Where she is right - The story of Dís, daughter of kings.

25

He did not notice something was wrong until he opened his eyes sometime later, still breathing heavily and saw her silent tears.

"Alwa, what is it? Did it hurt again?", he asked dismayed and not without feeling instantly guilty.

She smiled in tears and said:

"Only the heart."

Confused he pondered about her answer, until he suddenly realized what he had done. Ashamed and groaning he buried his face in the pillow and pulled the blanket over him. She tugged at the blanket but he held tight. At last he emerged from under the blankets.

"I am so sorry. Did I actually say her name?", he asked, contrite.

She nodded and wiped away her tears.

"I mean, it is not like I would not have known it", she said.

"Mahal, Alwa, forgive me. I don't want...", he began, but broke off in the middle of the sentence.

"What is it you do not want? My love?", she asked.

"Oh, Alwa", he sighed, burying his face in the pillows again.

She moved closer to him, stroked his hair to one side tenderly and kissed his shoulder.

"I do not want to hurt you", he whispered.

"I can not command my heart to feel otherwise. Just as you can not either", she whispered back and pulled the blankets over both of them.

"I will better leave", the king said, leaning on his elbows.

"Stay. Please", she said, "I do not want to lie here alone now. Your touch is so wonderful. I have missed out so very much in my life so far."

He reached for her and stroked her silken hair.

"You are such a treasure. I do not deserve you at all", he whispered, shaking his head.

"You do. I knew that the moment I held you picture in my hands the first time", she answered.

He smiled at her, disbelieving, and she rolled around to come to lie with her back against his warm body. He put his heavy arm around her and his hand on hers. So they lay together in peace until Thorin remembered something else he wanted to talk to her about.

"You have made great progress in the past two months, Ama told me", he said thoughtfully.

When she did not answer, he continued:

"She also said it went much faster than with Wala."

"I am also much older than Wala was then", Alwa replied.

"Ama says it is because the gift is stronger in you. Much stronger."

"Ama can not really know it. And if it should be the case there is nothing I can do about it or against it."

Thorin had definitely the hunch she was trying to downplay what he said. She probably already knew what he was aiming at.

"She also says that you will soon be ready to get in touch with the deceased. And she told me that is a very dangerous matter", he concluded worried.

"I am not yet that far, even though...."

"Though what?", he insisted.

"In your rooms for example. It is Thror. I can not hear his words, but I can sense him. He does not like me. I am not good enough for you, he thinks. And his hateful dislike scares me a lot more than the men and women in the hall today", she whispered and threw a look of trepidation towards the open door to his rooms.