Nick & Bailey

17. Bailey

Mandy and her family are coming back today from their annual ski trip, and I practically jump with excitement when she texts me that she's home. I'm at her house within ten minutes.

They've been gone for two weeks, and I've been dying to fill her in on my current issues. It was all too much to put in a text, and I know she hates to talk on the phone. I usually fill her in on everything in my life within minutes, and it's been killing me not to talk to her.

I exchange pleasantries with my aunt and uncle and ask them how their trip was before locking Mandy and I in her bedroom.

"There is so much I need to tell you," I say as she flops down on her bed, looking for any excuse to avoid unpacking per usual.

I tell her all about Nick, starting with the fight with his stepdad and the fact he moved in and ending with the kiss that we had a week ago.

"Whoa. So, like, what does that mean? Are you guys like together?" She asks when I'm done.

"No. At least I don't think so. He practically pushed me off of him when we were kissing, and we haven't spoken since he left my room that morning."

"Dude, Ian is going to freak out."

"He's not going to find out," I say sternly. "Mandy, you can't tell anyone, please."

She scoffs, "Shut up. You know I won't."

She's right. "I know. I think I'm just paranoid."

"So, like, what the hell are you going to do? I mean, you guys live together."

I shrug. "I have no fucking clue. So far, we've been doing a great job of avoiding each other. But we definitely can't keep kissing each other. The fear of being caught is driving me insane. Did I tell you I gave Nick a hickey on accident? Ian called him out on it the other day, and I thought I was going to have a heart attack."

"Damn, Bailey, I never knew you were such a freak!" She teases, "But what did Nick say?"

"Well after looking at me awkwardly for a second, he mumbled something about not needing to tell Ian his every movement. The funny thing is that it never even occurred to Ian that it could have come from me, even though he knows we slept in the same room...alone."

Mandy shakes her head. "That dude is seriously clueless."

"I think he just trusts us," I say and a fresh stab of guilt hits me.

I need to change the subject. "Anyway how was your trip?"

"Not nearly as exciting as your time has been, but I did meet a guy..."

I laugh because I'm not surprised. Mandy is truly beautiful, and her looks are only complemented by her piercings and radical hair style choices. Guys are always throwing themselves at her, but she has never had a boyfriend nor has she ever wanted one.

Her goal has always been similar to Ian's, to get out of this one-horse town. She's sees a boyfriend as someone who would only drag her down. When I think of some of my exes, I can't say I blame her.

Of course, that doesn't stop her from having far more sexual experience than me.

"His name's Mike, and he's in college, but he's thinking of taking a year off to travel Europe. Isn't that amazing?"

"You sound like you may really like this guy." I've never heard her talk about a guy so enthusiastically before.

"I can't believe I'm saying this, but I do. We've been texting all day even though I just saw him yesterday," she pauses with a dreamy look on her face. "Oh! And he's able to make me orgasm faster than a speeding bullet."

I'm shocked that wasn't the first thing she told me about him. "Okay well where does Superman live?"

"That's the best thing, he's only twenty minutes from here."

I continue to listen to her praising her wonder-boy, grateful for the distraction. My mind has been on only one thing for the past week—make that almost two weeks—Nick.

I went to a New Years Eve get-together at my friend, Vanessa's house. It was only a few of us, not a huge party, so I was excited to have a Nick-free night. At 11:30, though, Ian and Nick came strolling in.

I have no idea what Nick did while he was there because I did everything in my power to avoid looking at him, including holding Vanessa's hair back from the toilet while she vomited up Jell-O shots.

By the time I returned to the party, it was after midnight. Amanda, a junior from the cheer squad, stopped me. "I kissed your brother at midnight. I hope that's okay."

I assured her that I didn't give a shit, my brother has kissed half the girls in our class—although I'm not sure if she appreciated that last bit. It did make me wonder, however, if Nick had kissed anyone. The thought made my stomach queasy, and I left shortly after. Happy New Year to me.

Driving home, I had a revelation. Is this going to be my life now? Everything revolving around Nick? I can't have fun with my friends or even think straight in my own house?

I'm just going to have to find a way to deal with it. I'll avoid him when I can, and when I can't, I'll fake it. If I pretend I don't care about him long enough—that every time I see his lips I don't think about how soft yet strong they felt against mine—then it will eventually be true, right?

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