was happy where she was at. I regret the fact that I never gave her a chance to explain or keep her job but i knew if I continued to let her stay I'd just fall for her more.

I pressed the phone button and I heard the phone ringing and then I heard a male voice talking in the background but I quickly noticed she had to be in an office or something. "Hello?" She said sounding fresh and mellow.

"This is Xavier, I been meaning to talk to you like seriously, not funny shit. I was wrong to come off as strong as i did but I hope you can forgive me. I don't know you're history with this guy but i admit I was and still am jealous. I thought what we were doing was forming into something eternal and I was liking you more and more and your family liked me but now that I'm aware that you have some type of relationship with him I understand. You can come back to the club whenever or I could connect with anyone with a career path that you want. If i can't have you i could at least be a supportive friend."

"Thank you. I'm at the airport headed to Atlanta but whenever I come back I'll be there. I'm about to head up i'm glad you called.. see you soon."

I looked at Tony as he held his daughter and his baby momma kept staring me down. "He don't care about you." She mouthed to me then walked over to him holding his child like they were the perfect family. I wasn't sweating it though I'm not fighting for my spot with her or her baby. That was a war i was already prepared to loose.

I looked over as Tony started talking to us about our plane tickets and the way we're were going to be sitting. I was getting uncomfortable just thinking about it. i decided this little baby mama thing ain't for me. "Tony, I'm sorry ... I gotta go Ava says she needs me I'll catch up to you some other time." I grabbed my luggage and pressed the button for the handle so I could wheel myself back to my car. It was fifteen minutes until boarding time and I heard running when i was five feet away from my car. I was hoping it was somebody else running for something but i was wrong.

Tony.
"What's gotten into you? I just texted Ava and she said everything's fine." She stood there biting on her lip.

"I didn't want to talk about this with everybody now i'm glad that we're alone so i can be honest. I don't wanna go to atlanta anymore .. I see your girl still has feelings for you. Keep your family together Tony i'm not good at handling things like this. I always said I'll forever love you I mean that but clearly your baby mama wants you. I won't wanna have to fight for my spot."

He nodded taking in everything I said. "I love you so much." Was all he said. He pulled me into a bear hug and kisses my on my cheek. "I don't regret my daughter but I wish there was a way we could really stay together." I smiled "Me too."

He watched me get into my car and I drove off. By the time I whipped around He was already back into the airport.

I came back into my house which was full of moans and groans. My bitch was getting it in I was happy for her but happy that I wanted to excuse myself to go shop I needed to wined and dined i'm just a bad bitch so I decided to call one of the classiest dressing women.. My sister August.

Six Chanel Bags later and I was back home eating the food Ava made for me, herself, and her man. She popped a bottle of Chardonnay as always and today I settled with water.

I thought of Tony..

Do y'all think i was wrong? Selfish? I said talking to my inner self. Then i quickly shut myself down. I make my own damn decisions.. my entire life all it's been was me me me and i was determined to keep it that way.. Yeah i'm a bitch, I know.

I wasn't really thinking offensive. I just want someone all someone to myself I don't want there to be anything holding me back.