[OLD] God or Goddess? (Lady Loki Oneshots)

Lady Loki is not weak

I have a feeling that these titles are getting cringy... TOO LATE TO BACK OUT NOW!
Please, you're writing is always cringy...
Oh hi Zilli... it's been a while. Haven't missed you
The feeling is mutual
Riiiight.... What are you doing here? You're my negative feelings and impulses... You only appear when- Wait! NO no no no.
Oh yes yes yes yes
No! I refuse to do bad stuff to my precious green mischievous bean.
Really? "Green mischievous bean?"
Anyways, you know angsty/whumpy stories do well.
And you get to watch your audience suffer...
No Infinity War tho, right?
Oh GOD no. I'm not that heartless...
Good. Well, I suppose a little angst couldn't hurt...
Excellent
Just, don't go overboard...

Oh don't worry about it.

Let the games begin       

Why couldn't they have just left when they were supposed to? Loki risks her life for these idiots, but they can't do the bare minimum? Not that they'd care. She was barely more than an Avengers charity case to them. That one person who killed so many people and was being 'reformed' by the avengers.

Speaking of risking her life, a few moments ago she was surrounded by said idiots nearly being crushed by 800 pounds of rubble for a good 20 minutes. Not to mention the green, glowing shield she made was draining her energy.

Children being hugged by their parents, holding on for dear life to their mothers or fathers, not trusting one bit that the person going through all this would actually save them. Not because she couldn't, but because she didn't want to. She remembered vividly one child with blue eyes, blond pigtails, and a shirt with a green monster truck on it. The little girl stared at her with fear of hurt. Her mother bringing her close and saying "It's alright Emily."

They were thankfully able to find a way out, but not before Loki herself was trapped under more rubble. Not that they cared. "One less killer" was probably their thought process

Being in this situation is as pleasant as it sounds. Probably even worse.

She was all alone, in the dark. All sounds beyond her breathing and increasingly rapid heartbeat were muffled, as if she were underwater.

As if she were back in the void. Space. Drifting.

She attempted to push the thought away, trying instead to focus on the shield that was slowly shrinking and glitching.

Would one of them care enough to retrieve someone? They probably never would. They would never. The rubble further weighed her down as her heartbeat and laboured breaths quickened.

Alone in the dark. Alone in the void. Dying and no one caring. No one believing she truly wished to help.

The dam behind her eyes threatened to release, which sent a new, louder thoughts and memories in her head.

   Lectures and speeches on how to be a ruler. Strong . Confident. Be strong. Be confident. Don't be weak.

Weak. Alone. Like she was.

It hurt to breathe and there was a dull ringing in her ears. Focus barely on the shield as it slowly came down and crushed her bit by bit. It was all too much. Too much.

Her floodgates crumbled. Her rational thinking fled with her tears. She sobbed. She screamed. She cried. The voices only getting louder in her head every time she resisted the rivers on her cheeks.

   She couldn't focus. She couldn't hear, she couldn't see. But she could feel. It felt like Hell. She felt like she was dying. Just make it stop.

  Something snapped. It stopped. She let go. Let go of resistance. Let go of the shield. She collapsed. She surrendered.

   The weight was barely felt, as was the pain. The tears were all that she noticed, the thing she feared and had kept in for so long. Her sobs had quieted at that point, scarcely a hiccup. Above all else, she noticed a sense of peace.

  To cry, to scream, to sob, it felt amazing. Was this another of Odin's punishments? To deprive her of this for so long? For the first time in many moons, she no longer cared.

   As she let the darkness fall over her like a warm blanket, she was at peace.

        What? That can't be it!
       You let me write a chapter, this is what you get!    
No one wants this! This is what I get for giving you power....
       I suppose this could continue... IF you let me help!    
I don't know what this will create...but let's do it!
       Perfect        

        (part 2 coming soon)