𝙢𝙞𝙨𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙣𝙙𝙞𝙣𝙜. - 𝚊𝚗𝚍𝚢 𝚜𝚊𝚖𝚋𝚎𝚛𝚐

overthinking.

Andy is in a meeting with the SNL crew. They are probably discussing something about tonight's episode and all the skits. I'm waiting for him like 45 minutes now, outside the room. I have to admit, I'm looking good this evening. I'm kinda dressed up, with a cute little dress and I even put make-up on, just to see Andy perform tonight.

We can assume this is our first official date since when never went on a date together - even though, I always counted as our first date the day when we went to that restaurant and the waiter called us Mr. and Mrs. Samberg. But this is the first time we are "together", as a couple, which is intimidating. I bet that everybody here used to love Joanna and Andy together. You're overthinking.

Through the glass window, I see Andy getting up with a huge smile on his face, followed by Seth and Bill. Others do the same and head towards the big wood door. One by one, they exit the room and he shows up, in his grey button shirt. He waves at me and moves his hand, like if he is calling me. I get up too quick and trade in his direction, but before talking to him, Jason leaves the room at stares at me. He stares at Andy, and opens a malicious smile at him, hiding it from me. Andy smiles back, but he can't hold his laugh.

I get in the room. Before he closes the door behind him, I start.

"I didn't understand that." I say, throwing my purse on one of these random chairs.

"Let's say I have already told Jason, Seth, Jorma, Akiva and everybody else about us." he holds me by hips.

"What exactly did you say to them?" I ask, hoping he has already introduced me as his girlfriend, while he kisses my neck.

"I said I'm going out with you." he replied, with his face still on my neck.

It's been two weeks since he broke up with her. I know it would be so early to ask someone to be their girlfriend when you only know them for two weeks, but our situation is different. I know him since we started feeling the heat of puberty.

You're overthinking again.

He trails my neck with kisses and my eyes roll up instantly. His fingers rub my thighs, lifting my dress very slowly and kissing my lips, like if I was not going to realize what he is doing. My hands push his away from my thighs and a naughty laugh comes out of his mouth.

"I like you so much." he says during the kiss.

You like me? You only like me?

Suddenly, my face loses the joy. That's the moment I realize I'm the one feeling too much, loving him too much, giving myself too much. I should be at the same pace as him. But who am I to blame? I was the one that messed his thoughts up, the one that was in love all this time and didn't want to admit it.

His lips embrace my eras and his tongue caresses my earlobes. But my mind is not here. My mind is rewinding the moment I saw Andy and Cassidy leaving the prom together, the moment Andy introduced Joanna as his wife-to-be, one day in freshmen year when he said he saw me as a sister... All these things come to mind in a quarter of a second.

He sees my lack of excitement and he stops. His look at me says everything. He's questioning me with his sight. I can almost hear his brain working so hard to figure me out. I look down.

"I'm sorry," that's the only thing that comes to my mind right now.

"Is everything alright? Did I do something wrong?" he starts asking.

"No, I'm just overthinking." I look down to his chest.

"I don't want you worrying this little head of yours, okay?" he kisses the tip of my nose.

But I can't stop thinking about it. He just said he likes me, because he still loves Joanna. I'm loving someone who doesn't love me back.

"I have to go backstage and rehearse a bit more. Are you gonna be fine?" he asks, holding my hand and leading us to the door.

"I can survive." I say, ironically.

He smiles and he embraces me by the back. We leave the room, sharing the same pace with our steps, so we don't go apart. His chin is leaning on my right shoulder and before leaving, he smells my hair and whispers. "Don't leave with another handsome comedian."

"It's gonna be hard."