I'm Spongebob? (Stony AU)

21

They were seated at a big round table with a turning center to share the meal. There were 7 comfy egg-shaped chairs placed comfortably around it.

"Hey." Tony caught Steve's arm as the rest of the table got up to get their third cup of soft serve.

Steve sat back down, nodding at everyone else to go on ahead.

"Um. Earlier. On the bus. Well, what I wanted to ask. What I meant to say, was... would you be my date? To Bruce's... thing."

Steve's mouth opened, then closed.

"Or not! You don't have to. It's- It's no big deal. It doesn't even have to be a date. We don't have to call it a date. I mean I would like to call it a date. You know what... don't worry about it. Let's not make a thing of this. Forget I said anything. Let's go get our ice creams"

Steve quickly grasped Tony's wrist as he stood to escape.

"No!"

"No? Okay. Th-that's-that's, that's fine. I understand. I'm sorry. Can we please forget I even mentioned the whole thing? I just-"

"No!"

"Ok." Tony quickly looked down and slumped back into the chair, suddenly he didn't care for any more ice cream.

"No, I mean yes."

Tony looked like a lost puppy.

"You want me to be your date. Your date date?"

"Yes."

"I-I would be honored."

"Really?!" Tony's eyes went as wide as Steve's were, his grin was wider.

"Of course. But...why me?"

Tony laughed.

"I mean... you barely know me."

"What? You think we barely know each other?"

"I mean..." Steve looked down and frowned.

"Really? I feel like you really know me. I mean sure. It hasn't been long, what three weeks? But... well, I definitely feel like we've formed a relationship. I consider you a very close friend. I hope you consider me one two."

"Of course I do."

"Why do you feel like I barely know you? What... how can I get to know you better?"

"That's not what I meant. I guess. I'm just. Why me? You have your whole pick of people. People you probably like better, people who know how to act around the other guests. People who have as much recognition and prestige as you do."

"There are definitely people who I like. Who makes good conversation. Who have recognition and prestige among my colleagues. But none that I like the way I like you... Non-platonically. None that make my heart beat as fast as you do. Make me laugh as hard as you do. Keep me up at night like you do. Occupy my thoughts like you do. Make me blush like you do. Make me say cheesy—things like this—like you do. You keep me on my feet. See through my bullshit, and don't put up with it. You are sassy as hell. AND I could talk to you for hours and never get tired. You're an amazing artist. You're an amazing human being. Surprisingly you're not self-righteous or self observed. And I would very much like to take you on a date. Oh, and also, you're very hot."

Steve chuckled. His face was full on red. "You really think all that? About me?"

"Do you want me to repeat myself? Maybe this time I'll remember all the words to the speech I practiced a couple of hundred times with Jarvis."

Steve beamed. "I would love to be your date."

"Really?"

"Yes. And I can ramble on about you too. I already have a couple of hundred times to just about everyone I'm close to."

Tony chuckled, then looked beyond Steve. "The groups been lingering in the corner with their ice creams in hand long enough. But I would love to keep this conversation going. Maybe... tonight? At the hotel. We could sneak away for a walk along the strip?"

"Okay." Steve half expected Bucky to shake him awake and for him to find himself passed out in the party bus and being told they arrived at the restaurant.