Life Is Ecstacy - Yoongi FF

Work In Hell

Yoongi POV

I step through the rotating door into the giant building I work at, wanting nothing more than to be back with
Y/n, instead of here and working, even though she won't look me in the eye out of embarrassment.

I don't regret kissing her, but I'm scared of breaking her. I want to show her that she's worth more than death. I want to show her how beautiful the world is. I want to prove to her that it's going to be okay.
I just don't know if confessing my feelings to her is the best way to do that.

I sigh, giving the receptionist a quick wave hello, without actually looking at them, making my way to the elevator.
I think about Y/n as I ride the elevator up, I daydream about her lips as I get off the elevator and onto my floor.
I move to my office to see a new pile of files to check over and add to lying on my desk and breath in the stale, mind-numbing air, wishing I was back on my couch, Y/n's head resting on my chest, her warmth moving through my veins as I breath her in.

I sigh once again as I sit down in my chair, trying my hardest to get my mind off her and onto my work. As I work through my paperwork, I listen to music. Rap music, mostly.
When I was crazy and young, I used to dream of being a rapper.
Fame was always on my mind: spitting fire as adoring crowds cheer for me, while sold out stadiums filled up with lights, held up just for me.

I roll my neck after I feel a cramp coming on.
Damn, I'm only twenty five and I feel like and old man! I'm not getting any younger sitting in this chair, that's for sure...

I check the time to see that I'm actually halfway through my break. I huff, picking myself up and making my way to the kitchen to get myself some coffee and a biscuit, hoping not to run into her.

I open the door, looking around to see no one present. I give out a breath of relief as I walk up to the kettle, switching it on and grabbing the tin of cookies from the top shelf.
As I'm making my coffee, however, a certain someone I was hoping to avoid enters.

We make eye contact and she instantly goes into thot mode.
With a quick darkening of her eyes and voice, hinting at sultry intentions she shifts the whole atmosphere from calm to awkward - especially because we're the only people here.

"Why, hello, Yoongi~"
She says, moving closer towards me, trying her hardest to seduce me my swaying her hips in a way that used to get me going.

"Jihae."
I say, cold and uncaring, moving myself to sit down at the boring old table provided.
My days of playing around 'just because' are over, they shouldn've ended before I met Y/n, but she's even more reason to stop now.

Jihae sits down next to me, pulling her chair closer so she can rest her hand on my knee.
She pouts at me, giving me her best aegeo - something she was never truly good at.
"Why are you so cold these days, Suga? Do you not like me anymore? You used to~"

She starts to move her hand onto my thigh and I scoff, getting up from my seat and grabbing my mug, moving towards the door without a word.

I hear her call out to me, sounding slightly desperate, raising my ego to think I used to do that to woman before I grew up.
"Wait! Please, just one more time! I swear it will be worth it~ It's not like you're married or anything..."

I turn my head slightly so that she could hear the important words I was about to say.
"Don't call me Suga, I no longer answer to that name."

And I leave her there, standing alone in the kitchen.

***

I keep working until the day ends and then some. I don't even realise the sun has set until I look up from my computer for the first time in a few hours.
I stretch my arms up, belonging them over my shoulders and hearing my back crack with a satisfying 'pop'.

I check the time on my phone and see that it's nearly eleven.
I sigh, rubbing my eyes.
Everyone has probably left already...
Y/n is most likely asleep... God, I'm tired...

I get up, picking up my things and making my way to the elevator, leaving the building and making my way home in the car.
As soon as I step in the car, it connects to my phone via Bluetooth.

My phone starts talking through the car, male Siri informing me of current notifications on my phone that might need to be tended to.
"One new voice message from "Kitten". Do you choose to play this message?"

I smile to myself as I press play on the message, Y/n's voice slightly distorted but still filling up the car with a beautiful warmth.
"Hi, Yoongi... um... sorry to call you while you're at work, just wanted to tell you that dinner's in the oven and that I've gone to bed already... See you in the morning... Bye..."

I chuckle to myself as her small voice fades off. She really doesn't like thinking she's disturbed me from my work and she likes to avoid phone calls in general.
I smile just thinking about her.
She's too cute...

I sped up my driving by a small portion in a desperate attempt to feel like I was going faster than I was, when, in reality, I was toeing the speed limit.
I just wanted to get home to her...

When I eventually do get home, I walk through the door as quietly as possible and make my way to the kitchen.
On the cooking bench there's a small sticky note where Y/n has done her best to write in Korean for me.
Some words are spelled wrong, but it's very neat. I smile.

'Hi, Yoongi! Your dinner is in the oven! I hope you're not too tired from work. Could you wake me up in the morning? I need to ask you something.'
I read the note over a few times, wondering what she wanted to ask me.

I shrug it off and I go over to the oven which is on the lowest setting so my food will be kept warm.
I pull out a plate covered with aluminum foil, the heat stinging my hands slightly from the warmth of the plate, but it's not enough to warrant any real concern.
I pull back the foil to see a full meal of beef steak and vegetables.

I smile to myself as I think I about Y/n making this for me.
She's so sweet...
But then a thought comes to my mind.

But what if she's only doing this to stay here? What if the maknae has already taken her away from me? Is that why she hasn't looked me in the eye since our kiss..?

I shake it all off. Y/n is too sweet for that and we have enough trust in each other that, if she did fall for someone, she would tell me.

But what if she does like Jungkook more than you?
A small voice asks, from the void of my mind.
Will you support them? Your best friend and the one you love... Could you be happy for them..?

I sigh, too tired to think about that right now.
I eat my food standing up, qickly downing it before washing the dirty dishes and going to bed.
On my way, I pass Y/n's room and I stop for a second.

I could go in there right now, wake her up with a kiss and tell her that I love her. I could hold her in my arms and tell her I want her in my life for years to come...
I take a step towards the door, reaching out for the handle...

But I stop myself. I can't do this to her. She's depressed... I remember what that was like, I never felt good enough for anyone. I refused love and help, thinking I didn't deserve it.
Now, of course, I know better, but she still might not. I need to help her...
Her well being and mental health comes first...

I walk away to my room, showering before getting into bed in nothing but some boxers and some sweat pants.
I drift off to sleep, thinking of Y/n.

Why do you have to torture me this way..?
I think to myself as sleep drags me down into a pool of forgoten dreams.
You're so close but I'm not allowed to touch you... Why must you tempt me..?

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