Heroin {harry styles}

10

Once the scary vein hides itself back in Harry's neck and he seems to have calmed down just a bit, he finally opens the car door and storms inside of his house.

I take another minute to gather myself together before deciding to go inside myself.

There's no sign of Harry when I enter the house. He must have gone to bed or something.

When I get to my room, I only bother to take off my heels before collapsing in my bed. I have no idea what time it is, but I'm almost sure it's past midnight. I need to sleep.

But I can't.

My mind is racing and even though I'm exhausted, it won't rest. Thoughts of when I first met Harry are buzzing through my head, and all I can think about is the feeling of relief I got whenever the heroin was inside my body.

I've been so on edge lately, my mind and body are longing to feel like that just for one more second.

The thoughts of that indescribable feeling penetrate my brain and that's the last thing I remember before my alarm wakes me up.

I drag myself out of bed and the sight of myself in the mirror shocks me. It's almost as bad as when I first woke up the day after my overdose (if I can even call it my overdose, considering I'm technically not the one who caused it).

The bags under my eyes are more prominent than ever and once again I look pale as a ghost.

I'm about to walk out to the bathroom to get ready when I stumble over something that definitely wasn't there before.

Shopping bags.

All of the clothes Harry and I bought yesterday are sitting neatly inside my door.

Did Harry bring these in?

I completely forgot we went shopping yesterday after our experience at Niall's house, and the fight afterwards.

Looking down, I see that my tiny dress has ridden up to look almost like a shirt.

Thank god I didn't walk down the hall like this.

I dig out a plain outfit out of the first bag I see and put it on just to head to the bathroom to shower and finish getting ready for the day.

When I finally look presentable and not nearly as sick as when I woke up, I check the clock and realize I'm two minutes early to the time Harry wants me downstairs. I almost do a happy dance as that's one less thing he can yell at me for today.

In the kitchen, I decide I can't afford to mess up breakfast today, so I just pour two bowls of cereal for myself and Harry's breakfast and set the milk next to his. Usually I don't eat breakfast, but my body needs it today.

Harry comes downstairs in his usual black outfit just as I'm washing my empty cereal bowl and the dishes from yesterday. Without a word, he eats breakfast and as usual I have no clue if I should talk to him or not.

Since talking to him in the past has resulted in rudeness every time, I don't say a word.

Harry's chest brushes against my shoulder as he reaches over me to put his empty bowl in the sink and of course he startles me and I jump.

I turn to see him smirking but my cheeks are heating up in embarrassment so I look back down to the dishes quickly.

I wash his bowl quickly, seeing as it's the last dish and he finally speaks when I turn around.

"Here's your list of chores for the day," he says almost cheerfully. Well, cheerfully for Harry so far. Definitely still more monotone than the average person. "I'm going out to work today and I expect those things to be done when I get home."

I don't even get the chance to respond before he's out of the kitchen.

I stare at the list on a sticky note and it reads in very sloppy handwriting:

- Vacuum living room and hallways
- Dust everything
- Laundry (stay out of my room, it's outside the door)

His house is huge so it might take a little time, but that stuff seems easy enough.

Easy enough, but still mind-numbingly boring. I can't believe I have to do this stuff every day.

This would also be way better if you were high again.

My subconscious comes back just like last night and again, I can't disagree. But I try to push the thought out of my head anyway. It won't leave though. I'm stuck with the thoughts of that one short-lived experience with the drug running circles around my head for the rest of the day.

By the time I finish my chores, it's evening. Harry didn't give any indication on when he'll be back, so I find some frozen food to make for dinner. He can heat it up later.

Since I hardly got any sleep last night, I manage a few bites of dinner but I end up cleaning the dish and going to bed early.

Today might've been boring, but at least I didn't have to experience another one of Harry's fits of anger.

I find some pajamas in the shopping bags in my bedroom. I still can't believe he brought them inside and put them in my room. It freaks me out a little that he was in here while I was sleeping, but I would've been lost this morning without them.

Deciding to put all of the clothes away in the closet tomorrow, I turn off the light and get in bed.

It's a wonder that as tired as I am, my body won't fall asleep. I can't live like this.

I need sleeping pills or something. Anything to stop my brain.

Like heroin.

Tossing and turning, I'm too hot, then I'm too cold. My body is doing anything to avoid sleep and I have no idea how long I lay awake for.

At one point, I think I even hear Harry come home. But thankfully he doesn't come find me so I assume I haven't done anything wrong today.

Just as I'm about to fall asleep, my stomach churns and I immediately get up and spring to the bathroom. I make it to the toilet just in the nick of time to throw up the little food I ate today.

When I'm sure I can't possibly throw up any more, I brush my teeth and stumble back to my bed. As another sleepless night drags on, I feel worse and worse.

But the worse I feel, the more I need to feel better.

a/n
sorry this one was a bit of a filler. but it was a double update, don't forget to vote! thanks so much for reading!