I'm Spongebob? (Stony AU)

Chapter 18: He's a Patrick

"Hey, take a picture of me and Squidward!" Tony said handing his phone over to Bruce.

"About that..." Bucky said, catching Steve's face momentarily falter at the sound of his unwanted nickname. He recovered quickly, before anyone could notice, but of course, Bucky was already trained in noticing these things about his best friend. "Why Squidward?"

Steve was trying to kill Bucky with his eyes, without being too obvious about it. He failed as Bucky continued.

"I just mean, there are so many Spongebob characters to chose from you know?"

"Oh," Tony said, sitting up straight. The music and laughter seemed to quiet down as all eyes turned to him, two pairs, belonging to Thor and Clint, being very confused on the new topic.

"Well. Squidward because he's this guy that has his life all figured out," Tony said, Clint raised his eyebrows, sending a side eye at Bucky. Were they talking about Squidward from Spongebob?

"Oh. Well, Steve doesn't really like it." Bucky said, straightfaced. Sam elbowed him, not the tactic they had agreed to earlier.

"Oh?" Tony said, concern flooding his face as he looked over at a flustered Steve.

"I-" was all Steve was able to muster out.

"I've never meant it as a bad thing," Tony explained. "Well, not about you anyways. We said I'm Spongebob right? So you asked what your relationship was to me in this position."

"We are talking about the cartoon of the creature that lives in a pineapple under the sea?" Thor scrunched his eyebrows looking over at Clint who promptly shushed him.

"Well..." Tony looked around at Steve and his audience. "Um. Squidward is someone who has put up with all of Spongebobs crazy antics. Even though you and he are very different, I guess I see myself as a nuisance to you that you have to take care of, sometimes, is all. Or something." Tony said shrugging his shoulders and downing his soda.

"What? No! If anything I'm the nuisance." Steve said.

"What kind of reverse No I love YOU more shit is this?" Clint whispered.

"I'm the one who made you get up at three am to go pick up my sorry drunk ass. And made you miss work. And dropped in on you, not just in person but with calls too, on multiple occasions."

"None of those were nuisances!" Steve said, staring Tony down. "I love spending time with you!" He said rather forcefully.

"Well, it's settled then," Bucky spoke up. "He's a Patrick."

"You gonna explain what just happened, to us?" Thor asked in a hushed whisper, tapping Sam on the shoulder. Clint and he were looking at him expectantly.

Sam nodded, whispering back, "tonight at the hotel."

"So," Rhodey said breaking the overall silence that had fallen on the bus. "Now that that's settled..." He looked over at Tony and raised his eyebrows, nodding towards Steve.

Tony didn't show any signs of stirring. His brain was still processing the information of all that had just happened and readying for a reboot.

"Ah. Yes." Bruce said, stepping in, in a voice that made Rhodey cringe, "My. Party." He smiled widely at Tony.

Tony was starting to blink again, Rhodey noted, which meant he was slowly coming back to his normal processing speed.

"So. Anthony. Have you..." nothing, Rhodey looked at his hopeless friend, then turned to the other guests that were just gaping at the three of them. "See, Bruce is being awarded this... thing, at this one school. And Tony was-"

"Oh, what award?" Clint asked.

"What school?" Sam quickly followed.

Shit . Journalists. Rhodey looked over at a still motionless Tony, "Um... you know I am horrible with names, Bruce do-"

"Hulkas Academy," Tony said, rebooting. "It's a sponsor recognition award, they are hosting a small dinner and ceremony in his honor."

"Congratulations!" Thor said, clasping the arm of a sheepish Bruce.

"Hulkas, interesting... I haven't heard any chatter, have you?" Clint said, eyeing Sam, who shook his head no.

"Oh well it was a very last minute thing, and Bruce is a very humble guy and wanted to keep it under wraps," Rhodey explained. "And well Tony..."

"I," Tony said, looking at back at Steve for the first time since the man had declared he loved spending time with him, his heart skipped a beat. Shit."I... Wanted to see if you wanted to go with me?" He managed, quickly adding, "all of you." turning to look at the rest of the group in the party bus, turning before giving Steve's face a chance to react to the initial question, scared it might portray something he wouldn't like.

Rhodey internally facepalmed.

Thor nodded automatically, the rest of the group following.

"When is it?" Bucky asked.

"Uh. Next week." Bruce said, nodding at Rhodey. They had never established a day. The whole point of it was to get Steve used to the idea of Tony and him going as each others date before the fake event was, unfortunately, " canceled".

"Is anyone covering it?" Clint asked as Sam pulled out his phone.

"Um no," Rhodey said, side-eying Bruce.

"It would make for a nice article, something uplifting to give to the community." Sam said as he looked up from his phone, "turns out I do have a contact at Hulkas Academy, I can get in contact with them to sort out the details."

"NO!" Bruce and Rhodey yelled in sync. Tony scrunched his eyebrows together, amateurs.

"Bruce is a very reserved man, he doesn't like attention. That's why we only have need to know people at Hulkas in the loop. It's a closed ceremony, limited number of chairs, just to please the board of directors, make them feel like they are able to give something back to those who donate."

"Oh. A limited number of seats?" Thor asked munching on some of the popcorn.

"Well yes," Rhodey interjected before Tony could respond. This was their chance to get things back on track. "You see we were all given a plus one option, you know, to bring a date. And well, Tony... Tony Stark here..." he turned to Tony, waiting for him to finish.

A/N

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