𝙢𝙞𝙨𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙣𝙙𝙞𝙣𝙜. - 𝚊𝚗𝚍𝚢 𝚜𝚊𝚖𝚋𝚎𝚛𝚐

he wanted to kiss me.

This is a random room. There's nothing special about it: there are some colored chairs randomly organized, a huge wood table in the middle of it, a huge white couch on the counter of the room and some abstract paintings on the wall. He leads the way to the couch. He takes a chair and drags it next to the couch. He sits in it and I sit on the couch, but a bit far from him. The space between us is filled with questions, insecurities... and secrets.

He takes a sip of his coffee and I do the same (so it doesn't look like I'm waiting for him or something). He looks at me and I have a mouthful of ice tea yet. Just stop it [Y/N].

"So..." he says.

"So..." I say.

He lifts up his eyebrow, waiting for me to say something. I do the same. He snorts.

"Why you left the party crying?" he asks leaning forward and touching my knee.

"Well..." Just let it out, it's gonna be okay. "When I found out about you and Joanna, I freaked out, because..." I can't do this, I can let it out. "...because I realized how much I missed not coming with you. How changed we are, building our own careers, building a family... I just missed the old days."

"Oh, lil pie, I missed you too, and the old days, when we used to do comedy shows at Jorma's backyard and our little parties. But our Berkeley life is gone, what we have is now. And I'm pretty happy you're working at the same place we are." He leans closer to me. "The foursome is back."

"Our parties were so nice, remember when Teri forgot to bring Akiva's cake, and you had to take the one your mom made to Mrs. Postnova?" I chuckle.

"That was a great one." He laughs with me.

He seems happy. But I feel overwhelmed. I just lied to him. Again. Even though he seems understanding with this, I need to let this out. Before it kills me.

"Andy..." Why this is so hard?

"Yes?" He leans even closer to me.

"That's not true." He looks confused. "I didn't leave the party because of this. I left because of Joanna...and you...and me." Why do I keep procrastinating?

"I don't follow."

"I left the party because... because... I have these messed up feelings for you."

He's still confused. Why men are so dumb? Is he really going to make me say it? This time, I snort. "I think I'm in love with you."

No response. Not even a movement of his body. He looks shocked. I can't say if it's in a good way or bad way. His lips tremble a bit, being the only sign of living off him. I take a sip of my tea, so it doesn't get more uncomfortable.

"Wow... hum... I don't really know what to say, I mean...I..."

"Just forget what I said, let's pretend this never happened. Just forget it." I say getting up and getting my purse.

He gets up suddenly and holds my arm, like wanting me to stay. "I can't forget that. I don' want to forget it." What does he mean by that?

"I don't want this to affect our relationship. Friendship. Our friendship." Just fixing this, in case he gets more confused.