Growing From The Pain

8

I hear him stand so I let go. I find a towel quickly and hand it to him.

"Are you decent?"

"Of course I am." I turn to find that he still hasn't put the towel on. My face was red with fury, embarrassment, and blush. "I'm gonna murder you myself," I whisper. "Put the towel on."

"I'll think about it."

"Put the towel on," I say through clenched teeth. He sighs. I watch him tie it around his waist.

"There. Happy?" I nod. I push past the door and into his room angrily. I wasn't angry though. I just had to sell the thought. "Keith?" I sit in the window and stare out at the fields of fields and animals. "Keith buddy. Can you forgive me?" I didn't respond. "Come on, man. I apologize for letting you see that. I really am."

"Just shut up."I hear him flop on his bed. I see him lying there peacefully. Not yet asleep, but still lying there. "Get dressed or something. Maybe just put underwear on."

"Whatever you say." I watch him put them on. When he turns I quickly turn away again. "Keith," he says. I hear him walk over to me. "Keith," he whispers in my ear. "Will you turn around? I'm not naked anymore."

I chuckle. "Fine." When I turn I receive a tight hug. "What's this?"

"I'm thanking you for my hand." He pauses. "And for being an amazing friend." He moves back. I see a huge smile plastered on his face. "Now I'm gonna take a nap." He pats me on the back before heading to his bed again. I watch him fall asleep. His back rises and falls. Then I started to freak out.

"What the hell is going on?" I rush downstairs and out into the coming night. The cold air covers my skin as I head to a hill where a single cow and tree stand. Juniberries grow in abundance around that area. When I make it I realize who the cow is. "Kalternecker!" I hug the familiar animal.

He just continues eating. I sit on the dewing grass and stare at the setting sun on the horizon. Vibrant oranges and reds soon become sullen blues and purples in the sky. I sit in the grass near the cow and watch it. A beautiful lays itself out for me. "Kalternecker can I ask you a question?" The crunching of grass is my reply. "What should I do? How am I supposed to feel? Lance is an amazing friend, but I'm starting to see him as more. I know I'm supposed to be making sure he's alright, but he seems fine." I sigh.

"Maybe it's just because he has someone with him now. He's not so alone anymore."

"What do you mean? Doesn't he have his family?"

"Well yeah, but he made another one in space. And that one feels broken. It feels nice to at least put one piece back together." I turn in the grass to the blank expression of the cow.

"You're so wise," I say to him. He continues eating grass. I hop up and head back to the house. A light shines on the second floor. It's from Lance's room. Inside Lance is panting in quick breaths. I rush to his side. "It's okay. You're okay. I'm here. Keith is here. I've got you. I've got you."

He was wheezing and breathless. I push against his sweaty, heaving, bare chest. He slowly lays back down. He encloses my hand with both of his. "Stay with me," he says short of breath. I smile.

"I'm not going anywhere." I climb into the bed with him. Not under the covers, but I stay there with him. Hold him. Comfort him.

🌷🌷🌷

The morning comes quickly. I move my hand and it comes in contact with nothing. My eyes shoot open. "You really do wake up like that all the time." I find Lance looking at me from the corner of the bed.