Nick & Bailey

29. Bailey

"Bailey! Your dad and I are leaving now, and Ian had to be there early, would you be able to ride with Nick?" My mom asks as I'm walking down the stairs.

"Yes, she can." I hear from behind me. Nick is in a suit and tie, holding his cap and gown in his hands. This is the first time I've seen him since yesterday morning. He looks at me nervously, wondering if I will agree to ride with him.

I turn back to her. "Yeah, no problem, Mom."

As much I don't want to be alone with Nick, I know we need to talk. I, at least, have some things I need to say.

"Thank you, you two. We need to go pick up Bee, so I'll see you there." She blows a kiss as my father waves us goodbye.

Nick and I look at each other, and we both take a deep breath. Without speaking, we walk outside and climb into Nick's truck.

The drive to school is only a few minutes, so I get to the point. "Listen, Nick..."

I'm interrupted when he says "Bailey" at the same time.

"Please, can I talk first?" I ask. I've memorized what I want to say all morning, and I want to get it off my chest. Nick nods.

"Okay," I take a deep breath. "I still don't think I remember everything about that night, but most of it has come back to me. And I just want to say...I'm sorry. I remember some of the awful things I said to you, about you being a fuck-up, among other things, I'm sure. I feel awful. It makes me sick to think about."

Nick is looking at the road, but his mouth is hanging open. "Bailey, are you kidding me? Do you remember why you were pissed at me?"

"Yes," I say quickly, not wanting to relive it. "I do. But Nick, now that I've calmed down, I know I had no right to be mad at you. I think you said it yourself, I'm not your girlfriend. You can do what you want."

We've reached the student parking lot, and Nick is silent while he searches for a spot for his truck. As soon as we stop moving, I reach for my door handle.

"Wait. I'm not done talking," Nick says. I let go and turn around to face him. It's tough because I don't want him to see me cry. I'm not to that point yet, but I can feel the burn in my eyes. When we look at each other, he smiles slightly, his face softening. "You're kind of unbelievable, you know that? I fuck up royally, and you're the one apologizing."

He gives a humorless laugh. "But Bailey, you had every right to be mad. You should have said everything you did, hell, you should have said more. I fucked up. I would give anything to take it back. I'm sorry."

He reaches across the bench seat and touches my hand. Instinctively, I recoil, bringing my hand to my chest. He looks like I slapped him.

In the corner of my eye, I see a group of girls in caps and gowns walking our direction, toward the gym. They don't see Nick and I, but they will soon. "We should go. It will look suspicious if anyone sees us."

"You're right." I hear the defeat in his voice.

"Nick, we're good, right? We can go back to being friends?" I'm not ready to be kissing him again, but I also don't want him completely out of my life like before.

He nods, sadly, and we both step outside.

I'm sitting on an uncomfortable, metal chair on the gym floor surrounded by my fellow students, all of us in royal blue caps and gowns. We're sitting in alphabetical order, so I have Mandy on one side of me, and Nick on the other. Ian is going to give a speech as the valedictorian, so he's sitting on the stage. Otherwise, it would be the four us, as usual.